4 year old boys!!

[primula]

Does anyone know how to stop 4/5 year old boys from playing 'killing games'??!! They are great kids but everything seems to turn into a bashing/smashing session! Even the 3 year old starting to join in now! I know that this is a common thing.. but I am running out of ideas!!

[FloraDora]

.....then give them dinosaurs!!

I find I can distract with problem solving tasks around water or building.

Lots of outdoor expeditions planning aswell.

We introduce the drums too at this point, with the electric guitar and amp....making music ...though noisy ...is far better than the dinosaurs killing everything in sight or attacking games.

Seems to work here.

Taking apart real things also distracts, but DH loves doing this so we have a bit of a stimulus.

[primula]

Thanks Flora dora, but they don't like dinosaurs!! Only superheroes!! But I will try 'the taking things apart' idea! Had thought of making a stuffed baddie like a guy we used to do for Nov 5 and let them whack that!

[singingcactus]

Super heroes don't kill, they arrest. Vigilantes kill, and supervillains kill, then superheroes then try to arrest the vigilante or supervillain. Tell them they are doing it wrong!



Get some comic books in for them to look at, and prove to them that superheroes protect others, and imprison the bad guys. They want to play superheroes, so let them, just give them the tools to do it right

[loocyloo]

Super heroes don't kill, they arrest. Vigilantes kill, and supervillains kill, then superheroes then try to arrest the vigilante or supervillain. Tell them they are doing it wrong!



Get some comic books in for them to look at, and prove to them that superheroes protect others, and imprison the bad guys. They want to play superheroes, so let them, just give them the tools to do it right

:-) :-) :-)
Quite agree. You worded it so much better than I could.

[FloraDora]

Thanks Flora dora, but they don't like dinosaurs!! Only superheroes!! But I will try 'the taking things apart' idea! Had thought of making a stuffed baddie like a guy we used to do for Nov 5 and let them whack that!

I didn't word that properly I meant I was agreeing with you and when you give them dinosaurs all they can do with them is fight and attack, which is equally irritating. I find myself saying the dinosaurs that we have are vegetarian ( we've even proved it by research) and gentle ....but all the dinosaurs you see in films are aggressive so that doesn't ring true to them!
I have a set of soft rubber dinosaurs that's mouths aren't open, they smile....but even they bash everything in play.

I once walked along a path in a park in Stratford on Avon at home time for the local private school, three lads were walking in front - about13 - and I was in my head thinking how well behaved and knowledgable they were as I overhead their chatter then suddenly one rugby tackled another and then the third piled in, all happy banter but physically bishing and bashing each other on the floor - it reminded me that boys do this!

Hence my creative thinking on making stuff and bashing with tools.

[FussyElmo]

Super heroes don't kill, they arrest. Vigilantes kill, and supervillains kill, then superheroes then try to arrest the vigilante or supervillain. Tell them they are doing it wrong!



Get some comic books in for them to look at, and prove to them that superheroes protect others, and imprison the bad guys. They want to play superheroes, so let them, just give them the tools to do it right

Exactly this Batman is well known for the fact he has never killed anyone. Why do you think he keeps facing the same villains 😂😂
If you do it comic books make sure they are suitable for the younger children though as they can be quite graphic 👍

[mama2three]

I find myself reminding the children that everyone has to be kind to each other at my house , and that includes the dinosaurs. If the dinosaurs cant play nicely they have to back in their box! TBH I rarely have this type of play , I try to just redirect anything heading in that direction. We did have a superheroes theme for a bit , the children made superhero rules , and it was all about helping / rescuing etc. Try putting a teddy up a tree , with a clue or 2 that maybe the villain was responsible.... how can the superheroes rescue him?

[BallyH]

I find they need exercising. Any opportunities to get them out and 'running'. In my experience boys play fight a lot. I have to plan my days with them doing physical things to exhaust that part of their brain before we can sit down to do something more calmer. But they will find anything to make a sword/cape with if you take their tools away. For some of them it is part of their makeup.

[singingcactus]

Exactly this Batman is well known for the fact he has never killed anyone. Why do you think he keeps facing the same villains 😂😂
If you do it comic books make sure they are suitable for the younger children though as they can be quite graphic 👍

If you get comic from the children's section of the newsagents stand they will be fine.
The comic books, and graphic novels that fill my own bookshelves are definitely not for little eyes haha. But regular comics from the children's section will be fine.

[singingcactus]

:-) :-) :-)
Quite agree. You worded it so much better than I could.

Hahaha, were you surprised to see me posting on a superhero thread loocyloo lol?

[FussyElmo]

If you get comic from the children's section of the newsagents stand they will be fine.
The comic books, and graphic novels that fill my own bookshelves are definitely not for little eyes haha. But regular comics from the children's section will be fine.

The last time I recommended comic books for a child the parent didn't check the content

[alex__17]

Not wanting to stereotype but rough play really is in their genetic makeup for some, my own son is 3 and has never seen a superhero cartoon or read a comic, has never seen a film or tv program with a roaring dinosaur in it to my knowledge, yet our dinosaurs are the loudest most vicious destructive things I've ever seen, every stick, bat, toy with a slight pointed end is a sword to poke or whack or destroy things with... And there's a very clear divide, only the boys seem to be so physical, the girls just aren't interested for long or at all, and I do everything I can do discourage the destructive play!
Love the idea of rescuing a teddy from a tree, we went through a fireman phase where he loved rescuing bath ducks j hid around the room, teddy in the tree sounds amazing (so simple!) and I'm sure would be played over and over and over :-)