dispute with mum

**marjie b** · 26-03-2009, 11:26 AM

can anyone advise me??

been havin trouble with a parent who never wants to pay on time an im constantly chasin her 4 money

few weeks ago she became very rude an agressive towards me so i gave her notice to terminate her contract.

since then shes been much worse, swearin an callin me names in front of my kids and her daughter so yesterday after chasing her for money and gettin a mouth full i told her i wasnt willin to work under those circumstances anymore!! shes now told me shes reportin me to ofsted as i dont care 4 her child properly, its funny that as she never had a problem b4!!

im a bit worried as she is clearly a nasty piece of work an could say anythin about me but i refused to let her speak to me like that anymore!!! help....

**Pudding Girl** · 26-03-2009, 11:32 AM

Ofsted will not get involved in contractual disputes although they will have to investigate any other claims made, but seeing the history of this and the fact that she was clearly happy enough before, they would soon see it to be malicious.

She is trying to intimidate you into washing your hands of it and get out of paying. I don't think she seriously means to report you.

Hope you're ok x

**LittleMissSparkles** · 26-03-2009, 11:35 AM

sending you a massive hug hunnie , I would phone Ofsted myself and explaint he situation and circumstances around your terminating the contract and about her behaviour etc in front of the children, try not to worry as has been said it is about contracts they wont get involved unless she makes up things in which case you will be fine Im sure as it will all be unfounded xxxx

**SmartKids** · 26-03-2009, 11:38 AM

Keep a record in your complaints book/file. As said earlier you could telephone ofsted first just to make them aware of the situation. I doubt if she will call them though just calling your bluff. Good luck.

**marjie b** · 26-03-2009, 11:39 AM

thanks guys,

i just feel a bit worried as shes been so awful to me, im sure she will make up some rubbish about me!!

all i can do is wait an see if ofsted come to see me, im not too worried, all the kids are very happy here!

yesterday was awful tho, she was calling all the other children i mind for nasty names as they have learning difficulties, she really is a nasty woman, i felt really threatened tbh!!

Pipsqueak · 26-03-2009, 11:46 AM

take advice from NCMA

Terminate the contract NOW - citing her aggressive and intimidating behaviour towards you and in front of the children.

Log it all down

ring OFSTED and explain to them the situation and that she has now threaten you with a malicious complaint if you pursue your money.

Write the mother a letter -saying that you are invoking clause 25 (I think it is if not its 21) if you are using NCMA contracts, the situation is intolerable.
Tell her you have taken advice from NCMA and OFSTED and enclose a final invoice - payable by xxx date. If she does not pay you will pursue the monies through legal channels if necessary.

You mustn't allow this woman to treat you like this in your own home, or to allow your own children to be abused in this manner and for the safety and protection of other children in your care.

sounds like a really nasty piece of work

**katickles** · 26-03-2009, 11:54 AM

And another complaint purly as a parent won't pay their fees

It really angers me that parents think that this is acceptable!!!

Anyway - Ypu have already been given the advice on what to do, just wanted to send a hug & say not to worry about it. Ofsted will see through her complaint hun x

**childmind04** · 26-03-2009, 01:40 PM

Just wanted to send you a hug, do what the others have said and dont let this woman treat you like this no more

**Ripeberry** · 26-03-2009, 02:28 PM

Sending you hugs as well. Lots of good advise here. As for that woman calling S.N children names i bet their parents won't like it either

You don't have to put up with this behaviour from anyone.

**Roseolivia** · 26-03-2009, 02:31 PM

Poor you, don't put up with it and listen to the advice others are giving you. It's your home, why should you feel threatened in it.

**Demonjill** · 26-03-2009, 03:00 PM

I agree you def should NOT have to put up with this! She is obviously trying to scare you with Ofsted hoping you will let her off the money she owes you. Thats only 1 step away from blackmail really.
Stand your ground and like the others say phone ofsted yourself and explain the situation.
Hope you get it sorted soon.

**sue** · 26-03-2009, 09:17 PM

hope you get it sorted, its awful how some poeple turn when they are not getting their own way, don,t let her get away with it (big hug)

**angeldelight** · 27-03-2009, 12:05 AM

She sounds a nightmare

Hope you are ok and hope you get it sorted

Angel xx

**Mollymop** · 27-03-2009, 07:16 AM

Big hugs. I agree with all the advice. I hope you manage to get it sorted out and this woman stays out of your life for good and doesn't make malicious complaints about you. Keep your chin up, it will be ok. xxx

**gegele** · 27-03-2009, 08:32 AM

good luck. jusy sending you hugs.

**misst104** · 27-03-2009, 08:36 AM

She sounds HORRID

Have you managed to call Ofsted. I think that should be your priority xxx

Hope it gets sorted and you get your hard earned money

xxx

**Pudding Girl** · 27-03-2009, 08:42 AM

How are you getting on lovey?

**Helen79** · 27-03-2009, 10:07 AM

Sorry you're having to deal with this, she's sounds awful.

I would log everything that she says to you & any children.

Are you looking after her child again? Or is she coming to pay you money?
If so could you arrange for another childminder to be there when she comes so you have a witness & maybe she won't be as threatening with someone else there.

**marjie b** · 27-03-2009, 10:11 AM

thankyou so much chicks, its nice to have a few kind words when ur feelin down

just to let u know i called ofsted, told them it was a dispute that started over wages an they said in that case they wont get involved which we already knew anyhow....

tried to explain this woman had been particularly nasty an i feared she may make a complaint about somethin completely random just because we had words but the woman wasnt really interested, she said if there was an issue over the care of a child they would investigate an she couldnt tell me if a complaint had been made, however, she could put a note on my account to say there had been a dispute ova money....

im really peed off as i dont feel i deserve all this grief over money owed to ME!
she is a nighmare parent, she once came in an dragged her child out halfway thro tea because we were having CHIPS! THE CHILD WAS CRYIN AN THE MUM WAS SHOUTIN....
im best off outta it really, its the best decision i could have made, lets just hope her threats r empty ones eh??

thanks 4 the advice guys, much love, marjie moo xx