fat mindee

**flora** · 18-09-2008, 06:32 PM

I look after a lovely little girl after school and have done for the past two years.

Now calling a spade a spade she is now VERY FAT

She wasn't like this when she first came, I suppose it's over the last year that I have really noticed it.

When she is not with me they go every where in the car and go home from school via the village shop

stocking up on crisps or sweets

The main thing is she is getting far too big for some of the toys etc. Not because of her age but due to her size. To make matters worse I have another 6yr old who is llike a racing snake.

Sometimes I have to tell her to get off of things as they are creaking and moaning as she gets on. Trouble is the other 6yr old can get away with it as he is so small/ normal or whatever.

What do I do, ban them both and deprive the other child or just tell her she can't as she's too big as in too tall???????

She is wearing size 10/11yr old polo shirts to give you an idea of size and she is about 4ft.

Also big bruv is calling her a pig and calling her fat and despite chatting to mum I can't get him to stop

Any hints or tips?????

**breezy** · 18-09-2008, 06:39 PM

I know it's difficult but have you spoken to the parents? are the rest of the family big or unhealthy?

you could do lots of healthy eating activities etc but it sounds like she needs more help than that, to be honest i'm not sure what to suggest, i'm surprised school nurse or health visitor not aware

has it been checked she doesnt have medical problem?

sorry i cant help more maybe someone with experience of this can

**vix84** · 18-09-2008, 06:42 PM

Id handle it very carefully as you dont want to upset the poor child, and you may upset the parent too. Maybe you could do a few activities about positive healthy eating and exercise - you never know she may go home teaching her parents a thing or too.

As for the brother you need to set up some sort of boundary of 'we dont call people names in my home' and get the parents on board. Not sure how you will handle it - im sure someone else will be along soon with advice.

Maybe you could make 'Being Healthy' reward charts for all the children to take home, not just focusing on food and exercise - maybe include brushing teeth, walking to school, washing hands etc. Then they can take it home or you can have one for your house and one for them to keep.

**sarah707** · 18-09-2008, 06:42 PM

Is there any suggestion of a related condition which makes her steal food or is it just overeating?

If it is a condition, then she needs urgent medical help...

If it is overeating then she needs urgent dietician help.

It is child abuse to let a child get into that state and somebody (not you) needs to tell the parents.

I would speak with school ask if the nurse is involved.

Good luck xx

**flora** · 18-09-2008, 06:55 PM

I am not aware that she has anythign wrong with her not that I have been told anyway.

Mum and dad are not big especially just mum is a little overwieght. they both have in acticve jobs.
Think food is used as a treat they often turn up with choccie bars etc when they pick them up and I know mum is not a good cook.

She eats here every night and she is no prob to feed, she eats fruit and veg and fresh meat and her diet here is good. From what she has in pack up thats not too bad either. Up unitl end of term she was havign school dinners and they had to be mega healthy too.

Think it comes down to inactivity????

I do come down on her bruv and have raised it with mum, just not sinking in with him.

It is just so awkward as small guy can play on stuff that just isn't made to take her weight

**miffy** · 18-09-2008, 08:44 PM

Any chance of getting a couple of things that will take her weight so she doesn't feel left out?

Other than that the only thing is to keep talking to the parents and do some activities or have some information about healthy eating/exercise. I agree though it could be a touchy subject so tread carefully

Miffy xx

**kindredspirits** · 18-09-2008, 09:09 PM

i think you or someone needs to talk to mum about junk food..... could you perhaps put some of the ride on toys away when she's over?? i know its not fair on the other one but you don't want to make her concious it should be done subtly.

**brillminder** · 19-09-2008, 05:11 PM

i agree make a sweets treat day once a week thats a good suggestion , treats can be fruit too

**flora** · 20-09-2008, 08:17 AM

Originally Posted by miffy

Any chance of getting a couple of things that will take her weight so she doesn't feel left out?

Other than that the only thing is to keep talking to the parents and do some activities or have some information about healthy eating/exercise. I agree though it could be a touchy subject so tread carefully

Miffy xx

I have thought about that first, but the only thing that would really take her weight is a proper bike. Shencan't ride without stablisers yet and we only have a small bit of yard to ride bike on ok for the 2yr old not enough room for her

I have though about popping the toys away but I have four other kids who play with the stuff and just her that can't.

Don't get me wrong there is plenty to do for her outside, she's not sat on bench watching it's just three things she can't go on. Some days it just seems I am always asking her to get off.
Prob me over reacting as usual

**tara** · 20-09-2008, 09:04 AM

May be take them to the park alot and see if any one has a scooter or 2 you could use they take alot of energy.Then you could drop the hint to the parents that she loved it and she burn of lots of energy .I have a car but still walk my 6 year old to school and back rain or not she rides her scooter and loves it.Your in a very difficult situation its such a shame that you can see it but not her own parents.Good luck let us know how things go