can i ask parent about her hol plans??

[jaykay79]

one of my parents (the biggest earner) usually takes a certain week off in the summer (it's a festival thing we have where we live), problem is, she doesn't usually mention it until like a day or two or so before so I've no chance to makes plans myself i.e. take time off from the other kids as we are both, according to the contract, supposed to give 4 weeks notice but she NEVER does. she takes very little time off over the course of the year but when she does it's always at very short notice, so maybe on the Friday she'll say "oh X won't be back until Wednesday as we're having a few days off" so I don't know whether i'm coming or going, I don't know if she's booking hols at the last minute or deliberately not telling me till the last min to stop me making any plans myself (yes that is the kind of person she is). so this particular week in the summer she has always taken off, would it be ok for me to ask her is she planning on taking it off? she will definitely ask me why? what can I say/how can I phrase this? can I even ask at all? x

[jaykay79]

oh and also forgot to say... I would just book it off myself but I have already given her my hol dates for this year and she is panicking about how much time I've booked off (a whole week and a half!) so I am trying to accommodate her somewhat by trying to factor in some time off when she will be off x

[Rubybubbles]

Depends on how you charge I guess?

I ask for 4 weeks notice but parents pay for all their time off for holidays as I remain open. So I often get won't be in until ... I use the time to enjoy it quieter!!

If I want time off with no mindies at all then that comes from my holiday.

So I'm not really sure what you need to know so far ahead for is, unless you want to book time off yourself an want them still to pay? Depends on your contracts I guess

[Rubybubbles]

oh and also forgot to say... I would just book it off myself but I have already given her my hol dates for this year and she is panicking about how much time I've booked off (a whole week and a half!) so I am trying to accommodate her somewhat by trying to factor in some time off when she will be off x

Pah I take 6 weeks plus all bank hoilday! Just seen this so last bit of my reply done haha

[jaykay79]

I charge for parents holidays but not for mine, this isn't really about wanting to get paid time off though (although it would be nice lol) more about wanting a week off myself without her having heart failure at me having more time off x

[bunyip]

Yes, you can ask.

But then again, I'm getting old and grey and world-weary and seem to be completely out of touch with 'modern manners'.

Back in the old days, adults could ask one another just about anything (well, anything legal, decent, honest and truthful) without a fuss. There was a simple unspoken agreement that you could ask anything you like as long as you're equally prepared to take 'yes' or 'no' as an answer.

I'm clearly out of touch, cos these days it seems that you're "cheeky" for asking a straightforward question or "rude" if, when asked, you provide an answer that the enquirer didn't wish to hear. People are queuing up, desperate to take offence where none was intended (I blame soap operas . )

Nurse............. where's my pills?

[smurfette]

Could you just drop it into conversation., is it a music festival? Could you say oh I heard such and such is playing this year are you going to go? Still no guarantee she will actually go though, I find it better to book it off if I want it, but if you are worried cos she might complain about the amount of time you are having off just say, I am trying to make it easier on parents by taking time off when some of them are off anyway, are uou thinking of taking the festival week off
Cos I am thinking of taking a few days then

[jaykay79]

Could you just drop it into conversation., is it a music festival? Could you say oh I heard such and such is playing this year are you going to go? Still no guarantee she will actually go though, I find it better to book it off if I want it, but if you are worried cos she might complain about the amount of time you are having off just say, I am trying to make it easier on parents by taking time off when some of them are off anyway, are uou thinking of taking the festival week off
Cos I am thinking of taking a few days then

if I say it's cos I want to take some days off she'll be like "oh so you just want me to pay for yours days off then" lol, she is not backwards in coming forwards x

[dawn100]

It depends, I asked my main parent what her holiday plans are for Easter as was going to book a week off would co-ordinate with her if I could. She was happy as she knew as it was me booking the time off I wouldn't charge, happy client means when I book other days off I don't get grief from her.
So if you are happy not to be paid for that week, then you could ask her will she be having that week off as you will take that week off meaning she won't have to pay and it won't inconvinience her. But if you are asking but still expecting her to pay then she might not take it too well.
But how do you manage with just 1 1/2 weeks holiday? I book 4weeks in as the start of the year and then take up to another two weeks as odd days giving at least 4weeks notice but normally at least a couple of months.
I bet she wouldn't be happy if her work made her feel guilty about taking more than a weeks holiday!

[jaykay79]

very diplomatic dawn I like it! x