I'm so cross I could scream!!!!

**Kelly** · 20-02-2008, 06:25 PM

One of my LD is three in August so when her dad came to collect tonight I asked him if they had thought about what nursery they would use for her government funded sessions, he said that they had arranged to visit a nursery who only offer FULL DAY CARE on Friday. The said nursery failed there last Ofsted inspection and are now on special measures!!!!

I feel so let down, I have looked after there little girl since she was 8 months old, and I don't wish to blow my own trumpet but I am more qualified than any of the staff in that nursery. What has really upset me is they didn't even bother to sit down with me and ask which nurseries I would be prepared to drop off/pick up from.

My head is in a spin now, my throat has white spots all over (suspect I am getting tonsilitis!!!) and I am seriously ****** off!!!!!

Rant over!!!!!!!!!

**sarah707** · 20-02-2008, 06:27 PM

Ouch!

Have a good pillow bash then go lie down in a darkened room!

**Spangles** · 20-02-2008, 06:27 PM

Oh that's awful, I can totally understand why you are so mad.

It doesn't sound like they've thought this through properly.

Could you say to them about other nurseries and that you would be able to pick up from them and you'd love to continue her care if possible as she means so much to you? Maybe if you said how upset you were they would have a re-think?

Seems like a really stupid decision on their part.

**ajs** · 20-02-2008, 06:28 PM

aaaaaarrrrrrgggggghhhhhh

parents they are so thoughtless

that does sound like a dad comment though i bet mum would nver have put it like that he's probably got the wrong end of the stick anyway or i hope so for your sake xx

**miffy** · 20-02-2008, 06:36 PM

No wonder you're upset that was really thoughtless of dad

I'd have a chat with mum if I were you and see what she says

Hope you are not coming down with tonsilitis

Miffy xx

**Kelly** · 20-02-2008, 06:37 PM

Mandy

The unfortunate thing is, I do not think the mum would have told me!!!

The question is do parents ever give our feelings a thought? I think not!!!

**wendywu** · 20-02-2008, 11:03 PM

Not very caring parents, taking her away from a secure caring home and shoving her at the tender age of three into school for the whole day.

Do explain to these parents that she will see a constant change of staff. That they will not take her if she is under the weather or slightly ill. That she will not have outings or be part of a small knit group. Above all explain CONTINUITY OF CARE.

Go back on the list now and as soon as someone slse comes up give them notice.

You have 6 months to fill her place.

**Rubybubbles** · 20-02-2008, 11:07 PM

oh hun, sorry about this! Why would you send your child to someone that failed there Ofsted anyway? It makes no sence

**angeldelight** · 20-02-2008, 11:08 PM

Yeah im sorry too

Sounds mad to me

I would just go and scream really loud If I were you

xxx

**yummymummy** · 21-02-2008, 12:57 PM

Poor you Kelly, I think something similar will happen to me soon. After losing two children as mum has decided to resign as it is not financially worth it to her. Now my other childs mother has informed me that when she gets her 2.5 hr a day funding unless she can use it to pay towards me (which we all know that she can't) she will send her child who I've cared for diligently, who screams the place down when it's time to go home, who I watch like a hawk as she is allergic to virtually everything, who I've had special training to administer injections for for anaphylactic shock and who we all think of as a part of our family to day nursery!
Some parents really take the biscuit! Do you think that she will get all this attention in a day nursery. We have a massive group of day nurseries and the average age of staff is 17-18. Do you think they will be up to dealing with her. I think I'm more worried about it than mum.
It's hard not to become paranoid but I know I do a good job looking after the children and in fact the parents tell me how pleased they are and how happy their children are but it all comes down at the end of the day to cold hard cash!
Chin up something else will come along X

son77 · 21-02-2008, 01:12 PM

Do the parents know about the failed ofsted inspection?

Perhaps you could print the report out & give them a copy so they know what they are heading for?

**Kelly** · 21-02-2008, 02:14 PM

As it happens it does not effect my numbers to much as I had already had to apply for a variation for a new baby starting. It isn't about the money, I just cannot understand how they could send her to day nursery, she is such a lovely cuddly little girl, I worry how she will cope in that environment.

The family do know about the Ofsted report now because I suggested they go home and read it!!!!

**Schnakes** · 21-02-2008, 05:28 PM

I have a very similar situation - was told a couple of weeks ago that L would be going to x day nursery...so it will be cheaper for them cos they wont have to pay me while shes there!

A) Didnt ask if I would actually pick up from that nursery
B) Do they not read my P&P where it states that if Im doing drop off and pick up the whole time will be charged for???

Will be interesting when they start sending her, and expecting me to run round like a headless chicken for no money or thanks whatsoever!!! Cos yeah - Im really going to hold a full time space for a pittance each day!

Sx

**Heaven Scent** · 21-02-2008, 10:06 PM

I look after two children from the same family aged 3yrs girl and 15 mths boy, both are lovely children. I have them from 7.30 - 5.30 every day and have helped them through their daughters prolonged toilet training (I know I said in another thread that I am a fair weather potty trainer but that was mum to mum not childminder to childminder - we have to be led by what the awkward parents want).

Anyway the mum has went back to work full time in Oct having not worked for 3 years and told me she was on ICP course (so should have some insight). She and husband have degrees in science/medical field so are not dim and both have high paid responsible jobs and are doing loads of work to their new 1930's house. - Sorry for ramble just a bit of background into them. Dad drops off and picks up mum only appears when she has a question about fees or at least queries about if she really has to pay them all etc etc. - as I say should know better because of ICP course and not being dim etc.

To cut a long story short she asked me on first meeting if I would be willing to take girl to playgroup when she turned three as they were only my third enquiry and were for 2 full time spaces I said yes but said to book
early as I may end up getting a child who goes to another playgroup/nursery and then that would mess things up. I also explained that I had to be able to take my daughter to school on time and collect her and that on Wed's will have to take friends children to separate schools and nurseries until Mid- March.

Now I am having a family start 4 days per week and will be taking their 2 girls to playgroup and school in another part of town but they start and finish at different times but haven't said anything to first mum yet because haven't got contracts signed but once they are signed I will tell them.

Anyway the reason I'm mentioning this here is that I'm sure that parent 1 is expecting a discount for the 3 sessions her dd will be at playgroup but I have bad news for her because as they are full time they are on a special rate and once they come off that they would have to pay for two full days and hourly rate for the other 3 days which would come than if she continued paying me as we are and besides this because of ICP course she should know better.

She also asked me if I was any closer to being in receipt of nursery education grant - so had to inform her that Cheshire are dragging their heels on that one and I'm sure that they wouldn't give it to me in my first year of registration despite my past history and qualifications - they like to have the power.

All I'm trying to point out is that even bright educated people who have done the ICP course and should have some insite don't have any regard for our role.

By the way the mum had days off after christmas and still sent the children to me for 3 full days having told me they wouldn't be here because she was paying me while she was on hol, last week dad told me he was not going into work until late because he had to stay at home to meet a builder but still had both darlings at my house at 7.30 on the dot, then mum obviously recently had time off to visit 3 playgroups and didn't take her daughter with her on the visists nor did they drop them off later or pick up early so they could spend time with them. Dad says both kids go to bed as soon as they get home and for the past two weeks they came in the same clothes all week so rightly or wrongly this week I've made sure that they got dirt on them and didn't wipe it off and their chothes have been changed - naughty I know but they were all sticky and didn't smell too good also think kids only have a bath once a week I think its because the children have dry skin because the dad does shower in the mornings I only know this because of things he says happen while either parent is in the shower in the morning.

I appreciate that I am paid to have these children and therefore I shouldn't complain but if it was me things would be different (and it was I couldn't wait to spend every possible moment I could with mine when they were little I also hated rushing them out of the house in the morning and was thrilled when I had a day off or if their dad was off and I didn't have to drag them out of bed and rush them out of the house. I also feel quite upset by the fact that they are not totally honest with me I live in a small town and things always get back so total honesty and openess is vital.

So sorry for the long rant but its been annoying me and I needed to get it off my chest.

Celine

**crazybones** · 22-02-2008, 07:10 AM

The bit about being off work and still sending your children to be minded struck a chord with me. I walk past mindees house to take him to nursery every afternoon after him being with me in the morning and for 1 week both parents cars were there all week and this was during the really bad rain. One soaking wet day as I was trudging past absolutely soaking wet and their ds was walking next to the double pram soaked through also I looked through the window and they actually waved to us going past. I was going to wave back in a rather rude way. She must have felt guilty afterwards because she said "Oh we took the week off to do Xmas shopping without the kids". Fair enough I dont mind that but on that particular day you would think as they were actually in the house waving at me one of them would have come out and chucked him in the car and suggested I went back home and dried out with the babies.

Annie x

**Schnakes** · 22-02-2008, 08:41 AM

Oh yeah - thats the same as the little one I was on about yesterday - they are always having days off, and they NEVER have her at home, or even do pick up/drop off at more sleep-friendly hours. She also goes straight to bed when she gets home. Quite sad, really.

Sx

**wendywu** · 22-02-2008, 08:50 AM

NO they paid for it so they are dam well going to have it.

**devoncm** · 22-02-2008, 10:54 AM

I dont understand people who on there day off dont want to spend a little more time with there children, my partners ex takes there son to nursery at 8.30 in the morning and doesnt pick him until 6,she finishes work at 2.30 but still she leaves him there. she says it is so she can spend time with her 7 yr old daughter, which is understandable to want quality time separately with your kids but when does he get time with her, hes 3 1/2 and doesnt really talk and i think all his time at nursery doesnt help but she isnt with him enough to help him, when we have him he goes to nursery about 10.30 and we get him at 3.30 and he loves playing with my kids and the dogs and he is getting a bit clearer in what he says,if i had my way he wouldnt go to nursery when we have him but she wont let me look after him without his dad being here, my point being if the parent has the day off then surely they would like to take them to nursery or where ever they go

**yummymummy** · 22-02-2008, 11:29 AM

It's such a shame for these children. I think as childminders we sound like we are moaning about money or trying to get out of working hours we have been paid for. But it isn't that at all, one of the reasons most of us chose this profession (we think it is one, most parents do not!) so that we could spend as much time as possible with our own children as well as giving high quality childcare in a homely evironment to other children. It really upsets me when parents are home but they just seem to spend the time catching up with things rather than giving their children the unexpected treat of a lie in and a day of one to one quality time.
I know Kelly from your point of view its not about the money, but unfortunately from a lot of parents points of view that is exactly what steers them into making some of the decisions that they make.

**Kelly** · 22-02-2008, 06:01 PM

Two of my children (the LD in question) and another both always come on their parents days off!!! Both sets of parents (mum & dad) have been off on holiday this week and still arrived promptly and 7.45 and collected at 6.00, if the parents are paying for the childcare then they are having it whatever! It does mean that the ONLY time I ever have a day off is if I take unpaid holidays. I was saying to another childminder this week that I have always had 4 weeks holiday including Xmas, but if I had not taken holiday this Xmas I would not have had anytime off over the holidays because the parents would have still sent the children. I have had a really bad cold and a bit of tonsilitus this week, the parents could have said 'we know your ill, we'll keep *** at home' but no, that would be to much to hope for.....