Hi, Firstly I love this forum! It makes me feel so 'normal' and that it isn't just me feeling this way!
secondly, sorry this is long........im exhausted as to what to do!!!
Anyway, mindee is 2.5yrs, I have had her just over a year, she has always been a little bit 'tough' shall i say! She is an only child of I think older parents, she isn't very sociable with other kids and people but she has always settled here no problem and adores my youngest (4 yrs old), older son and OH. Mum has always been a bit 'fussy' with her really, like she is still a baby almost, she still breast fed till recently and child demanded that she did it when it was home time!!! always to stall going home, kicks up a fuss at home time, wanting this, wanting to play with that, taking coat and shoes off etc that I have already put on ready for her to go! mum never forced anything on her, was always childs descision........until i put my foot down and said my time is as precious as yours with my family etc (she did seem to get offended by this but it made me more determined to be strong and stand my ground) almost every evening i get texts, calls half an hour before she comes to tell me what mood she may be in etc - i do have my own and 2 others i mind too.
well, since january 2010 i took on another child, same age, thought it would be great for her.........well, im finding it so hard, demanding, annoying!!! she wont have anything to do with the newest, relies alot on my own child who does adore her and will always fuss over her etc, she has moods like nothing i have seen before, if she doesnt want to speak to you.....she wont, if she doesnt want to eat.....she wont, she has a different issue to get through every week, its either potty trouble, grumpy from this, suffering with that, now she is scared of anything (actually cinderella) she is very controlling and manipulative really for such a young child, she tends to control the whole group on her moods
i think her mum forgets i have other children to mind as well as my own, everything is for attention, she needs my full attention all the time, when she first started she was very independent in a way, she had to feed herself etc, she is a fab talker (if she wants to) but now she takes hours to eat, will only eat when i prompt or if i put it on the fork, i try to ignore it and leave room etc to play with others and casually come to the kitchen to 'check' well, she hasnt moved since i left, she wants me to sit with her feeding her i think!
i do have a good working relationship with parents they do know what she is like, mum more fussy than dad, but mum will say, perhaps she just needs more attention today, or she needs more reassurance today...she is very needy with mum, as soon as mum comes to collect, she turns into a little devil, if she is still having tea (normally she is) the minute mum comes she wails, mum gets her down and says what about your tea??? then she throws paddys that she wants a plum, a biscuit anything - and yes mum gives it as soon as she is out of the door! she is usually outside screaming because she wants to get in the car herself and walk down my steps herself so mum brings her back up the steps for her to do it herself ITS SO FRUSTRATING!!!!
I think she needs a nanny! i keep saying to her mum, she wont speak etc and totally blanks the other mindee and physically cries if i say hold hands with them whilst doing nursery run etc, she has such a problem and she knows exactly what she is doing!
i just dont know what to do, she is always happy to come to my house and has moments of 'fun' but she is such a miserable toddler but very manipulating (mum is very much like this i have found.....in a nice way
we could be doing crafts etc and i will say 'ooh what do you want to do' her face screws up and she wont do it! she goes to a nursery 2 days and she really doesnt like it there she does cry when she goes. i would never give notice to the other mindee just because this one doesnt like her, her mum even says 'i was looking back in her diary and its been since january really she has these moods' i say well, i could have new children come and go whenever, new children start nursery and school, she has to get used to new things and people!!
Is is me or what
thanks if you have managed to get to here x x
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