Ex screamer, new problem?

[funemnx]

I mind a little fella age 3 years (just) 4 days a week, 2 days he is 9 - 3 at playgroup and 2 full days with me, he was really hard work for the first 2 years but since last Christmas has been a lovely little fellow, very happy and chatty and sociable - until he started playgroup in September. At first he cried every time I took him there and still gets anxious but we're getting there, he really enjoys his time there. The last month though, on days he stays with me all day, he cries when we're at a toddler group especially when it comes to song time at the end. Now he's crying even when it's tidy-up time and wants to sit on my knee all the way through. I'm pretty sure it's linked to starting playgroup, he constantly asks if he has to go today (even on school pick up time at 3!)

I've been very patient with him, asking him why he's crying but he says he doesn't know - any ideas?

[sarah707]

Some children find it very hard to cope with transition times - when they have to change what they are doing.

I find visual timetables help... photos and pictures which take them through their days so you don't have to keep reassuring them, they can go to their timetable and see what is happening next.

You can focus them on the next exciting thing as well - I know you are upset about tidying up but remember from your timetable we will go to the park / have our lunch / see John etc next.

Hth

[funemnx]

Thanks Sarah, I will do one for him, I can't think of any other reason for his upset apart from playschool, so assuming it must be that.

[Nature'sKids!]

If it is upsetting him so much going to nursery I would have a chat with the parent about delaying nursery.
Keeping on sending him and saying "he enjoys it and e'll get used to it" etc. Is being in denial I think.
Ive got personal experience of children who enjoyed being in a setting but cried for weeks, months and had nightmares for over 6 months.
Even now one particular child, who was only left for a week, at the beginning of the year, gets upset about what was essentially a forced separation.
If he doesn't need to go and it's clearly upsetting him it doesn't do anyone any good