This gets on my nerves

[nipper]

I look after a really 'moody' three year old who really is beginning to try my patience...when she doesn't get her own way or things don't go her way she sulks and I mean a flat out 'I'm not talking to you'. I find it very 'trying' to say the least. She attends twice a week with two other little ones aged 16 months and 10 months and I am beginning to wonder why her parents chose to send her to me and not a nursery where she would be with children of a similar age. Apparently she did attend a nursery with an outstanding classification but her parents didn't rate it.

Another thing, when parents come to collect her she expects to be picked up and carried out the front door...the same child who walks to school and back with me four times a day. Me thinks she has her mum and dad wrapped round her pinkie...

Any ideas or suggestions? I'm not saying I want to terminate her contract because I can bear it for now but I still find it quite testing. Her speech is very unclear and extremely immature and I when I have mentioned it to parents they just sort of shrug it off. I have also been trying to teach her her colours and number but she doesn't seem to be able to retain information even in the two days I have her.

[adele1985]

Hi hun
I know exactly how you feel as ive got a child like this (shes 9 so she knows what she is doing)

When she strops ( which if everytime shes not getting my attention or her own way) she gets totally ignored

I have spoken to mum and thankfully she is really supportive we have made a sticker chart and if she behaves without having any melt downs she gets a sticker

Ive found that ignoring the strops works the best and giving the other children lots of possitive attention

Hope this helps :-)

[JCrakers]

It does sound like she is treated younger than she is at home maybe hence the lack of speech? All she has to do is have a little strop and she gets her way so no need to string a sentance together?
From the way she wants to be pickd up when parents arrive when usually she is fine walking.

I would stick to your guns when she has her strops and dont go back on your word. Ignore the tantrums etc and give the other children some attention.
I have a set of parents who pander to their dd when she has a tantrum, trying to pick her up and asking her what the matter is, trying to bargain with her and I just see it getting worse with her kicking and lashing out. I try to give advice but it doesnt work. I hear nightmare stories of supermarket shopping and chidl screaming in the middle of the aisle...when shes here, she has no tantrums at all.

[breezy]

I have a 4 yr old mindee like this, she gets totally ignored while having " thinking time" and I make a great fuss of the others until shes ready to join us!
She is also very spoilt and very immature

[Milli147]

I agree with everyone else, ignore her!

I find with my own children and minded children they get bored very quickly having flounced off if nobody follows them....make sure she can hear you doing something really fun with the others and when she returns just smile and include her, and don't even mention the strop. Promise it works!

You can't stop her parents babying her if they want to. She will grow out of it and/or get too heavy to be lugged about soon enough, and if neither of them have a problem with it then let it be

[The Juggler]

ignore, her. it's just her form of a tantrum - asserting her control. I've had children like this, those that kick and scream and those that sob gently so all the other children then run to comfort them

walk away or just ignore the ignoring and carry on talking to her knowing full well you won't get an answer. That'll probably eventually get her to see that it doesn't work.

or like with tantrums you could try explaining her behaviour to her by talking to the other children

'x doesnt want to talk to us right now she's a bit cross because I said she can't have ......' dont worry she'll come and talk to us again in a bit when she feels ok - then smile over at her