crying child

**debs** · 11-03-2008, 01:24 PM

hi i have joined this forum for some help and support i have a 29 month child who for no reason just crys. for example today cried while eating dinner 3 times. every time i tried to calm the situation with three methods you could hear the build up of another outburst please help. i have looked after this child since 6 months old. very clingy baby but grew out of it.i also lookk after two other toddlers as for before after school dchildren and two beauties of my own. any advice

**sarah707** · 11-03-2008, 01:39 PM

Hello Debs and welcome!

I have a baby who cries (well screams actually) all day long... so I know how you feel!

Have you talked to the parents and found out their lunchtime routine? It may be that you are doing or not doing something which is familiar to the child and which he is waiting for or expecting.

Otherwise, children tend to get upset if they are anxious about being left of course, so something to look after belonging to or smelling of mum or dad might help them to settle a little more.

Hope this helps!

**angeldelight** · 12-03-2008, 10:17 AM

Poor you

Talk to the parents you need to work together on this one

Good luck hope you get it sorted

Angel xx

**debs** · 12-03-2008, 08:53 PM

thanks for your help think its because he gets one to one attention at home as only child and only with adults. has been with me two years and has only started doing this in the last two weeks. i think because the other children are talking more now he feels the only way to express his anger is to cry. he is throwing himself on the floor for his parents. i am glad i found this site its nice to have support.

**angeldelight** · 12-03-2008, 08:59 PM

If he has been coming to you for that long he is obviously settled with you now

He sounds spoilt and like he is doing it for attention - and hes getting it at home
Making your life more difficult really

You need to work with parent and have the same set of rules for when he has these tantrums - otherwise he is going to get confused and get more naughty and harder to deal with

Angel xx

**Schnakes** · 12-03-2008, 09:04 PM

I had a wee'un like this. Her mum had lots of leave, and when she came back to me she would cry unless I picked her up. I know this sounds harsh, but I just carried on as usual. In the end she stopped the crying becaus she knew it wasnt going to benefit her. I made a big fuss over her when she was just playing, and went out of my way to show her that if you arent screaming for no reason then you gets lots of positive attention. Lucky it has worked but OMG it was soooooo hard!

You have my sympathy!

Sx

**Splish Splosh** · 13-03-2008, 09:44 AM

good luck with this one i had one who came 2 days a week and she used to scream hysterical at the front door!

**yummymummy** · 13-03-2008, 09:56 AM

I had a child for 18 months and every single morning would cry when mum left, would cry if I walked out of room, if i went to the loo, if any of the other mindees touched her, looked at her or even breathed near her! She then was presented with a baby brother and cried every time he cried. Nothing I did really solved it. She would get a bit better throughout the morning, only had her until 1.30pm. Her parents basically just played with her the whole time when they were with her and so were so exhausted by the weekend that she went to grandparents!
I think sometimes unless the parents can tell you something that they do that makes things better some children are just like it!

**debs** · 05-04-2008, 12:40 PM

thanks for all your views. it actually really helps to hear some of you have the same problems as family and friends are great but they dont really know unless they deal with it. i am really close with mam and are getting to three main crying areas when his mam leaves, when other children arrive and when we have to go and collect another from school. the playing with other children seems to be a real problem and seems to want adult attention all the time. talk him through it i give a bit and he doesnt cry. a bit like blackmail really. parent is very supportive and just feel i am getting somewhere now. been on holiday for two weeks and feel alot fresher to deal with it. it is like you say yummymummy some children are just like this. shame really as i dont like to hear a child cry. it was quite embarasssing when he does it in public aswell but i think as long as i keep calm its ok.weekends are great lol.thanks all of you debs

**Trouble** · 05-04-2008, 12:42 PM

Originally Posted by debs

hi i have joined this forum for some help and support i have a 29 month child who for no reason just crys. for example today cried while eating dinner 3 times. every time i tried to calm the situation with three methods you could hear the build up of another outburst please help. i have looked after this child since 6 months old. very clingy baby but grew out of it.i also lookk after two other toddlers as for before after school dchildren and two beauties of my own. any advice

i have one exactly the same age and what your saying driving me insane so if you find the answer please let me know as i would appreciate it

**miffy** · 05-04-2008, 05:22 PM

Sorry Debs only just seen this

Pleased to hear things have improved a bit - think it helps that you are able to talk it through with mum who seems supportive

Hope it continues to go well

miffy xx

**debs** · 25-04-2008, 12:27 PM

hooray are finally getting there it has got alot better. parental support, ignoring the crying and talking to the child after to ask why and explain that that wasnt going to get own way by doing this. showing lots of attention and praising other children when outbursts occured to take their minds off it. telling the child no that it wasnt nice to listen to. not perfect but alot better. just had ofsted inspection and was brilliant with that so got a good report. i feel so much calmer when children are happier. dont like any unhappiness even in a stroppy way.

**Twinkles** · 25-04-2008, 12:32 PM

Glad thing are better for you. I know what you mean something like this can put you on edge the whole time just waiting for it to kick off again.

Well done you

**Delly** · 25-04-2008, 01:32 PM

excellent news glad it has improved for you

**Splish Splosh** · 25-04-2008, 01:36 PM

glad it has got better and things have calmed down.

**miffy** · 25-04-2008, 03:07 PM

That's great news Debs - well done to you

miffy xx

**angeldelight** · 25-04-2008, 03:09 PM

So you seem to be sorting things out with the child and thats great that you have the parents support Debs

Well done with your ofted grade I bet you are glad that is all over now

Have a nice weekend

Angel xx