Settling in new mindee

**caroljayne** · 09-11-2009, 09:33 AM

I have had a new little one start boy 8mths - we had some initial settling in sessions with parents and started properly last week.

Just looking for some advice as he is very very clingy. He is ok when he is being cuddled but if I have to put him down for any reason he cries. Whilst I am happy to give him lots of cuddles and reassurance obviously I would like him to settle and have a little play :-) and also with other children here there are times when I have to put him down.

I have tried sitting on the floor with him on my lap with toys but he just cuddles in. Any advice?

**sarah707** · 09-11-2009, 10:29 AM

You just need to go through a very gradual process of leaving him to play for a few minutes... then a few minutes more... over weeks if that is what he needs you to do.

Some children find separation from adults very difficult but you cannot be expected to carry him on your knee all day.

At 8 months you might find a sling helpful if your back is up to it.

Having something close by that smells or reminds him of mum might be useful to.

This is a hard age anyway for separation anxiety so any help you can give him will pay dividends in the future.

**Tink** · 09-11-2009, 11:51 AM

You could also ask mum what she does, and see if he has some toys she could bring for him to settle him whilst he is at your house until he gets used to it

**youarewhatyoueat** · 09-11-2009, 01:00 PM

I find they sometimes feel more secure being higher up so they can see whats going on, I use a buggy but they can still be included in the activities, and then its easier for me if I need to use both my hands.

**caroljayne** · 09-11-2009, 04:14 PM

Thank you for sugestions - I think it is going to be a very long process.
I have spoke to mum & dad at length and they have told me they give him lots of cuddles at home, they cuddle him to sleep etc. so obviously this is what he is used to.

He brings a comforter and his own blanket and toys, in all my 18 years of childminding I have never had a little one so clingy. I keep telling myself at least he is contented whilst he is having cuddles :-) had six hours worth today!

The sling is a good idea - have got my eye on a couple on e-bay.