Anxious about joining drop-in group

[Kel04]

Hi everyone

Not posted for a long time; has been very quite on the childminding front

I have a newbee starting in January and his mum would like me to take him to a Childrens Centre. At the moment I have a 19 mnth old mindee and I want to take him to my local group on a Monday (childminders session) that way when the new lo starts in January I will have got to know my centre. Trouble is I am a very anxious person and I am finding the thought of going to a drop in centre on my own very very very daunting!!!

Over the weekend I have worked myself up into a frenzy about going today (one minute I've decided to go, the next I've talked myself out of it ). Well it's got to Monday and I haven't gone and now I'm beating myself up about not going (I feel such a failure). I feel that I should be going to these groups and that when I have my NCMA/Ofsted visits they are going to pull me up on this. The thought of meeting new people terrifies me.

Does anyone else get anxious about things like this?

[venus89]

I'm a very shy person so yes, I do, but I', also conscious that I don't want to pass my flaws onto my children so with me it was a case of forcing myself to go along. It can be hard, though, but when you get there you'll get a lot of support and hopefully make new friends too. Childminding can be a lonely job if you don't get yourself out there and meet other people, and the days pass quicker if you can go along to groups. I think your idea of starting with a Childminder Group is an excellent one.

Can you try phoning the person in charge of the group, talk to her first so you feel a bit more relaxed?

[Katiekoo]

I find it daunting to anywhere on my own for the first time, but you only have to push through the fear once - the following visit will be easier I promise. Sometimes you just have to push yourself a little and be really brave. Maybe you could try to find someone to go with the first time, or go just to have a look one week, then actually go in the following week, build up to it. If it is horrible and all your fears are true (they won't be!) you can always come home again knowing you tried. But I bet it's great, I bet someone really friendly greets you and makes you feel right at home.
Usually I say 'Hi I'm new - and I'm a bit nervous about meeting new people!' to the first person I see - then people are really nice and sensitive and show me round etc.
You can do it!

[Kel04]

Thanks for the replies....it's good to know I'm not the only one.

I've always had a real problem with shyness and anxiety (which got worse when my dd was born and having to bring her up on my own) and it's been quite hard for me because I'm conscious of the fact that it may be rubbing off on my dd (who is 10 now).

I don't want the minded children to have my anxiety to rub off on them and have tried to get my sister and nephew to come with me but she goes to other group with some of our friends but it is too far for me to go.

I'll have to try and pluck up the courage soon....it's the constant thinking about all the things that might go wrong (eg not finding anyone to talk to, ending up sitting in the corner on my own etc etc etc) that ends up talking me out of it

[birch24]

Where do you live? I would like someone to go out to groups with!

[Chimps Childminding]

I have to admit to being exactly the same June and I went to a cm meeting a couple of weeks ago and one of the cm there asked if we would like to go to their tots group on a Weds morning. It is in a different village to us, and although I know a couple of the minders there (one is my ex sil - though we get on ok) I don't really know any of them very well and as June doesn't work on a Weds I couldn't face going on my own

I have always been the same, even when I pick dh up from the pub, I wait in the car park and ring him to say I am there rather than go in

[Kel04]

Where do you live? I would like someone to go out to groups with!

I'm in Hampshire

[Kel04]

I'm starting to feel a little better now (not stressing so much about not having gone).

[birch24]

Oh its a bit far for a toddler group. Perhaps we could visit a virtual one together! Sounds as tho a lot of us need someone to meet up with!!

[Kel04]

Oh its a bit far for a toddler group. Perhaps we could visit a virtual one together! Sounds as tho a lot of us need someone to meet up with!!

lol just a little too far!!!

[caz3007]

I'm in Hampshire

Why not ask on here if there is another CM in your town that may be interested in going with you or if they already go, perhaps you could strike up an online friendship for a couple of weeks and then bite the bullet.

[venus89]

Oh its a bit far for a toddler group. Perhaps we could visit a virtual one together! Sounds as tho a lot of us need someone to meet up with!!

I'm much better 'meeting. people online than in real life!

[birch24]

I'm much better 'meeting. people online than in real life!

Me too!! Thats explains why we are all on here!!
or facebook!

[MissTinkerbell]

Oh I wish you all lived near me I've just started up a new drop-in and finding it hard to persuade the CMs in our village, apart from a couple that they should come along. We have great support from the Children's Centre manager - just wish the other CMs could see what a great resource and support it could be.

[prettysunflower]

I'm in hampshire, would be happy to come with you or could point you in the direction of a support childminder from the hampshire network who may already attend the group

Amanda x

[Kel04]

I'm in hampshire, would be happy to come with you or could point you in the direction of a support childminder from the hampshire network who may already attend the group

Amanda x

Where in Hants do you live

[prettysunflower]

Where in Hants do you live

East Hampshire

[Kel04]

East Hampshire

That's a shame; I'm in Portsmouth so not quite in right area

[karen48]

Hi everyone

Not posted for a long time; has been very quite on the childminding front

I have a newbee starting in January and his mum would like me to take him to a Childrens Centre. At the moment I have a 19 mnth old mindee and I want to take him to my local group on a Monday (childminders session) that way when the new lo starts in January I will have got to know my centre. Trouble is I am a very anxious person and I am finding the thought of going to a drop in centre on my own very very very daunting!!!

Over the weekend I have worked myself up into a frenzy about going today (one minute I've decided to go, the next I've talked myself out of it ). Well it's got to Monday and I haven't gone and now I'm beating myself up about not going (I feel such a failure). I feel that I should be going to these groups and that when I have my NCMA/Ofsted visits they are going to pull me up on this. The thought of meeting new people terrifies me.

Does anyone else get anxious about things like this?

HI,

It took me months to work up the courage to go to my local childminding group. I kept saying right i'm going to go this week then I would talk myself out of it, but one day I did it and went along and that was 3 years ago and it was the best thing I have done. I've made a few friends but there is always someone to chat to about childminding and anything else. It break the day up and the children enjoy themselves. Just do it and i'm sure you will be fine.

Karen

[venus89]

Oh I wish you all lived near me I've just started up a new drop-in and finding it hard to persuade the CMs in our village, apart from a couple that they should come along. We have great support from the Children's Centre manager - just wish the other CMs could see what a great resource and support it could be.

Just the same here - mine's been running for 2 years and just beginning to take off. The next task is to delegate - that's not going down too well!