How do you cope during the notice period?

[crazyhazy]

I was given notice from my 9y before and after schoolie on tuesday morning, she'll be here until the 9th Feb when the schools go on half term. The reason her mum gave was I wasn't catering enough for her age group and she was unhappy, which to be perfectly honest is nonsense. Yes I only have her and one other after schooler but I include them is deciding what we do and this girl never adds any suggestions and wants constant attention, but even my friend and mum have commented how happy she seems, especially running around playing with my two. So, I'm feeling a bit crap about it all and think either it's the mum who doesn't like me or mindee is just telling mum nonsense and she's chosen to believe her (she's done similar with her teacher at school, attention seeking maybe?). And I'm finding it really hard at drop off and pick up times to not say something, how do you get through these periods? Just smile and nod?

It's made worse by like tonight, since we came home at 3.30pm we've made gingerbread men, choc chip fairy cakes, then new play doh and played with that for ages (which she was really enjoying) then it gets to 5mins before her mum is due and she goes through to the living room and lies on the sofa playing her ds looking bored!

[Louise0208]

can i ask a contraversial question .......i know you folks aint gonna like this.....but......is she a single child?

if so this could explain a lot (i talk from experience, before i get shot down) the child could be mum & dads centre of the universe at home & shes not at school & CMs so resents going there.

[butterfly]

It is tricky - I've been through it a few times where I've given notice and parent was unhappy about it. It was awkward every pick time until eventually she made a couple of off-hand comments and then ended up crying!

All you can do is grin and bear it I think. Maybe try and make the afternnons as interesting as possible - ensure she makes something to take home!

[crazyhazy]

Louise - yep you guessed right, only child and mums on her own so she normally has all her attention. I'm not sure what the deal is obviously just what mum said to me, but her new childminder has another child from her class at school and more older kids so it may be she knew that.

Butterfly - to be honest I've never liked the mum, she's very opinionated and negative about everything so it's not all bad news cos I won't have to see her everyday once she's gone lol

[glitzygal]

When she is playing,try taking a few pictures of her, some where she doesnt know your taking them, her mum then can see she is joining in,,,,you could say you want some pics to remember her by,,, and show mum them,,try getting few of her playing around different stuff.

i think she just feeling too old for a childminder,like they do, as some friends of hers proberly dont go to childminders and are allowed to go out to play.

good luck,,
show her mum the smily ones of her

[nokidshere]

Louise - yep you guessed right, only child and mums on her own so she normally has all her attention. I'm not sure what the deal is obviously just what mum said to me, but her new childminder has another child from her class at school and more older kids so it may be she knew that.

Butterfly - to be honest I've never liked the mum, she's very opinionated and negative about everything so it's not all bad news cos I won't have to see her everyday once she's gone lol

I have a new child starting soon uncannily with the same details as yours? LOL Hope its not the same child

I have children from the girls class here and only do after school - mainly over 8's now although 2-3 younger ones. She said that her child has grown out of her present childminders situation and she would be sad to leave her but she wants her daughter to be able to walk home from school with her friends etc now she is getting older.

I don't think you should take it personally though - even though its hard not to. There are lots of reasons why a childminder becomes unsuitable but most of them are to do with the child and their family rather than the childminder.

[crazyhazy]

I have a new child starting soon uncannily with the same details as yours? LOL Hope its not the same child

I have children from the girls class here and only do after school - mainly over 8's now although 2-3 younger ones. She said that her child has grown out of her present childminders situation and she would be sad to leave her but she wants her daughter to be able to walk home from school with her friends etc now she is getting older.

I don't think you should take it personally though - even though its hard not to. There are lots of reasons why a childminder becomes unsuitable but most of them are to do with the child and their family rather than the childminder.

Thanks, are you in scotland? I think if she'd just said she wanted to spend time with more kids her age I wouldn't have taken it so hard, it's the fact she had to add that she's unhappy here (but the mum is the most negative person I've ever met so shouldn't be surprised). I am feeling more positive about it now will mean no more rushing back for her coming home from school so will be able to do more activities out and about with the little ones, will be glad when I've survived the last collection though!

[nokidshere]

Thanks, are you in scotland? I think if she'd just said she wanted to spend time with more kids her age I wouldn't have taken it so hard, it's the fact she had to add that she's unhappy here (but the mum is the most negative person I've ever met so shouldn't be surprised). I am feeling more positive about it now will mean no more rushing back for her coming home from school so will be able to do more activities out and about with the little ones, will be glad when I've survived the last collection though!

Phew - no I am in Wiltshire!

Glad you are feeling better about it though - every cloud and all that ...