What discipline do you use and when?

**youarewhatyoueat** · 22-04-2009, 08:46 PM

Really interested to know how you all discipline your minded children.

I've got a behaviour policy and I stress that I endorse positive praise etc. but i'm a bit vague on discipline as I mainly mind under 2's so tend not to have to do more than say the occasional "no" .

If you use the naughty step and time out do you do this with the blessing of the parents and is this decided before you sign the contract.?
How do you handle it if you don't agree with the way a parent disciplines their child and they ask you to do it?

Be really interested in your answers,thanks

Caroline

p.s I'm spending far too much time on this forum,but am finding it very useful,thanks everyone,wish some of you lived closer as it would be nice to know some other childminders,if it wasn't for this forum I would never speak to any other minders.

**sue** · 22-04-2009, 09:04 PM

Ofsted don't like naughty steps they want us to get them ingage in something else or sit near us l was pulled up on this at my inspection

**Tatjana** · 22-04-2009, 09:09 PM

I think if you call it 'time out' and not the 'naughty step/chair' it's more tolerated as if it's deemed to be a punishment rather than reflection it's humiliating for the child.

xx

**Hebs** · 22-04-2009, 09:11 PM

we have a reflection area

ofsted were happy with this

**westbrom44** · 22-04-2009, 09:35 PM

I have a 'thinking spot', which sounds like the reflection area.

I do the 1 minute for every year of their life and they are encouraged to think about what they have done. Then they are encouraged to say sorry.

I have hardly ever used it though!

I only use it if a child has deliberately hurt another child, and also if they understand. It would be pointless to use it on a child who is just 2, but most 3 year olds would understand.

Other than that I just encourage sharing, kindness, etc.

Parents are aware of my methods as it is in my behaviour policy. I am happy to discuss parents wishes.

**sarah707** · 22-04-2009, 09:39 PM

We have reflection time but they don't have to sit anywhere specific, they can just plop down wherever they were at the time.

They sit and think about how they are behaving and calm down as needed while I tend to the child who has been upset or pick up the pieces of whatever they have broken.

I talk to them as appropriate and ask how they might behave differently next time.

I do not ask them to apologise as i get children who dig in their heels then you are back to square one.

hth

**youarewhatyoueat** · 22-04-2009, 10:08 PM

Really like the 'thinking spot' and 'reflection time' great ideas thanks.
personally i've always hated the naughty step and time out as it's so negative and have never used it, but I do ask my own children to think about what they've done but had never thought to call it anything.
Will try it out next time!!! thanks

Caroline

**Chatterbox Childcare** · 22-04-2009, 10:20 PM

Originally Posted by sarah707

We have reflection time but they don't have to sit anywhere specific, they can just plop down wherever they were at the time.

They sit and think about how they are behaving and calm down as needed while I tend to the child who has been upset or pick up the pieces of whatever they have broken.

I talk to them as appropriate and ask how they might behave differently next time.

I do not ask them to apologise as i get children who dig in their heels then you are back to square one.

hth

I'm with Sarah on this one. Older ones I also ask "how would you feel if?" and this makes them address their own feelings and emotions. Usually works!

**mushpea** · 23-04-2009, 06:04 AM

it depends on the situation, if two children are fighting over a toy and cant agree to share then i take the toy away for a short time, if a child delibriatly throws his food/drink onthe floor ( hd this the other day) then i make them pick it up or wipe it up, if a child is using a toy in a destructive manner then i take it away.
I do use a time out spot for things like hiting etc if the child is old enough i speak to them about how they made the other child feel etc.
also when out if they keep running off or dragging behind me then i put on a wrist strap .
oh and somtimes take treats away like if we go to town and they behave on the way we go to the park if they misbehave they dont and if one is good and the other is not then when we get to the park the 'naughty' one has to sit on the bench with me for 5mins and miss some playing time.

**Dragonfly** · 23-04-2009, 07:06 AM

I think Id agree with mushypea,sounds a bit like me!!

**Daftbat** · 23-04-2009, 07:25 AM

I do a mixture of things that have already been suggested.

As far as the parent having a discipline method that i am not happy with - this needs discussing in depth at the first meeting when going through basic pols and porcedures. I would not do any discipline i am not happy with and if the parent and i could not agree a method then i am afraid i would not look after the child.