New-ish CM. Im finding it a slog :-(

**juslh** · 24-07-2011, 06:21 PM

I don't know if its the job, or the mindees, or just me, but its a lot harder than I thought it would be.

I knew none of this in advance:

Mindee 1 has a severe stammer and behavioural problems. He is 3. He is quietly defiant on a daily basis. I try to shut the car door, he pushes it open.I try to open the door, he pulls it shut. I say no to something, he does it again smiling at me. I said stop throwing the balls around please, he throws one right in my face from up close. And so on. We do have moments of harmony but then he will suddenly start screeching in my ear for no apparent reason. When mum turns up, all hell breaks loose.

Mindee 2 is a baby of 13 months. He WILL NOT EVER sleep anywhere but a cot. And on any given day I never know whether he will need to nap am or pm. Mum never seems to be able to advise. I can try to put him down only for him to scream the place down ...or I can keep him up and he is clingy and grizzly. Mum seems at her wits end with him too. And the biggy she forgot to mention - he is a breath holder and likes to paddy himself unconcious. Its horrible.

Coupled with this I have my own children so I have to do a school/pre-school drop off, a lunchtime pre-school pick up, and another school pick up so squeezing the baby's nap in can be a nightmare anyway.

Im not really expecting any advice since I guess it is how it is, I think I just needed to off load a bit! But I dread CM days now, and that can't be right, can it? I feel I have failed to be feeling like that, I have only been doing it a few months.

**blue bear** · 24-07-2011, 07:28 PM

Stop being so hard on yourself, childminding is hard work both physically and mentally but after a while it settles into a manageable routine,

Take charge of both children set the routine and the rules. With the three year old set out rules with him and the consequences for breaking them. Stay consistent at all times, don't let him get away with bad behaviour ever, he will soon realise at your house this is what happens.

Get a good routine going with baby, for example I go to toddlers in the morning, collect from preschool, home for lunch, cleaned up and into bed. Same every day, it takes a while but but will fall into routine.

**sarah707** · 24-07-2011, 07:32 PM

excellent advice from fifi.

It is a very hard job meeting every child's needs... I have been doing it for nearly 18 years and it's still tough until the children are in a routine that works for them and me.

We have morning outings, lunch then sleep. The children sleep in the buggy so they are portable for afternoon school pick ups ... they learn in time to settle with a quick rock.

I think the key is consistency. Good luck x

**Vickster** · 24-07-2011, 07:40 PM

I agree with the nap at that age, you should be able to keep the child busy unril after lunch and then put them down for a nap. 1pm is nap time here, even thoigh the 16 mth old goes down at 11am for Mum. He knows what to expect here and sleeps.

**The Juggler** · 25-07-2011, 07:43 AM

good advice. if the baby doesn't have a set routine, there is no reason why you can't develop one for him. mum will probably appreciate it

**Sarahbelle** · 25-07-2011, 10:41 AM

Originally Posted by fi fi

Stop being so hard on yourself, childminding is hard work both physically and mentally but after a while it settles into a manageable routine,

Take charge of both children set the routine and the rules. With the three year old set out rules with him and the consequences for breaking them. Stay consistent at all times, don't let him get away with bad behaviour ever, he will soon realise at your house this is what happens.

Get a good routine going with baby, for example I go to toddlers in the morning, collect from preschool, home for lunch, cleaned up and into bed. Same every day, it takes a while but but will fall into routine.

Same here. Out and About in the morning, lunch, naps for those that need them and for those that don't sleep, quiet time.