baby screamed all the time

**hayleychildcare** · 08-09-2009, 03:00 PM

Ive just had a 6 month old for the first settling in period today and she just screamed at me all the time.

I tried everthing to distract her and still she cried

She finally stopped screaming at me on the school run where she just looked at me with a pet lip on

She is coming again on friday for longer

No idea what to do as today i had just her and friday will be a 2year old and a 3 year old aswell

**Sally G** · 08-09-2009, 03:45 PM

That is really hard but just grit your teeth and carry on as much as normal as you can! maybe with the other chldren there the baby will be distracted! good luck and have a cold bottle of wine in the fridge for the evening.

**haribo** · 08-09-2009, 03:52 PM

i agree - they like other kids around and can be easier , its normal at that age to cry at strangers she will soon be familiar with you

**grindal** · 08-09-2009, 04:52 PM

When my first ever mindee started she screamed all day. In the pushchair, in the highchair, in the cot, in my arms, and she screamed even more when I tried to move her from place top place. It got better very quickly. Hope yours does too!!

**gegele** · 08-09-2009, 04:55 PM

i have a babay who just started last week. as soon as i put her down she screams! if she 's settled and i leave the room she screams!

by talking to mum i realised she's always carried everywhere, parents just started to leave room (she's nearly 9months!). she's better at toddler groups as there are lots around to distract her.

she's getting better slowly, just have to wait and see lOL

wish i thought of the wine!!!

**uf353432** · 08-09-2009, 05:02 PM

9 months is a typical separation anxiety hot spot - your 6 mth old will naturally feel they are in a strange place and crying is there only means of communicating all their feelings. Perhaps ask mum if the baby has any comforters at home, is their any songs she sings? can mum sleep with a muslin or blankie before your next visit and leave for the next settling in visit so she can still smell mum. Check that you have her routine written and refer to it often to anticipate if baby is crying because they are hungry, sleepy, wet etc. If you can stick to mums routine until the baby is settled to give him/her some consistency and comfort from that consistency. Of course if you are doing all this already - guess you'll have to ride the tidal wave and hope you don't go mad in the meantime xx

**angeldelight** · 08-09-2009, 05:52 PM

I think you have to be really patient

You are a stranger to this baby so its lots of changes for her

Hope Friday is a bit better though

Good luck

Angel xx

**sarah707** · 08-09-2009, 06:04 PM

I've had a few screamers now and it really depends on your level of coping.

If you can hear the noise without being upset by it, then just carry on as normal and involve her and she will settle eventually.

If it really upsets you and you cannot cope with it, then you might think the baby isn't right for you and your household.

I can switch off from it but I know a lot of people who can't. Be honest with yourself.

Hth

**Louise_Oaktree** · 08-09-2009, 06:43 PM

Good advice from everyone. I am in week 3 of my screamer now and he's magically transformed into a lovely 12 month old

The settling in sessions were bad - he cried and cried. Once he started coming for full days every day improved. He still cries when dropped off and usually unsettled until after morning nap but when he wakes he wakes with a smile and stays like that until home time.

I found taking him everywhere really helped distract him, as soon as we walked through the front door he would start crying as if he remembered Mum going. Today is day 2 of 3rd week and he has been brilliant, even settled himself off to sleep which he never does at home.

He has starting coming up to me and hugging me - I really feel taken with him now more than any other child I have had, I think it's because he shows how he feels and obviously has grown to like me now

sometimes I have had children I can't really take to and I thought it might just be me but this time I feel really settled with him and nothing is too much trouble.

Hang in there - I found comforting the child but also knowing when to ignore it works well. Sometimes my screamer would cry and then stop, then look at me to see if I had noticed, if I didn't make eye contact he would stop crying and pick up a toy...now he doesn't even bother! Funny though - as soon as Mum comes he tries it on her and starts crying!

**LottieLuLu** · 10-09-2009, 08:54 AM

Hi I am on here while working, in sheer desperation. Baby is sleeping . I have done a month of trial visits and baby aged 11 months cried all the time except when being carried..

I hoped it would get better now here for 2 and half days but it's worse if anything. I just can't carry him everywhere and do painting etc with the others, he grabs out and they get upset too.

What I cant understand is why mother attachment parented, sling, breast on demand right up to the day she went back to work and expected the poor little man to settle with anyone else!! I discovered this from another childminder who knew her and funnily enough didn't have a vacancy!!

Just asking for some advice for what to say to mother? Should I tell her that he cries all the time? I don't want her to be in work upsetand sad!

Please send your best wishes

thankyou

**mama2three** · 10-09-2009, 09:07 AM

sorry , no magic wand - but lots of hugs for you. my ds has some swimming ear plugs you can borrow!

**LottieLuLu** · 10-09-2009, 11:24 AM

Thank you, It's heartbreaking. I can see that he is a lovely happy boy but won't let himself relax enough to enjoy being here!!

**balloon** · 11-09-2009, 07:52 AM

Originally Posted by LottieLuLu

Just asking for some advice for what to say to mother? Should I tell her that he cries all the time? I don't want her to be in work upsetand sad!

thankyou

I would tell her...

Otherwise if you decide you cannot cope it's going to come as a massive shock to her. If I was the mother I would want to know then I could try and work out a way with my childminder that my child was happier...