Parent refuse to pay and taken LO's out my care with no notice

Afternoon everyone :)

I was looking after 2 children (siblings) and have been doing so for approx 6 months. The last week in July the Mum came to me and said the little ones would be off for 3 weeks in August. I explained that as stated in the contract i need 4 weeks notice for her to use any of the 2 weeks free holiday she is entitled to. She was not happy so i was very good with her and allowed her 2 weeks free with her just having to pay for the 1 extra week they wouldnt be here. It came to the day before payment was due and i received a txt saying she couldnt pay me at all as her work hadnt paid her (she is in the army). I tried to come to an agreement with her however explained i needed the fees as it was my income. Her response to this was 'well now you have no income as im not bringing the children back' I sent her a final invoice along with a letter in the post giving her 7 days to pay and i heard nothing from her. I phoned NCMA legal advice this morning and they explained they would send out debt letters to her. I just wondered if anyone else had been in this situation and what happened? will i get the fees one way or another?

Many thanks
xxxxxx

Didn't want to read and run but no experience of this.... well done for being fair and firm, I sincerely hope you do get your money, unlikely that she wasn't paid if she's in the army!!!

Take Care, Jen x

Horrible situation, no advice as you have already contacted NCMA so hopefully they will help you sort it - however, having been in the army and married to someone in the army I can categorically say that there is no way that she has not been paid.

i was married to someone in the army and i agree....they always get paid!

i think she is pulling a fast one!

Wibble xxxx

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Originally Posted by jumpinjen

Didn't want to read and run but no experience of this.... well done for being fair and firm, I sincerely hope you do get your money, unlikely that she wasn't paid if she's in the army!!!

Take Care, Jen x

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It does happen, and frequently - however she is able to go to her pay clerk and ask for an advance of pay as she has not been paid. They will either take it off what they owe her this month or if she were to get paid double next month, off that. You'd be surprised how common this actually is - but there is a solution. She could follow this route - your payment would be late non the less but you would still get paid.

I got money back through the insurance with NCMA as they chased a non payer - as she is in the army, her whole future could be in trouble if she does not pay. The army does not look to favourably on debtors and bad ones at that.

xx

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Originally Posted by WibbleWobble

i was married to someone in the army and i agree....they always get paid!

i think she is pulling a fast one!

Wibble xxxx

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I do knopw a few people who have been missed off the pay run so to speak (I'm a military wife) but there is a solution the advance of pay - if they are in the wrong, they have to pay her. However, she may have had a sub last month off her wages due this month and therefore her wages would be less whatever she owed. x

NCMA have sent debt letters to my non payer, (£750), she has ignored them, so now they are preparing the court paperwork. I'm just waiting to see what happens next.

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Originally Posted by BuggsieMoo

I do knopw a few people who have been missed off the pay run so to speak (I'm a military wife) but there is a solution the advance of pay - if they are in the wrong, they have to pay her. However, she may have had a sub last month off her wages due this month and therefore her wages would be less whatever she owed. x

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I mustve been very lucky.....but having had experience of foul ups with the NHS and their pay i really should know better. And then again the army couldnt organise a drunken event in a brewery at times....if i remember rightly!:laughing::laughing:


love Wibble:thumbsup:

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Originally Posted by brightstar

NCMA have sent debt letters to my non payer, (£750), she has ignored them, so now they are preparing the court paperwork. I'm just waiting to see what happens next.

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How long did it take to get to that stage? Gosh its such a faff on isnt it :( .. please keep me informed - then i'll know what to expect to happen .. lol! i hate to cause a fuss but this was a bill of £1200 as i have both her little ones 50 hours a week!!!

Thanks for all your comments :) xxx

My friend who served most his working life in the army and in the civilian police reckons you should report her, and her CO would most likely 'encourage' her to get it sorted pretty :censored: quick, as it brings them into disrepute. She could potentially face a civilian charge too for misconduct in public office.

He also says the pay clerk would almost certainly have helped out. For something essential like childcare, most pay clerks would've subbed her from next month's pay, even if she'd been paid on time and had just got into a mess through overspending.

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Originally Posted by danielle10392

How long did it take to get to that stage? Gosh its such a faff on isnt it :( .. please keep me informed - then i'll know what to expect to happen .. lol! i hate to cause a fuss but this was a bill of £1200 as i have both her little ones 50 hours a week!!!

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Its taken about 2 months so far :panic: I'm not holding my breath for anything great. When it goes to court she'll probably end up paying a pittance weekly. I've got to carry it through as a matter of principle, she will pay one way or the other:angry:

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Originally Posted by bunyip

My friend who served most his working life in the army and in the civilian police reckons you should report her, and her CO would most likely 'encourage' her to get it sorted pretty :censored: quick, as it brings them into disrepute. She could potentially face a civilian charge too for misconduct in public office.

He also says the pay clerk would almost certainly have helped out. For something essential like childcare, most pay clerks would've subbed her from next month's pay, even if she'd been paid on time and had just got into a mess through overspending.

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When I worked in banking we had a bad debt which the customer wasnt paying despite all our best efforts. My area manager visited the branch and asked about it - I told her what we had done to try and obtain payment - within minutes she was on the phone to the area CO and the customer paid within days.
It is a fairly sure way of getting payment but Im not sure how it sits with 'confidentiality'.

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Originally Posted by mama2three

When I worked in banking we had a bad debt which the customer wasnt paying despite all our best efforts. My area manager visited the branch and asked about it - I told her what we had done to try and obtain payment - within minutes she was on the phone to the area CO and the customer paid within days.
It is a fairly sure way of getting payment but Im not sure how it sits with 'confidentiality'.

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I take your point about confidentiality, but I don't think it's quite applicable here. By approaching the client's CO, the CM would not be divulging any personal information that is confidential, because the army holds all those details already. And the CM would not be giving any information about the children, except that they were with the CM, which the army probably also knew.

The client is blaming the army (her employer) for late payment, so is it unreasonable to draw the matter to the employer's attention so as to seek a resolution?

I can't say for sure, but my educated guess would be that a serving soldier who is taken to court would almost certainly be required to inform their CO of the circumstances anyway.

This is not some poor mum on an estate who has to decide whether she pay the CM, the rent, or buys food for the week. The one thing about being in the forces is that they feed and shelter you (it's only when they leave that a disproportionate number of them end up on the street with a drink problem.) Perhaps that's part of the problem: if the army is looking after her basic needs, she's never learnt to be responsible with her pay.

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Originally Posted by bunyip

I take your point about confidentiality, but I don't think it's quite applicable here. By approaching the client's CO, the CM would not be divulging any personal information that is confidential, because the army holds all those details already. And the CM would not be giving any information about the children, except that they were with the CM, which the army probably also knew.

The client is blaming the army (her employer) for late payment, so is it unreasonable to draw the matter to the employer's attention so as to seek a resolution?

I can't say for sure, but my educated guess would be that a serving soldier who is taken to court would almost certainly be required to inform their CO of the circumstances anyway.

This is not some poor mum on an estate who has to decide whether she pay the CM, the rent, or buys food for the week. The one thing about being in the forces is that they feed and shelter you (it's only when they leave that a disproportionate number of them end up on the street with a drink problem.) Perhaps that's part of the problem: if the army is looking after her basic needs, she's never learnt to be responsible with her pay.

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It wouldnt be so bad but both her and her hubbyb are in the army on a fairly good wage .. they recently bought 2 brand new cars so they arent stuck for cash and theyve booked a holiday to dubai which wont be cheap! i spoke to her welfare officer and he said there was nothing they could do .. but everyone i seem to speak to said they should be able to do something .. so think im gonna go higher. xxx

If you are cleared owed this money I would go to the Small Claims on line and get them to issue proceedings. It costs about £80 which I would have thought was worth the investment for that amount.

I would then copy the paperwork to the couples Commanding Office with supporting paperwork and then ask them if they can help sort it out.

As far as my experience of the services go, they would not like this at all and at the very least if what you say is true and can be substantiated, then they will take a very dim view of two of their staff being taken to small claims over such an issue.

I would write to them as we would do any parent. State how much and by when the amount is to be paid. Say to them that unless X is received by Y then you will have no option left then to bring proceedings against them which will have to involve their COs; surely this will send them into shock at their employers finding out (as the reason they are not paying you is the Army's fault).

This might prompt them before you actually have to go down proceedings route.

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Originally Posted by bunyip

I take your point about confidentiality, but I don't think it's quite applicable here. By approaching the client's CO, the CM would not be divulging any personal information that is confidential, because the army holds all those details already. And the CM would not be giving any information about the children, except that they were with the CM, which the army probably also knew.

The client is blaming the army (her employer) for late payment, so is it unreasonable to draw the matter to the employer's attention so as to seek a resolution?

I can't say for sure, but my educated guess would be that a serving soldier who is taken to court would almost certainly be required to inform their CO of the circumstances anyway.
You are correct in this statement - any court proceedings need to be brought to her CO's attention. Bad debt can be taken against her very seriously by the army and may end her career.

This is not some poor mum on an estate who has to decide whether she pay the CM, the rent, or buys food for the week. The one thing about being in the forces is that they feed and shelter you (it's only when they leave that a disproportionate number of them end up on the street with a drink problem.) Perhaps that's part of the problem: if the army is looking after her basic needs, she's never learnt to be responsible with her pay.

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Here however you are incorrect - it is only single or married unaccompained serving personal who are feed/housed by the military - but this is taken from source (i.e. pay) at reduced rates. As she has a child, she will be living in military accomodation (or own her own that she lives in) and will be paying rent direct from her wages before she receives it. Other things like food and utility are exactly the same as civvie street - she goes to Tescos, she contacts and pays British Gas direct for example - if she has not been paid, then she will not be able to do any of these things either, her rent will not be paid and she will also be in bad debt to them.

However, as has been said previously her pay clerk can and will sub her to pay childcare, by food, pay utilities etc - however if it is cos she has overspent this month already and gets a sub, you will be in the same position next month as anything she is subbed will come off nexts months wages

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Originally Posted by VINASOL

I would write to them as we would do any parent. State how much and by when the amount is to be paid. Say to them that unless X is received by Y then you will have no option left then to bring proceedings against them which will have to involve their COs; surely this will send them into shock at their employers finding out (as the reason they are not paying you is the Army's fault).

This might prompt them before you actually have to go down proceedings route.

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ive already sent them a final letter 8 days ago giving them 7 days notice. I mentioned previously that because she said the army hadnt paid her i would discuss the matter with her CO and her response to this was 'they will laugh in your face' - delightful lady :(

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Originally Posted by danielle10392

ive already sent them a final letter 8 days ago giving them 7 days notice. I mentioned previously that because she said the army hadnt paid her i would discuss the matter with her CO and her response to this was 'they will laugh in your face' - delightful lady :(

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She is an idiot and clearly is taking this route in the hope that you wont take it to her CO. If you know her unit, base etc then I would write a private and confidential letter to her CO explaining the situation, cite the reason she has given for non payment (if she has been paid, then obviously its a lie again something that would not be too good for her) and ask her CO to deal with it before you take it to small claims court. Advise that you have sought legal advise and that if you do not receive a satisfactory response from them or her within X days then you will be left with no alternative but to issue small claims court proceedings. I would also write to her husbands CO (if not the same, if the same mention them both in the letter).

Hi,

I am following this thread, as I am very interested to see the outcome, and how things proceed with the NCMA on the legal side of things. Can't offer any advice unfortunately, with I could, but I really feel for you. She sounds awful!

It's helpful to read though as I would have no idea what to do myself in this situation! Sounds like you have been more than reasonable with her, and she is being quite unpleasant!