Why do I bother

[phoenix2010]

been looking after a little girl , she comes 4.30 pm til 9.30pm

shes been coming for a year

she was painfully thin at the start and mum says she has the appetite of a mouse

even school were worried how little she eats

Anyway have been working on building her appetite

Mum agrees not to feed her after school and I bring dinner forward to 4.45

Shes been clearing her plate every night for the last few months , physically looks so much better , has gained weight , and really enjoys her food now

so tonight she comes , I serve dinner and shes pushing it around the plate like she used to

I asked her when did she last eat , she says Mum gave me 2 donuts just before I came round FGS!!!

a) why would you do that when shes doing so well
b) why not tell me so I can give her dinner at 6pm and she might actually eat it

I feel like Im swimming through custard some days

[Petshrinklj]

Argh I feel your frustration. Sounds like you'd done really well with her too.
Two donuts for a child before a meal that's ridiculous.

[shortstuff]

has the mum lost the plot? I feel your pain x

[Maza]

One donut would be bad enough, but two? Why has she even got them in the house? x

[phoenix2010]

I know and she was only saying the other day how great it was that she was looking so much better
and eating a normal sized meal for her age

personally I have a feeling guilt plays a part here , child is at school all day , mum sees her for one hour then has to go to work

I suppose in that hour she is going to be tempted to treat her , but i think she could think of something better than spoiling her dinner

[clareelizabeth1]

Funny how food is seen as a treat. Playing with them would be a much better treat.

[Stapleton83]

Poor little soul just when she was doing so well with you, still look on it as a blip and tell mum what the outcome was perhaps it will discourage her from doing it again.

Samx

[Kiddleywinks]

Maybe mum thinks the 'troubles' are behind her now that LO is eating better

Well done to you though for getting this far

[Daisy De]

Sounds like you have worked wonders, well done. Hopefully just a one off with the donuts.

[phoenix2010]

well when mum picked up she actually asked , did lo eat her dinner ?

I said well only a little , probably becasue she had donuts before she came

I think mum was expecting that answer

so she said well she was starving so I said she could have one and give one to your son , but i turned round and she ate them both

this child was crashing and burning at 7 o clock last night , which is really unusual for her and I suspect its cus she had a sugar rush about 4pm then hardly any dinner !!

Anyway , have asked mum to let me know if she gives her something in future and Ill give her dinner later , maybe 6 and hopefully she will eat more

mum agreed , so hopefully it was a blip

thanks for the replies , I was wondering if I was making a big thing out of nothing , but its taken a lot to get this far and it means a lot to me

[newbie]

I can totally sympathise! I have a LO that arrives here early in the morning either eating chocolate or crisps!!! I then can't get breakfast down his throat which really makes me cross!!! It's just not necessary to give LO those sorts of things at 7am!!

[phoenix2010]

thats disgusting , and will lead to all kinds of problems with food later

my son is 6 and only has chocolate , cake , crisps , any treat foods on weekends

in the week he eats cereal or toast , sandwiches and fruit for lunch , cooked dinner and yogurt for dessert

he doesnt feel like hes missing out on anything and has a really good attitude to food

I do let him eat cake for breakfast on his birthday , its kind of a family tradition lol

[shortstuff]

thats disgusting , and will lead to all kinds of problems with food later

my son is 6 and only has chocolate , cake , crisps , any treat foods on weekends

in the week he eats cereal or toast , sandwiches and fruit for lunch , cooked dinner and yogurt for dessert

he doesnt feel like hes missing out on anything and has a really good attitude to food

I do let him eat cake for breakfast on his birthday , its kind of a family tradition lol

can i have my next birthday at your house please?

on a sensible note it seems like you are teaching a healthy relationship with food, well done x

[phoenix2010]

well last night she had had half a slice of cheese on toast at home with mum and didnt want dinner

I asked her throughout the evening if she wanted something and at 8pm she decided she was hungry Grrr
I gave her a slice of toast , small bowl cereal , half an apple , and some raisins

I suspect she is going to convince mum to give her something after school every day now to avoid eating a proper dinner

what a shame

I talked to mum and said that Im not very happy about her avoiding eating dinner with the other children then needing food at 8pm when we need to be thinking about her going to sleep

mum said that she comes home from school really hungry , which I understand but I have brought dinner forward to 4.30pm for this child , so she only has to wait a little from getting home to coming to my house

shes picked up from school at 330 and by the time she gets home its 345 , she is dropped off to me at 430 , where her dinner is waiting , is it really too much to ask to make her wait 45 minutes ?

when she waits she has been wolfing down a home cooked meal

so we are back to snacking and avoiding meals , unless Mum can get her act together , really not happy