Mindee annoying me big time

[BuggsieMoo]

Ive been looking after Mindee (aged 9) for about 8 months now and originally all was going well. However of late the following has been happening and its really starting to pee me off

1) Lack of manners - such as burping and farting at the table and trying to get the younger ones to copy
2) Not listening when been spoken to - such as being pulled up about behaviour to which mindee rolls eyes and walks off! Have been firmer on this one
3) Messes around lots at the table (and eats like an animal to be fair) - dont get me wrong I dont mind chatting at the table but when it disrupts the whole dinner time routine - then sorry it is too much
4) Brings own drinks that have the take off lids- like fruit shoots. Anyhow I keep finding thse lids just dumped all over my house and on my front doorstep- I do have bins! Not only do I not want to be picking up after a 9yr old who knows better I have younger mindees for which this is a choking hazard
5) We have a rule of no running in the house as its small and others will get hurt - this gets ignored on a daily basis and again encourages others to copy
6) To top it all off, ive just opened the lego drawer (as I found some mindee had left out despite being asked to put away) and low and behind is mindees empty drink bottle in there!!!!Again I have bins and mindee has been asked more than once to put them into the bin

Ive already given notice to family (17 weeks notice) as I am moving but im starting to not enjoy having this child in my house.

Any suggestions - I personally feel at 9 they know better!

BuggsieMoo x

[Pipsqueak]

wow - sounds like the doppleganger of the 8 yr old I care for - ignorant, challenging, rude, intolerant, deliberately obtuse.

He is learning VERY quickly that the more he pees me off the MORE I can pee him off.
He gets to sit on the sofa - no tv, no games nothing , nada, zilch
Or he gets to sit next to me at dinner or on a stool at the kitchen units rather than at the table.
When everyone else is out playing - he gets to watch from the chair he is sitting on in the kitchen near my who is tiding up and singing very loudly and badly

I am more annoying, brattish, pigheaded, bullish, harder, tougher, funnier, clever, bigger and so on than him!

[singingcactus]

Grrrr, I'm afraid I'd be telling mum that he is no longer allowed to bring those drinks and will be given a glass of water at meal times...end of! There would be no discussion.

Running - I hear you, I am telling all mine, esp the big ones that at my house we do not run, every single day. Yes it has gotten old. Worse still when they answer back with, well my mum lets me. My response is usually along the lines of 'do I look like your mum?' 'Does this look like your home?'.

The toilet behaviour at the table, to be honest, is probably best ignored. The more attention it gets the more it will escalate. Eating like an animal...loosing battle probably, try hard to ignore it .

The eye rolling I also get daily, some days I ignore it, some days I just ask if it hurts to roll his eyes that much. Can't really get at the kids for that cos I'm probably worse than them all for it lol.

But the bottles I would definitely ban from my home, the tops are a hazard and the leaving the bottles around is lazy and darned rude!

[sunflower]

Do you have a house rules policie? If so i would get him to read it and ask him what he thinks, if he thinks his behaviour is acceptable.
I would also ask him if he could help you with showing the other mindees how to behave.
Good luck

[The Juggler]

wow - sounds like the doppleganger of the 8 yr old I care for - ignorant, challenging, rude, intolerant, deliberately obtuse.

He is learning VERY quickly that the more he pees me off the MORE I can pee him off.
He gets to sit on the sofa - no tv, no games nothing , nada, zilch
Or he gets to sit next to me at dinner or on a stool at the kitchen units rather than at the table.
When everyone else is out playing - he gets to watch from the chair he is sitting on in the kitchen near my who is tiding up and singing very loudly and badly

I am more annoying, brattish, pigheaded, bullish, harder, tougher, funnier, clever, bigger and so on than him!

would love to be a fly on the wall when that is going on

[BuggsieMoo]

Do you have a house rules policie? If so i would get him to read it and ask him what he thinks, if he thinks his behaviour is acceptable.
I would also ask him if he could help you with showing the other mindees how to behave.
Good luck

Tried that one - falls on deaf ears. Dont get me wrong mindee can be very well behaved but behaviour is becoming more frequently not acceptable, Think ill have a chat with mindee after school, then parents on collection and advise how it needs to be or I will give the 4 weeks now.

[primula]

Is he 'punishing' you because you are moving? Dont know the details but just wondered if he knows you are moving and will miss you?!

[sunflower]

Is he 'punishing' you because you are moving? Dont know the details but just wondered if he knows you are moving and will miss you?!

haha sorry ....i bet you wont miss him ( he sounds like a right nightmare)

[Pipsqueak]

ACtually you have reminded me that said 8yr old was in a foul mood on way to school this morning (I meet with his mum/him on the way). I have him after school tonight and its his dad collecting him and he doesn't want to go with his dad. He thinks by sulking he can get his own way... he forgot he was with me tonight.


Honestly Buggsie... bigger, badder and madder... works everytime...

[breezy]

I'm with Pip on this one, dont get mad, get even
If they behave like that at my table they leave the table and sit on the stair doing nothing until we've finished then they can sit at the table on their own and eat. I'd ban the drinks, they have what I provide or nothing.
If they run in the house, they have to sit still and do nothinguntil they decide not to run!
I'm a tough old witch

[BuggsieMoo]

Well we had a little chat about mindees behaviour. Mindee tried to play me when home and had a very stern warning that I could and would use the time out step for them through behaviour that was not acceptable. I also advised anything that got broken through them not doing as asked would be billed to their parents. Mindee bucked ideas up tonight and became very helpful

I also made mindee walk around the whole of my downstairs and doorstep and pick up every piece of litter they had dropped including the bottle in the lego drawer where I left it just for them!

[breezy]

Good for you, it'll work, keep it up

[Pipsqueak]

Well we had a little chat about mindees behaviour. Mindee tried to play me when home and had a very stern warning that I could and would use the time out step for them through behaviour that was not acceptable. I also advised anything that got broken through them not doing as asked would be billed to their parents. Mindee bucked ideas up tonight and became very helpful

I also made mindee walk around the whole of my downstairs and doorstep and pick up every piece of litter they had dropped including the bottle in the lego drawer where I left it just for them!

I think you just need to lay the law down firmly and consistently and don't give an inch. Once they realise you are firm but fair it becomes easier.
My 8yr old mindee has finally given in and started eating the meals I provide because he realised me and mum were conversing and he was going hungry.
He also realised that I hear and see EVERYTHING - as the younger kids tell him... Pip is magic!

[breezy]

He also realised that I hear and see EVERYTHING - as the younger kids tell him... Pip is magic!

WITCH