bitten more than I can chew!!!! what can I do?

**Boo_Bear** · 04-09-2013, 12:36 PM

Hi I need advice again! I have just taken on 2 boys for a couple of hours a day but they terirous my daughter I cant let her play on the floor as they stand on her, she hates being in the jumperoo as she finds it boring and she gets pulled around by the others. I have 5 children including my own.
8yrs, 7yrs, 3yrs, 14mths and mine 9mths. I just dont think I can have the two new ones as there isnt alot I can do except keep my daughter on my lap. I sit with them and try and play but they are all over the place u should see my house its like a bomb has hit it the toys are all over the floor and the more I tidy it the more they get out but I am having to do this with my daughter in my arms. I put the toys in areas and let them play. What can I do.. I am thinking of giving up all together or to just give up the two new ones as in October I will have 6 children 3 at school and 3 at home. Help!!!!!

**christine e** · 04-09-2013, 12:53 PM

Think you know what you need to do - give notice if you are not happy

**Helen79** · 04-09-2013, 01:05 PM

Is it the 3 year old and 14 month old that are causing the problems? I wouldn't give notice just yet, give them a few weeks to get used to the new rules at your house. I would put most of the toys away and just get 2 boxes out at a time so they can't cause so much destruction. I find if there's too much choice then they don't stick at one activity and just go round pulling stuff out and not playing with it.
How are you dealing with their behaviour when they are pulling your dd about? Maybe you need to be a little bit firmer with them so they learn that it isn't acceptable.

can you set up a table each session with an activity away from your dd so they are kept occupied up and away from her space. Sensory play keeps toddlers entertained for hours at our house. If you do things like rice crispie play then your dd can sit up with you and join in too.

Is there anyway that you can split your room up so you can make a baby friendly area that they aren't allowed in so your dd can play and then have their own space to play?

You don't have to divide your room up with a playpen or anything so your dd feels left out, things like play tents and rugs can divide the area up so it feels like they have their own separate play areas.

**Samantha_j41** · 04-09-2013, 03:20 PM

Be firm with them, its a new place for them and all new toys. They want to see them all.

Put all the toys out the way apart from the cars for example , and they play with them for the day and swap toys each time. As for your little one i would sit the kids down and explain to them shes a baby and they have to be gentle, be firm.

Its a new place and new people let them have time to get used to it, although 5 kids isnt easy!

**Boo_Bear** · 04-09-2013, 03:48 PM

Hi ya. I have set the room out into 2 sections, by having 2 lots of toys or one toy box and one activity but they seem to be tipping everything out all over the place. If I am honest I think its all new to the younger ones, so I have tried to explain to them about my daughter but at 14months and 3yrs they kinda dont get it. But I will keep going with it. The older two seem to play up when we have visitors I am not sure why but we have talked about it and they have promised me they will start behaving for me. I guess 6wks is a long time for me and for them.
My house isnt big enough for them to be separate from my daughter, I set up a soft area for her but that lasts 2 mins.
I have set down ground rules and I guess 5 is alot of children so going to see how we go when older ones are at school and take it from there.
Im too soft and want an easy life and give in I now need to be harder on them when it comes to rules as ive only had 2 before and after school till summer holidays when I increased my numbers. So they got alot more attention and allowed to do more.
So tonight I will be writing down the rules for all to see.
Thanks for the ideas I will use them, but will see how I go with 5 children and give them time to settle in I guess. Xx

**emma04** · 04-09-2013, 03:53 PM

Don't give notice. Get tough on them!!! They are new and will test boundaries so give them some!!!

I wouldn't tolerate that behaviour and they would know it in an instant!

Part of our job is to ensure that children are able to be accepted socially and this means teaching them how to behave around others and to be respectful.

This must start from day one or you'll end up bald!!

**kellyjef** · 06-09-2013, 07:52 PM

I am feeling the same as you. I have a 2 and five year old since june. They were looked after by someone before so not shy when they started with me but lately the younger one has been hitting, screaming not sharing they both dont listen to me. They hit my little one during the day and when their parents are around my little one hits back mum acts as if the children are angles. When parents come to pick them up they run in my childrens room going crazy kick bite and pull parents hair. All the other children i look after make me so happy.

**Boo_Bear** · 06-09-2013, 08:28 PM

I just think the parents want to believe their child is perfect. I have no problems with the older two when the younger ones arent around. And since the older ones have been back to school my life has got so much easier they are easier to keep entertained as I am only splitting myself three ways with the younger ones.
I feel alot better now just not looking forward to next holidays lol.

Also does anyone else have this problem I have said to mum many times I need more notice but she says its her works fault. But the older ones go home at 5pm and at 4.30pm I get a txt from mum saying she will be late and it will be after 6pm, then she puts is that ok just I have to stay on at work? How the hell can I say no thats not ok when I know it takes her 30mins to get back from work. Ive told her I need more notice than 30mins, but she says her work only seem to ask when she is ready to leave.

**kellyjef** · 06-09-2013, 08:51 PM

I dont have this problem yet but i do not think its fair on you. If a nursery shuts at 5 then mum would have to pick up at 5. I know it is a home setting but its still a work place and she should change her pick up time.
Its not fair on the children my little ones know after dinner mum or dad comes if they are late it really unsettles them.

**caz3007** · 06-09-2013, 08:52 PM

I would make it quite clear to her that this is unacceptable and her work need to understand that she has children and you need more notice. I used to work in Tesco when my older two were in small and used to just say no if asked to stay late as I had to get back for the children. What if it wasn't ok and you had something planned. I reckon you will only have to say no a couple of times or that you are closing at 6 so she needs to be there by then.