Can I be accused of neglect when a child bites another??

**shelly03** · 15-02-2011, 08:55 AM

Hi one of my minded children has special needs, last week he bit another child
obviously mum was not happy. I apologised and obviously reported it in my incident book. This morning when she came to drop off she said dad is not happy that nothing has been done about it. I was a little dumfounded and didnt get into a discussion however now I am furious what does he expect to be done about it. I also know for a fact that they have sued childcare providers in the past with their eldest child. They have told me (would never have taken them on if i had knew this) What should I do now? i havent bit the child and surely they are aware that these things happen even with the greatest supervision. really annoyed and worried about this now.

**Ripeberry** · 15-02-2011, 08:59 AM

What does she want you to do? Gag the other child?

If she is that unhappy she can give notice, but trying to sue you that is nasty

**snufflepuff** · 15-02-2011, 09:03 AM

I'd want to ask them what they want you to do exactly?! What on earth can you do?!

**marnieb** · 15-02-2011, 09:29 AM

How old are the children?? apart from a time out at the time of the incident (if they're old enough), then there's nothing else you can do.

Unless they're expecting you to do somehting drastic like excluding the other child???

**Mouse** · 15-02-2011, 09:29 AM

I think you need to follow your complaints procedure so they can see what you have done about it & what your conclusion is.

Rather than just an incident report, write it up as a formal complaint. That way the parents (and Ofsted, should it come to that) can see that you have followed it up & considered what you can do prevent it happening again.

**JCrakers** · 15-02-2011, 11:09 AM

omg...im astounded by parents sometimes. What do they expect you to do? Children bite, hit and smack...you can only be there to stop them and explain its wrong but you cant be on constant guard. I would ring Ofsted and let them know.. if they think they can do anything they are seriously off their rockers...

Cant believe how open we are in this job to being complained/sued etc...I would get in their beofre they do.....

Becky xx

**Blaze** · 15-02-2011, 11:36 AM

I would issue them with a copy of your biting policy...then give notice due to a change of circumstances!

**Tinglesnark** · 15-02-2011, 12:36 PM

Originally Posted by Blaze

I would issue them with a copy of your biting policy...then give notice due to a change of circumstances!

Totally agree with Blaze, get out while you still can! Scary family! I also agree that apart from filing a complaint and reviewing your RA, printing off your biting policy and making sure your bum is covered - also call Ofsted and ask for advice, i would speak to your insurance legal team too...

THEN RUN FOR THE HILLLLLLLLLLSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS........

**Beetlejuice** · 15-02-2011, 01:07 PM

My friend is in a similar situation atm. She had a little boy who was bitten whilst in her care by another child. The parents of the child who was bitten wanted the other child to be thrown out of the setting. It's all got a bit nasty and the child who was bitten was removed by the parent - and tellingly the 'biter' hasn't bitten anyone else!!! We think a lot of it was him being wound up by the other child as he's really nice natured without this other boy.

I would definitley be giving notice as they sound horrendous.

**The Juggler** · 15-02-2011, 02:22 PM

i had a biter and it didn'[t matter if I was 2mm away, 2 feet away or in the other room. Sometimes you just can't stop it by being there so I don't see how it is neglect. as long as you have monitoring and plans in place to manage it if it's constant and repeated but I think if that happened it would be a case of having to exclude the other child but not at the first instance.

**rickysmiths** · 15-02-2011, 02:42 PM

Golly, I can't believe I am reading this.

I have had incidents like this over the years and all was documented and explained, children dealt with as appropriate and that was an end of it.

**kindredspirits** · 15-02-2011, 03:38 PM

OMG no one could possibly sue for this - there is no proof of neglect, nothing in our requirements is about having your eyes on all children at all times, it would be impossible.

I'd give notice to this family - seriously is it worth the stress of wondering if you might be sued at some point??

**Louise0208** · 15-02-2011, 04:07 PM

Jeeeesus!!!

my kids would of been taken into care or on the at risk register if i was accused of neglect every time one bit the other (all thankfully now outgrown the habit)

id end the contract as you will never be able relax knowing you are 1 pinch away from a court case!....hand them there letter with a huge roll of cotton wool to wrap there child up in!

**flowerpots** · 15-02-2011, 04:14 PM

Originally Posted by Louise0208

Jeeeesus!!!

my kids would of been taken into care or on the at risk register if i was accused of neglect every time one bit the other (all thankfully now outgrown the habit)

id end the contract as you will never be able relax knowing you are 1 pinch away from a court case!....hand them there letter with a huge roll of cotton wool to wrap there child up in!

i agree hun, i dont think i would enjoy working with these parents

**wendywu** · 15-02-2011, 04:25 PM

I was just wondering how old are the children, and is the special needs child likely to continue biting due to his condition.

What im saying is are they getting annoyed because for example you have a special needs child who can be a tad aggressive due to his condition and he is older than the normal age of biters who dont know any different.

A child who bites at 18 months is eaiser to explain to parents than say a 4 year old.

**shelly03** · 15-02-2011, 09:34 PM

Originally Posted by wendywu

I was just wondering how old are the children, and is the special needs child likely to continue biting due to his condition.

What im saying is are they getting annoyed because for example you have a special needs child who can be a tad aggressive due to his condition and he is older than the normal age of biters who dont know any different.

A child who bites at 18 months is eaiser to explain to parents than say a 4 year old.

Hi the Biter has just turned 3 but has a development age of 9 months, Think the parents werent happy that I took this child on, very shallow minded people.

**Minstrel** · 15-02-2011, 09:39 PM

I'm going to put it from the other point of view (obv i don't know all the circumstances ages etc) but I (and other parents) have made a formal complaint to my sons' school. DS1 has a child in his class who has one to one supervision. I do not know his exact diagnoses so i will not speculate. My child has been DAILY spat at, punched, kicked, sworn at, pushed, pinched, bitten, tripped up, had cups of water thrown over him....you get the picture. He needs 100% supervision but this is not always adhered to and the advice from the teachers to the children to prevent themselves getting hurt is to RUN! My boys are now scared of school and tearful at the thought of any more pain. What would you do in my postion. The child is 7 btw.

**Minstrel** · 15-02-2011, 09:42 PM

BTW the complaint is about the heads handling of the situation not the childs behaviour.

**MaryMary** · 15-02-2011, 10:08 PM

When my DD was about 14 months she was at day nursery. One day, at pick up time we turned up to find the nurse looking after DD in a very distressed state, and the owner of the nursery also in the room waiting for us. Our DD had been bitten by another child, and had a mark on her face

We were assured that the child was being watched now, and steps were being taken to prevent this happening again. The other child was about the same age.
We said, ok, these things happen, you are dealing with it. The poor girl was so relieved - she thought we were going to go ballistic!
Apparently another parent some while before had gone into one in a similar situation, only to be told on another occasion that their child was now the biter!! That's Karma!

**The Juggler** · 15-02-2011, 10:20 PM

Minstrel I totally get your other perspective and when a child is hurting others so often that it's unmanageable I think it is bordering on neglectful to leave the child who is doing the harmiing in the environment. Regardless of special needs i think the other children have to be protected.

In the end i gave notice to my biter becuase mum wasn't workign with me, was in denial and I literally could not predict any triggers or frequency so couldn't do anything but be with the child for every second he was in my care. This didn't make for happy minding, nor protect the other children (or me).

Thus I felt as I couldn't prevent injury to the others it was neglectful of me t continue to have him in the setting.

However, for a first bite or even a couple I think to talk of neglect or suing is OTT. However, Minstrel in your shoes I'd also be complaining to the head.