parent stormed off with child

[candy cat]

Hi folks I haven't been on for a while as life as been a tough few months (dad died a few weeks ago) Anyway got an issue ......On Tuesday mindee (who is always sent ill) came full up with cold.....quiet, but ok,( have issues as child refuses to drink) tried everything but just screams until sick,(mum says don't worry) can't force her!

Dad picked up mentioned she had had no drink and he had a right go saying she is ill with a cold etc and you give her no fluids!? I said I am not in the habit of force feeding children So I said well if you feel she's ill then keep her at home tomorrow and you can keep an eye on her fluid intake! he stopped shouting then

Wednesday mum turns up, mindee who normally runs in starts crying/screaming so mum picks up and says I don't think your well are you,youv'e been up all night coughing,temp etc......now what would all you lovely childminders say at this point? I looked up and said VERY NICELY 'well should she be here?' she shouted 'well i'll take her home then shall i!?' I said 'well if she is ill should she be here?' Well she just stormed off and skidded down the road in her car
Dad then phones having a go at me....I told him what was said and reckons she was just talking out loud when she said mindee had been ill in night. He tried to dictate to me things to which point I said enough and said good bye.

Mindee due back on Monday and i feel contact should be made before then by
mum as I am upset by it all and after all the heartache I have had over the last few weeks i just don't need it! This mindee took a year to settle and is still really hard work I had 8 hours screaming a day to start with and so much effort and hard work as been done by me. I feel so angry about it all. dad goes on about being professionals and have to work ...well so am i and i had to have time off a few months ago because i caught a bug from their child! They feel they should send child and leave me to decide if well enough to stay? They signed my sick policy and after last time every parent got a polite notice about sickness. I have always got on with mum.

what would you all do?

[rosebud]

I would do nothing today and them tomorrow send a friendly text message asking whether the child is feeling any better. You will have given everyone time to calm down, made contact and been professional. See what happens from there.

[buzzy bee]

I would do nothing today and them tomorrow send a friendly text message asking whether the child is feeling any better. You will have given everyone time to calm down, made contact and been professional. See what happens from there.

that's what I'd do too.

big hugs

[Newbie1!]

Same as the above and also wanted to pass on my sympathies for your loss - at the moment you have to look after yourself and your family and try not to waste too much time worrying about people who are quite obviously very rude and arrogant and unable to maintain a reasonable amount of calm!!! xxx

[missymood]

So sorry for your loss.
I would also do the above too. Let the dust settle

[caz3007]

Hugs to you, sorry to hear of your loss

I agree with the others, just send a friendly text, saying you are wondering how LO is and hope they are ok

[mumx3]

As above, and sorry for your loss.

But you need to update/enforce your sickness and absence policy.

Mine says, they cannot attend with a temperature (I have taken temp on door step before now, and said no). Also I specifically say that unless the child can comfortably take part in the daily routine (such as toddler group, school run etc) they may not attend.

This is to make sure that all children have their needs met. I cannot look after safely 3 under 5's with one child who is too ill to get off the sofa and just wants cuddles all day.

This little girl needs to be at home with parents. Change the phrasing from "Should she be here?" QUESTION to "She should not be here" STATEMENT

Tough I know, but they will not be happy when she makes you ill and you have to take time off.

[The Juggler]

oh hon, sorry for your loss

if it were me, I couldn't leave it - but that's just me. I would call or drop a note round saying something like....

'I hope LO is feeling better. Sorry you felt upset yesterday but clearly your child was unwell and looked like she needed to be with her mum at home. Whilst I know this is not always easy with you for work, it is best for her.

I know policies sometimes seem like endless paperwork but, they are there for a reason. She needs to be at home if she's unwell - it is in her best interest to be with you but as well as that, sending her when she is ill might mean she passes on the illness. If I get ill, I will have to take time off work and then yourselves and all the other families I work for will be unable to get to work until I am better.

I hope that you appreciate and understand this and I really hope we can put this behind us and maintain the friendly relationship we have always had.'


hope she is ok on monday