Toilet Training

[jadavi]

I have a 3.5 year old girl who is well toilet trained when not here but regularly wets when she's at our setting despite us asking and putting her on the potty every half hour or so. Mum is getting really angry with her and has tried loads of incentive rewards / punishments etc and asking us to do the same. I don't think it's for attention. Mum thinks she's being lazy which is why she's so annoyed. I'm all for using a pull-up till she decides to toilet train at ours but am not prepared to have any more wet couches etc. mum now says if she wets she has to leave my setting that day and spend the day with her at her dress shop.
What do you all make of this and what would you do?

[blue bear]

Have you tried putting normal pants on and the pull uo over so she still feels wet but doesn't cover the carpets etc.

Totally desperate I once resorted to smarties, bought a box of mini smarties and put them in aot, for every success the lo could choose one smartie and so could every other child in the house. Child was not bought smarties for any other reason. It worked a treat as the other children would say, go for. A wee so I can have a smartie, other children asking worked far more effectively thanme asking. Only need the smarties for two weeks then everyone just forgot about them and lo was sorted and reliable

[jadavi]

Thanks

Yes have tried choc buttons and lots of other bribes.
Pants under pull ups is a good idea.

[watford wizz]

Getting angry will only make LO anxious and more likely to wet, just need to be calm consistent and kind, she's still only little. Lots of praise when she gets it right. Start with small targets, go back a few steps ie try potty every 20 mins and slowly extend, then set half day targets, sticker chart might help her to see her own progress. X

[hectors house]

Would child see going to stay at work with mummy as a reward or a punishment - where would she rather be, with mum or you? I would put a pull up over pants - child needs to feel wet to associate the cause with the action - it was far easier to potty train children back in the terry nappy dark ages! When my girls were potty training I used to go out with them in pants with the plastic pants (that you used for terry nappies) over them, in case of accidents - don't know if you can still get them?

[jadavi]

Sticker chart a good idea too thanks

I agree about not getting it a loaded situation but mum has chosen this route despite my advice .

It's strange that here is the only place she wets though ?

[jadavi]

Hector

Yes she would rather not ho with mum because she leaves her baby brother here if she has to go to mums shop and there's nothing for her to do there .

[jadavi]

This seems to be working!!

[smurfette]

Great stuff! What did you do different?

[jadavi]

I think she really believed she would miss out playing here . That's what we couldn't figure... She can do it if she want to.