New baby - ideas please.

[TooEarlyForGin?]

One of my 2 yo's mum, has just had a baby. LO was already quite "hard work" and already I can see issues arising. Do you do anything in particular to help the transition of new siblings?

[Rick]

One of my 2 yo's mum, has just had a baby. LO was already quite "hard work" and already I can see issues arising. Do you do anything in particular to help the transition of new siblings?

Similar situation. I mind two sisters and older sibling gets quite jealous if I do anything with younger sibling; give milk, play with etc. Even if she is happy doing something else, she will come over and muscle her way in so she gets the attention. I've found the best way is to involve them both in whatever we are doing. If I'm feeding LO I'll ask older sister if she wants to hold the bottle etc. That way she doesn't feel left out and has nothing to feel jealous about. Similar to you, older sister is "hard work" but even more so when younger sister is around. When she is having a nap, older sister is much easier to deal with so that tells me it's definitely a jealousy thing.

I presume mum has asked you to have LO in due course?

[TooEarlyForGin?]

Yes, the baby is already booked in.

She screams a lot when she doesn't get her own way, and I know mum and dad give in quite quickly, she had just started to get used to the fact screaming at me doesn't work, but it has come back with a vengeance, if I ask her to get her shoes on to go out, she will either immediately break down, screaming don't want to, then demands i put her shoes on, when I ask her to at least get them for me, more screaming. If she wants something, and I say no or later, again screaming, if I give her a sandwich for lunch, cue more screaming for something different. I really like her and she's a brilliant character, and I am sticking her out as much as possible, but am also aware she isn't adjusting very well to the new arrival. I'm not worried about speaking to mum and dad at the moment as I know they have their hands full, I was just wondering if anyone else has had a similar issue and found a good way to deal with it (apart from ear plugs).

[lubeam]

Firm and fair , you no the cause and as you've said parents are a push over just be firm with your rules and maybe a little more on it for a few weeks and she'll come round , I always just ignore the fact that there's a sibling - your justifying the behaviour it's not acceptable , end of ! More of the same the only difference this time is you no why, lo probley doesn't ! Lol ,
Keep doing what your doing it WILL pass , good luck it's never easy when a change throws lo's outta wack x

[Rick]

Yes, the baby is already booked in.

She screams a lot when she doesn't get her own way, and I know mum and dad give in quite quickly, she had just started to get used to the fact screaming at me doesn't work, but it has come back with a vengeance, if I ask her to get her shoes on to go out, she will either immediately break down, screaming don't want to, then demands i put her shoes on, when I ask her to at least get them for me, more screaming. If she wants something, and I say no or later, again screaming, if I give her a sandwich for lunch, cue more screaming for something different. I really like her and she's a brilliant character, and I am sticking her out as much as possible, but am also aware she isn't adjusting very well to the new arrival. I'm not worried about speaking to mum and dad at the moment as I know they have their hands full, I was just wondering if anyone else has had a similar issue and found a good way to deal with it (apart from ear plugs).

Very similar to my 3yo mindee except not quite so much screaming, just a lot of complaining! As I say she is worse when her sister is around so it's a jealousy, attention seeking thing. If she is being particularly over the top moaning and I have tried to reason with her and involve her in what we are doing as a group, I don't pander to it, I ignore it or distract her with something else. I want to show that that behaviour won't get her anywhere and she has got a little better recently. Same as you, I think she gets her own way at home and it makes it difficult when with me.

[Optimalstar]

I'd make being the 'big' boy/girl something special. We're going to do x because you're the big one. (Baby) can't do this because they're too little. So baking, planting or whatever you think the older will enjoy but is obviously only for 'big' boys/girls.

[Optimalstar]

That's what I've done in the past with my own children and family members( nieces/ nephews). Not been childminding long enough to have had this issue x

[TooEarlyForGin?]

I'd make being the 'big' boy/girl something special. We're going to do x because you're the big one. (Baby) can't do this because they're too little. So baking, planting or whatever you think the older will enjoy but is obviously only for 'big' boys/girls.

Doing this, but it seems she wants to be babied again, we were started to go towards potty training, based on her being a big girl, but she has regressed.

I'm sure it will all be fine, I think it's just going to be quite hard work.