I dont think you were too harsh in fact if i caught my ds doing such a thing doubtful if he would be going on a sleepover for a long time till i was sure he would never spit again.
Doesnt matter if we agree with your bedtime rountine or not it is what suits your family. If you little boy is upset at the earlier bedtime and thinks spitting onto his sisters bed is the answer then he does need to learn consequences of his actions and by the sound of it there was a lot of spit.
Also my way of thinking if he is allowed to go now then he will think spitting is the answer and will continue.
Children they are sent to try us
When someone tells you nothing is impossible, tell them to go slam a revolving door
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