Anyone know of a book whic covers not coming first?

**Bitsy Beans** · 13-10-2010, 08:24 PM

Sorry wasn't sure how to title this thread.
Basically my son has ASD and as a result he's obsessed with coming first (down to predictability and perfectionism). He's constantly on about winning, coming first, "beating you" (even when he's eating dinner with his little sister) and is finding it hard to accept that he won't be first all the time. As such he gets distressed and very upset.
I wondered if there was a book out there which perhaps deal with children not coming first, enforcing the idea of trying your best rather than where you "finish". Both my husband and myself try and talk to our son (he's just turned 5) but it's having little impact. I wondered if there was a picture book available to cover this? I've tried looking on the internet but quite frankly can't see the wood for the trees

**sarah707** · 13-10-2010, 08:36 PM

I'd make one with him as the starring role!

Like a social story (does he use them in school?) which shows him trying his best in different situations and you and your husband praising him for trying hard.

So a photo of him on his bike and you praising him for good pedalling... a photo of him eating tea and you praising him for eating nicely... a photo of him playing football and you praising his dribbling skills...

Read it lots and lots as his very own story and let him take ownership.

Hopefully he will eventually suggest scenarios to add to it and you'll know you are winning.

xx

**Bitsy Beans** · 13-10-2010, 08:45 PM

Originally Posted by sarah707

I'd make one with him as the starring role!

Like a social story (does he use them in school?) which shows him trying his best in different situations and you and your husband praising him for trying hard.

So a photo of him on his bike and you praising him for good pedalling... a photo of him eating tea and you praising him for eating nicely... a photo of him playing football and you praising his dribbling skills...

Read it lots and lots as his very own story and let him take ownership.

Hopefully he will eventually suggest scenarios to add to it and you'll know you are winning.

xx

He doesn't use social stories in school - TBH his autism traits are more subtle but at home and in certain situations this is a BIG issue.
My H has just bought a shiny new digital camera so might get him to do what you suggest - although not too keen on myself having a starring role LOL.

But if anyone knows a suitable book too then that's great aswell - gives me lots of ammo IYKWIM