Advice

[handeme]

Afternoon

I have a two year old minded who is being a bit of a monkey at the moment.

I know its probably an age thing but just wanted a bit of advice about how to help both myself and the parents through it.

Here is an example of what he is like.

When said child arrives if there is another minded child her whilst he is still in his parents arms' he will growl and the mindees' shout and scream. If the parents put he down he goes for them, this morning we had a scuffle.

He battles with anyone and everyone, has tantrums and screams like no other child I have ever heard.

These are just a couple of examples.

Mum has commented on how is behaviour is awful and others around them have commented on it too. We tried a chart for potty training but he lost interest in it and in fact he still isn't trained' dry and home with no pants on.

[Pipsqueak]

Rightly as you say, you and parents need to work to together and this needs to be nipped in the bud immediately..

Can you get the other mindees to stay out the way when you open the door to circumvent the growling and attack? Or can you do a handover quickly.

If child does the growling I would ignore and carry on with handover - keeping other children out the way and keeping this child at a safe distance.
Handover (quickly), keeping hold of the child, ignoring behaviour, get coat off...

if child manages to 'attack' then a swift firm 'no' etc....

re the potty training - sounds like he isn't ready and i would forget that for a while and get this behaviour under control

[handeme]

I have tried to keep the other children away but the quite often come at the same time and they are generally happy to see him, so if they are already here they rush in excited.

I tried sitting them down for breakfast strapped in the booster seats but he even does it then and totally disrupts breakfast.

I agree with you on the potty training but the parents remain adamant that he is to be trained. Sometimes just getting him to sit on the potty before we leave the house turns into one big battle.

[Pipsqueak]

I have tried to keep the other children away but the quite often come at the same time and they are generally happy to see him, so if they are already here they rush in excited.

I tried sitting them down for breakfast strapped in the booster seats but he even does it then and totally disrupts breakfast.

I agree with you on the potty training but the parents remain adamant that he is to be trained. Sometimes just getting him to sit on the potty before we leave the house turns into one big battle.

Do you think child is doing it for effect in front of parents or you? Has he has a reaction to this that has got him attention?

With regards the growling I would probably ignore and talk loudly over him and have 'lots of jolly fun' and say oh X is saying hi to you *growler* - see if you can say hi nicely... oh well done..
With regards the 'attacking' I would keep a VERY firm hold of him



most people have screamers.. you have a growler.....

(mind you i am having problems with saying that... my friends husband calls her lady bits a growler...!!!

[handeme]

Do you think child is doing it for effect in front of parents or you? Has he has a reaction to this that has got him attention?

With regards the growling I would probably ignore and talk loudly over him and have 'lots of jolly fun' and say oh X is saying hi to you *growler* - see if you can say hi nicely... oh well done..
With regards the 'attacking' I would keep a VERY firm hold of him



most people have screamers.. you have a growler.....

(mind you i am having problems with saying that... my friends husband calls her lady bits a growler...!!!

ha ha growler, my hubby calls pork pies growlers.

This morning he did his growling with blowing raspberries in between, my other minded laughed so wasn't bothered by it but it did discourage him from doing it x

[VeggieSausage]

I agree with what has been written about nipping in the bud with this immediately and what you are doing in every aspect needs to be looked at and see how you can change the routine to try and get him out of these bad habits.

I would
1. Make an appointment with parents asap to discuss behavioural issues and explain you need to work together to sort these out as you have a duty of care to the other children in your care and they should not be physically attacked, scared or feel intimidated by any other child in your care.
2. I agree potty training has to go until his behavioural issues are sorted - you cannot do both
3. Ensure parents are reinforcing that growling is not acceptable and from their end they telling him no.
4. Has he got siblings?....how does he behave towards them?
5. Keep hold of him and he will need to stay with you at all times
6. I think do drops off when the parents come in with him and let them see the extent of the behaviour and work on ways to control it together

If I was a parent of the other children I really wouldn't be happy with this, it isn't fair on the other children, no child should feel scared by another child far less attacked....I know they are only little but it really is not on.....

[Maza]

Does he only go for the other children at drop off time? Is he maybe taking out his separation anxiety on them? Could you have something to distract him as he walks in? When my DD used to play up at drop off time I either gave her a special job to do, like hand over the register and pen (probably wouldn't work for your little one) or I would prepare a tray of open ended objects and keep them on top of my fridge and get them down as a mindee arrived so that they were an immediate distraction. It would be simple thngs like a tray of pompoms, bowls and tweezers, a basket of shells, a money box and coins. Again this might not work for you as all your little ones would want it and he might get posessive over it, but maybe there is something that would work as a distraction.