OMG What would you do?

[Denise D]

We were outside in the garden when a dead pigeon fell from a tree and landed in the corner of our garden near the back fence. Feathers flew everywhere and the pigeon had a noticeable wound in the chest area. The children were upset and curious at the same time. I tried to explain that it had been hurt and died, which is why it fell from the tree. My mindee, 2.5, was curious and asked a lot of questions, and my daughter, 4, was visibly upset and became tearful. I tried to explain that it is going to the angels, where it would be happy and that the angels would look after it.

My daughter has started acting out in the last 20 minutes, (the pigeon fell about 45 min ago) is there more I should say...?

How would you have handled it?

By the way, I wrapped it up in plastic bags and disposed of it already, so we are not going to bury it or anything.

[madasahatter]

I would do much the same as you. You've explained in terms they can understand that the bird was hurt and has died. You've disposed of it so it isn't a health hazard. I would now try and forget about it. Your daughter will forget too (once she's told daddy and grandma and the neighbours dog all about it ). We have come across dead mice, frogs and birds whilst out for walks and children will accept these things as just a part of life (and death). The worst one for me was finding a neighbours cat by the side of the road on the school run. It was obviously dead, but because it was a cat the LO's wanted to stroke it and the fact that I wouldn't let them was more upsetting to them.
I wouldn't do anything else, but if your daughter askes more questions be prepared to answer them, but I would go for a matter of fact way rather than a sad/emotional way.

[katickles]

Do you know what - I honestly have no idea what I would have done. I would have said similar things to you I guess.

I think you will - but make sure you let the parents know as if it does play on mindee's mind they will need to know about it.

Not sure what to suggest for your dd - with her being older she's more likely to think about it. I guess just talking to her like you have done & just lots of reasurring hugs??

[mabel]

brill, you handled it well

now go and write it up under your 'obs' you have handled your PSE for today
well done !

[youarewhatyoueat]

Was it shot?

[Winnie]

that takes me back...about 6 yrs ago a pigeon decided to die under our climbing frame, it was well hidden. I had done the usual sweep of the garden but missed it completly. One of the lo's found it but luckily it was fresh We took it into the main part of the garden & buried it as i would have done with my own children- gave it a dignified ending. There were questions about heaven and being old etc, i just gave simple honest answers and told the parents....one was my network co-ordinator but no one objected to the way i handled it.

[flora]

Living where we do there are many shoots and the kids have come across dead game from time to time.

I think you handle it well,

I always keep it simple, factual and low key.

Have found this works well.

When Ben our dog died in the summer, we buried him in the field, my dd 3 watched us bury him and we all had a cry and job done.

The in somebody's wisdom they saw fit to tell her he was in heaven and in the clouds.

Nothing wrong in this per se as I know this is what you have said , but Hannah gets confused as to where her Bennie is

She knows he is in the hole in the ground, but then also in heaven and she struggle with this abit.

[nannymcflea]

I keep it factual like flora said. I don't do the heavens bit as some parents don't believe then they have to explain it differently.

My hubby would have said "well thats one less flying rat"

[TheBTeam]

OOh yuk. I remember when I was about 13 walking through Windsor High street a pigeon fell out of the sky and bounced on my head and down my front and landed on the floor in front of me! I did not laugh about it for quite some time!

[PixiePetal]

Living where we do there are many shoots and the kids have come across dead game from time to time.

I think you handle it well,

I always keep it simple, factual and low key.

Have found this works well.

When Ben our dog died in the summer, we buried him in the field, my dd 3 watched us bury him and we all had a cry and job done.

The in somebody's wisdom they saw fit to tell her he was in heaven and in the clouds.

Nothing wrong in this per se as I know this is what you have said , but Hannah gets confused as to where her Bennie is

She knows he is in the hole in the ground, but then also in heaven and she struggle with this abit.

Having country bumpkin kids as we do, they are used to life and death with the animals. They have been on pheasant shoots since about 7 or 8 and before that helped with rearing chicks - with the obvious odd deaths. So used to it and take it in their stride.

We found a dead pigeon on the way walking to school once - when we lived on a council estate. As we were usually the earliest walking that way I asked DD to move it to the side of the road (thinking she would push it to the side with her foot). Oh no, she picked it up by the leg and lobbed it to the back of the grass verge behind the dog bin

Back to the subject -

Denise, I think you handled it well and would just tell mindees parent incase it comes into conversation later.

[flora]

Having country bumpkin kids as we do, they are used to life and death with the animals. They have been on pheasant shoots since about 7 or 8 and before that helped with rearing chicks - with the obvious odd deaths. So used to it and take it in their stride.

We found a dead pigeon on the way walking to school once - when we lived on a council estate. As we were usually the earliest walking that way I asked DD to move it to the side of the road (thinking she would push it to the side with her foot). Oh no, she picked it up by the leg and lobbed it to the back of the grass verge behind the dog bin

Back to the subject -

Denise, I think you handled it well and would just tell mindees parent incase it comes into conversation later.

this sounds so like my harry, having said that I think even three year old Hnnah would do the same

[Denise D]

Thanks everybody for the reassurances. I was a bit spooked myself when it happened, and it surprised me that my dd would have such an emotional response. She was fine the rest of the day.

[Mollymop]

JUst tell her the pigeon has died and that he has gone to heaven with the other birds and is having a lovely time... we see dead squashed birds on the roads, hedgehogs, foxes, cats a round here all the time.

Hope she is ok