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problem with parent.
Hi. I have posted on here before about one of my parents. I deal with the dad alot more than the mum, first time parents to an 8mth old baby. They are quite fussy about baby and I feel everything has to be just so.
She always texts me late in the evening, am I wrong to reply at this time of day?
On Thursday I have x until 3.30 but mum asked me last week if I could have her late so I said yes but my own children have an eye test and I really didnt want to cancel it so said I could take x with me and drop her off home on way home, mum then said she would get someone to pick her up at 3.30 and would this fit? I said no sorry, doesnt give me enough time to pick girls up and get them to appointment.
She then said 'between the two of us when have we had a normal week? :/ ' and x will have to come as that's the only option. I just replied I would cancel appointment.
I feel like she doesnt think I have a life apart from x. I have her 3 days at the mo and in sept they are dropping her down to 1 day and im just really questioning whether this is working.
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Some people think we don't have a life. I have the same issue. I would not bother, it will only get worse.
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It sounds like you are bending over backwards for mum and she is dictating your business.
I must admit I have had a problem with one parent always asking to change days and swap days, basically ignoring my fees policy of paying when mindees don't attend. I've caved in, in the past but I have manned up recently because she was starting to take the mick.
Good luck
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Originally Posted by
Npg1
Hi. I have posted on here before about one of my parents. I deal with the dad alot more than the mum, first time parents to an 8mth old baby. They are quite fussy about baby and I feel everything has to be just so.
She always texts me late in the evening, am I wrong to reply at this time of day?
On Thursday I have x until 3.30 but mum asked me last week if I could have her late so I said yes but my own children have an eye test and I really didnt want to cancel it so said I could take x with me and drop her off home on way home, mum then said she would get someone to pick her up at 3.30 and would this fit? I said no sorry, doesnt give me enough time to pick girls up and get them to appointment.
She then said 'between the two of us when have we had a normal week? :/ ' and x will have to come as that's the only option. I just replied I would cancel appointment.
I feel like she doesnt think I have a life apart from x. I have her 3 days at the mo and in sept they are dropping her down to 1 day and im just really questioning whether this is working.
Sorry bit confused ha ha
Do you mean the baby finishes at 3.30 .. she asked if you could have her later but because you had an appointment she decided to ask if someone else could pick up at the usual time of 3.30? But you said no?
Had you changed the babies times and told her in advance that you would not be able to work till your normal time
Sorry it is late and I am tired maybe I am reading this wrong?
Angel xx
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Thanks for your kind words. I do feel like I bend over backwards for her, I used to worry so much about doing the right thing but now I just think I will do it my way. My other mindees parents are so relaxed. To top it off we are moving in 2 weeks time and this parent has been particularly fussy about drop offs and pick ups when all I have ever done is put the chikd first, we move on the monday and mum still wants me to have her on the tuesday because I go on holiday the following week so I cant possibly take anymkre time off. Arghhh! Sorry!
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Originally Posted by
angeldelight
Sorry bit confused ha ha
Do you mean the baby finishes at 3.30 .. she asked if you could have her later but because you had an appointment she decided to ask if someone else could pick up at the usual time of 3.30? But you said no?
Had you changed the babies times and told her in advance that you would not be able to work till your normal time
Sorry it is late and I am tired maybe I am reading this wrong?
Angel xx
This is the way I'm reading it too
If you have baby till 3.30 what difference does it make if someone else was To pick up?
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Haha! No. I normally have baby until 3.30 but she asked me to have her until 5pm so I said yes but my children have an appointment so can take x with me, thats when it got confusing with pick up times and she wanted to pick her up early.
At first she said for me to take her but not let her have an afternoon sleep so she sleeps in car/ buggy. I have now said I will cancel appointment x
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Originally Posted by
Npg1
Haha! No. I normally have baby until 3.30 but she asked me to have her until 5pm so I said yes but my children have an appointment so can take x with me, thats when it got confusing with pick up times and she wanted to pick her up early.
At first she said for me to take her but not let her have an afternoon sleep so she sleeps in car/ buggy. I have now said I will cancel appointment x
So your appointment was later than 3.30 so you offered to take baby with you so you could have him until 5pm?
Got it now ha ha
Well you offered so I would def not have changed my children's appointment
Angel xx
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Sorry see what u mean. She asked me last week to have x until 5pm thurs and I said yes then realised my children had an appointment so text her right away but she has only just text me to ask if her mum can pick x up at 3.30 but I said it wouldnt give me enough time and offersd that I could take her or cancel the appointment, it was up to her
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Originally Posted by
Npg1
Sorry see what u mean. She asked me last week to have x until 5pm thurs and I said yes then realised my children had an appointment so text her right away but she has only just text me to ask if her mum can pick x up at 3.30 but I said it wouldnt give me enough time and offersd that I could take her or cancel the appointment, it was up to her
I'm still confused lol doesnt take alot lol
But if normal pick up time is 3.30 for baby don't understand what prob is as I say I'm blonde haha
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So you are not happy because you tried to help and she has changed her plans at short notice
Leaving you to cancel your children's appointment is that right?
I would not have cancelled it
We live and learn though so next time be a bit tougher
Hope your house move goes ok and you have a good holiday , if you book time off in advance she seems the type who will moan but make sure you still have what you need.
Angel xx
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Haha. Because I need to leave before 3.30 for the appointment (thinking I would have x until later so wouldn't be a prob) so I wouldn't be here at 3.30 for someone to pick her up!!!!
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Originally Posted by
supermumy
Okkkkk I get it u booked appt after she said work late till 5
Told ya I'm blonde haha
Well in that case I wouldn't of cancelled appt
Both of us blonde but think we got there in the end ha
Angel xx
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I think you know the answer.
Bye Bye Baby.
If the situation is making you feel uneasy or is having a negative impact on you or your family, It's not worth the hassle or aggro, life is too short.
Your moving house is an ideal opportunity to end the contract and it will only get worse, save yourself a few grey hairs.
GOOD LUCK
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I love my friends who live inside my laptop
xx
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Hi everyone. Still having problems with this parent. Its stressing me out, had baby 3 days a week and in sept dropping to 1 day a week so thinking is it worth it as I have other children starting.
Nearly every day she texts me to ask me something or make a remark, heating food up, changing nappies, the list goes on.
We move house tomorrow and she wants to pop round tomorrow at 5pm to see the house!!! Doesnt want me to take tuesday off so I have to get everything sorted tomorrow. I said no sorry. She seemed ok but its all the time
Advice please
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I think you have three choices here.
1. Ignore the silly comments
2. Have a meeting and explain how you feel and what you need changed
3. Serve notice
I think you know #1 isn't an option, so that leaves #2 & #3, you can try #2 & move on to #3 if needs be, or go straight to #3, but only you can decide that.
What ever happens, you have to do something!
Hope the new house is lovely!
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Don't let the bad karma into your new home, it will ruin it for you.
You owe it to yourself to be respected. I had a parent similar and the endless chipping and pointless comments are pathetic and wear you down and I was constantly be on edge even though I new I was doing a very good job.
If you don't believe it will change or if you don't want to carry on - don't - it's your life and your business.
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