Crowd control!

[ManicMum]

Hello

I have children of my own of 18 months, 5 and 6 years old. Mindees are 3 and 4 years old. 3 of them are at school and the 3 year old is pre-school.

When we get back from school, I keep planning to do something with them all but just turns into exercise in crowd control. Usual demands of drinks, toilet, hungry, nappy changes. Then there is the fighting and arguing. Even when they are doing something like colouring, it turns into a squabble.

Does anyone have any tips? I think it is because it's two sets of siblings and all consecutive ages. I keep feeling bad as though it's my fault we are not doing more meaningful activities. During the summer we got out more to parks etc but nights closing in now. I try to involve them with watching me do the dinner or a bit of stirring. Am I beating myself up? It's difficult to get them all interested in one thing at once - especially as I have the toddler too.

any advice or anyone in similar situation?

thanks

[The Juggler]

Hello

I have children of my own of 18 months, 5 and 6 years old. Mindees are 3 and 4 years old. 3 of them are at school and the 3 year old is pre-school.

When we get back from school, I keep planning to do something with them all but just turns into exercise in crowd control. Usual demands of drinks, toilet, hungry, nappy changes. Then there is the fighting and arguing. Even when they are doing something like colouring, it turns into a squabble.

Does anyone have any tips? I think it is because it's two sets of siblings and all consecutive ages. I keep feeling bad as though it's my fault we are not doing more meaningful activities. During the summer we got out more to parks etc but nights closing in now. I try to involve them with watching me do the dinner or a bit of stirring. Am I beating myself up? It's difficult to get them all interested in one thing at once - especially as I have the toddler too.

any advice or anyone in similar situation?

thanks

that's why I'm stopping doing evening meals. At one point I had 7 children who were siblings, 2 pairs and one set of 3. They usually settle down after they have had 10 mins in the house though. I find the age groups gravitate together and chill out a bit. I have some in the lounge and some doing kitchen activities and some chilling with a bit of tv.

[MissTinkerbell]

Hello


When we get back from school, I keep planning to do something with them all but just turns into exercise in crowd control. Usual demands of drinks, toilet, hungry, nappy changes. Then there is the fighting and arguing.

Snap!!!

All my mindees are preschoolers and its my own 3 which then come home from school. I just tend to get a box of toys out and pop the TV on which gives me chance to finish sorting tea out; we then clear up the toys and eat about 4.30pm. Usually by the time tea is over parents are here and everyone goes home, if not we get the book box out and share some books.

I now don't worry about doing stuff because they are often tired by this time of day and just want to play quietly or watch TV. Plus with the preschoolers we've either been places or done activities during the day.

I think half the time we forget that parents put their children with us because they want a home from home and at this time of day in any household this is what its like. I think we also forget that we do not have to be doing activities with the children all the time and that it is perfectly OK for them to have some time chilling or free play.

[Dragonfly]

Would agree with Tinkerbell on this one. I think we forget that when children come back form nursery/school etc they are usually tired and need some chill out time, exspecially now the days are getting shorter, I do think children get more tired when the natural day light starts going if you get my driff.

[sarah707]

I prepare snack and drinks before I go out to school so we walk in, wash hands / toilet and sit straight down to eat and drink.

i find this helps stop the asking for food and rushing around you get when there are lots of children vying for your attention all at the same time.

Then they go straight from snack into an activity - usually one they have asked for the day / session before.

As all mine are part timers, I have a sheet and they say what they might enjoy doing around our theme on different days... they don't have to do it, but if they still want to then it is planned and resourced for them.

Before tea we tidy up (usually to music) and then have either a book or song session to calm everyone down.

I am lucky though I have a chef to make tea When he wasn't here I used to prep earlier in the day and use my slow cooker or cook and freeze at the weekend so everything was easy to get out and make.

The children help with setting the table and pouring water etc so that they are all kept busy and the older ones play with the little ones to keep them out of the way while food is being carried around.

It's mostly about finding a routine that works for you so everyone knows yes, in a minute they will get a drink... yes in a minute they will be fed... yes in a minute they will be able to get the playdough out etc.

Then they stop asking all the time and go off to read a book or play quietly until I am ready for them.

Hth

[Pipsqueak]

i find the gaffa tape and cupboard under the stairs helps brilliantly!!! lol


Like Sarah I prep before I leave for school, lay it out where possible.
We sit and eat/drink

My older kids normally head straight outside into the garden and burn of energy there.
The littlies will often settle down doing jigsaws or whatever.

the children all know the 'schedule' and its a matter of finding your own flow.

I don't have any for evening meals thankfully but have normally stuck our tea on by a certain time.

[ManicMum]

thanks guys. I feel so much better. Was getting a bit down thinking I must be crap childminder. You know how it is when you go on these courses and they suggest all these things you are supposed to cram into the day. Over the summer, the kids maiinly wanted to play in the garden most of the time. Yes, there were squabbles but they kept going back out so thought it silly to stop them and say 'right, everyone sit down and do playdough now'. We get so little sunshine in Scotland, thought it best to let them get their vitamin D supplies stocked up!

I think sticking some music on whilst tidying up good idea - less of a chore then.

thanks!

[emmadines]

i agree - I think the kids are tired afterschool and need that time out to do what they want. i try to have an activity once twice a week, if they dont want to do it they dont. summer we walk the dog or go to the park.