Dear DH.....

[emma04]

Dear DH,

Although you are on annual leave and want to keep out of the way (upstairs) whilst I am working, I would like to remind you that you have two children of your own at home today and, unless you are deaf, i'm sure you can hear them both playing me up something chronic downstairs.

Therefore, please could you spare a moment to get off your lazy backside and come and sort them out before I walk out of the front door and don't come back!!

Regards

DW



Honestly, I swear that man thinks ***** mind all of the children in my care and that it means he has no need to help out with his own two dd's!..............Give me strength!!

[shortstuff]

OOOOOhhhhh i feel for you, i really do. Good luck telling him what for later

[Rick]

My DW is very good actually. She is now on maternity leave and will take DS out or come with us to play group to give me a hand with DS.
You just have to gently (or otherwise) remind him of his responsibilities!

[funemnx]

Oh I feel for you! My DH has been off (using up his hols before end March) for pretty much the last 3 weeks. I have been working full on (very bad cold last week) and STILL cooked dinner every night AND washed up and cleaned the kitchen. We have no small children of our own..... I could have said something, but why should I have to!

[Roseolivia]

I could have wrote this myself. My dp is self employed so quite often comes home through the day, goes upstairs to think (lay his a*** on the bed in his dirty work clothes) and then ignores my 2yr old screaming for him . He then wonders why i bang around whilst he's trying to rest.

[step11]

I have the same problem! Makes me want to pack it all in if I'm honest. Really behind on everything.

[The Juggler]

now Emma you know what to do. print off what you just wrote, fold it, pop it in an envelope and deliver it under the door of whichever room he's hiding in.

let him know how you feel honey

[RuthJ]

Sounds familiar

[Mice and Toad]

I am glad (sorry) that everyones lazy good for nothing is just as bad as mine.

[hectors house]

I would give him a choice - either do a list of chores/DIY/gardening or take your children out for the day - I do this with my daughter "do you want to peel the potatoes or walk the dogs" I know she won't walk the dogs but at least I get some help. Good luck!

[primula]

Just be direct and say what it is that you want! dont expect him to guess, you will wait forever!! You will feel better too!

[Houlgated]

i get this frequently. just today DH was sat on his **** whilst our 2 year old was in the loo (without a window) asking for someone to turn the light on as he cant reach, DH started yelling at our 5 year old to turn the light on and when she refused he got annoyed with her saying she was not being very kind and should help her brother...i pointed out that what she was doing was just as important to her to stop what she was doing to help as it was for DH to stop sitting on his **** to help his son out. i do think that the parent who is not usually with the children just don't have a clue how much or what the rest of us do on a daily basis.

[FizzWizz]

Oh my goodness, I thought that just happened in my house :-) it drives me absolutely mad!!! My dd can be screaming place down with mindees present and dh retreats to garage!

I Still don't say anything though but having realised from this thread that I'm not being totally unreasonable I think I will next time!

[FussyElmo]

Just be direct and say what it is that you want! dont expect him to guess, you will wait forever!! You will feel better too!

Agree my dh always say if I want him to do something then to ask as he will never guess correctly.
I also find on my busiest night dh will get out of the way as he is usually in my way its easier in the summer and we are outside as he enjoys that but doesnt see the point in crafts etc.

And remember most people are not mindreaders so they have to be asked!!!

[MessybutHappy]

Golly, I'm lucky! Mine is mostly ok, sometimes the"traffic was bad" but mostly he'll come home to take some of the load off me, and will always if I ask him to...but I am brutally honest with him and so said before I started that it wasn't a licence for him to stop parenting!!!

[loocyloo]

mine is quite good - the mindees all love him ( and him them ) for the few minutes at the start & end of each day that he sees them !!!

but when he is home for the day, he doesn't 'get' that i can't just stop & sit down for a cup of tea, or a chat! that its not quite like having our own children who just go off and do their own thing ( ours are older too! ) he does do a fair bit of running around after our own children though - more now that we have moved, and he gets home earlier plus ( which i think is more to the point! ) the children are getting older, and their activities later and so he CAN do more!

he will also ask me to pop out and get XYZ ... but is getting much better at NOT asking !!! he did half suggest that whilst i was in the post office i could get some euros for our trip away ... but when i said i wasn't planning on going to the post office he said he could get them!

[Boris]

I must be one of the lucky ones. My DH was off last week and did spend a lot of time playing with mindees, took our DD food shopping, picked DS up from school and cooked meals. He is sometimes a lazy s*** but he does try hard!

[skatie]

First day my DH has had time off whilst I've been minding and he really surprised me. He usually only takes direct orders but today used his initiative and helped set up ice play 'north pole'. Made friends with my super shy mindee. And helped put coats, shoes on when we went out, put double buggy in car and strapped lo's in. Perhaps this was only because he was happy to see us go so he could have some peace and quiet. He did keep joking that he couldn't see why it was such a hard job... This said from his bum in chair position (where it had been most of the day). Ha, so funny.... Not!