feeling really sad about asking for money for summer

**miss mopple** · 27-07-2009, 08:05 AM

I would look at increasing your hourly rate and making it an all inclusive one so there are no issues like this in the future.

Like others I dont ask for outings fees, I cover all costs and the children arent allowed to bring spending money either as it causes too many arguments.

Hope you can resolve it.

**mabel** · 27-07-2009, 10:41 AM

I too agree with mouse, once I have agreed contract fees I never ask for anything else.
I would not buy expensive cakes (always make my own) and don't even buy
posh ice creams it is always the basics here and the children understand that
as there is lot to buy for.

The bus pass sounds a great idea and saving but you should organise it.

After 15 years and over 70 children some parents are not chatty, they just want a minder, others want a friendship, other need your advice 24/7 !!

the beauty of our job is what will the next parent be like
welcome to the world of childminding and I do hope you start to feel better
about it all soon.

**newandlearning** · 27-07-2009, 12:33 PM

Thank you everyone for your support, thoughts and ideas.. this particular experience has a big learning experience for me.. plus its my first summer with 5 children which has totally changed my view regarding going out to places that cost a lot.. luckily.. I'm now beginning to look at my own local county for cheaper days out and am beginning to be cheaper with my own creativity... I need to get cheaper.. I've given a list of each day's prospective outings now along with costs and said that I'd welcome any ideas she could have of other outings she would rather we did other things.. I'm going to keep a log of costs.. and see how things go.. xx

**Curly Quavers** · 27-07-2009, 01:05 PM

Originally Posted by newandlearning

Hi if you have a Bus ID in our area you only pay 20p for each child..
without this you have to pay half an adult fare.. and the adult fare is £3.60..

so with 2 LOs over 5.. it quite a savings over the summer.

I guess I am in a fortunate position having a car. But I pay the diesel that goes in to it and if I I take kids on an outing I do not ask for diesel money from parents but do put the 40 pence per mile through the books.

My thoughts are you should be paying for the bus pass and putting it through your books as a childminding expense as it rightly is. Is this not included in your hourly rate?

**The Juggler** · 27-07-2009, 01:11 PM

Originally Posted by mfrancesmo

I guess I am in a fortunate position having a car. But I pay the diesel that goes in to it and if I I take kids on an outing I do not ask for diesel money from parents but do put the 40 pence per mile through the books.

My thoughts are you should be paying for the bus pass and putting it through your books as a childminding expense as it rightly is. Is this not included in your hourly rate?

some of the bus passes are free it's just that parents need to apply and sign for them.

**Curly Quavers** · 27-07-2009, 01:14 PM

Originally Posted by The Juggler

some of the bus passes are free it's just that parents need to apply and sign for them.

ok my apologies didn't realise

**PixiePetal** · 27-07-2009, 01:53 PM

It's like that with our local bus company. Their birth certificate has to be taken in and parent needs to sign.

Got my own kids passes. It has gone up to 50p a trip now if they are without me (age 12 and 15) or 30p, i think, with me. Better than £1.80 each

No over 5's mindees at the moment but will ask parents to get one if I do have them.

**Chatterbox Childcare** · 27-07-2009, 02:44 PM

Originally Posted by The Juggler

some of the bus passes are free it's just that parents need to apply and sign for them.

If the bus pass issue is that mum needs to sign and hasn't then get a form and ask her to do it when she is collecting, you could fill in the rest then

**newandlearning** · 27-07-2009, 03:03 PM

hi ya.. I offered support with getting the bus ID .. I downloaded the form, offered to go to Tesco to print off the passport photo and offered to post to Bus Company once mum had signed application form but needed to ask her for a copy of birth certificate.. mum said she was happy to send off and would sort out photo etc herself.

who would have thought a 'free' Bus ID would have caused so many people to get involved .. I think she's phoned a friend to do the photo now

Wot a hoot!! I realise I've been a pain in the proverbial (can I say that?) .. and what I will ensure happens in future is that this will be something I ask for when a child starts with me and can be added to my registration pack.. this LO had only just turned 5 years though so I couldn't have done much more.. I spoke with mum again today and said I was sorry about last week and that if she ever felt she was unhappy with anything that I did in my setting that I would appreciate the feedback.. on top of this I always give out regular feedback forms so would hope any bad feeling would get caught before it got out of hand..xx

**Goatgirl** · 27-07-2009, 03:43 PM

Hi,
Sounds like you're back on top now. I'm glad!!
bws,
wendy :-)

**manjay** · 27-07-2009, 03:52 PM

Originally Posted by newandlearning

hi ya.. I offered support with getting the bus ID .. I downloaded the form, offered to go to Tesco to print off the passport photo and offered to post to Bus Company once mum had signed application form but needed to ask her for a copy of birth certificate.. mum said she was happy to send off and would sort out photo etc herself.

who would have thought a 'free' Bus ID would have caused so many people to get involved .. I think she's phoned a friend to do the photo now

Wot a hoot!! I realise I've been a pain in the proverbial (can I say that?) .. and what I will ensure happens in future is that this will be something I ask for when a child starts with me and can be added to my registration pack.. this LO had only just turned 5 years though so I couldn't have done much more.. I spoke with mum again today and said I was sorry about last week and that if she ever felt she was unhappy with anything that I did in my setting that I would appreciate the feedback.. on top of this I always give out regular feedback forms so would hope any bad feeling would get caught before it got out of hand..xx

You live and learn! Glad you are feeling better about it. From what you say I don't think you could have done much more and now you have come up with a way to get it sorted easier next time.

**FizzysFriends** · 27-07-2009, 03:53 PM

I'm a big out of it so haven't read the whole thread but if you are taking 5 kids out email the place first tell them u are a minder and ask for a discount I do it and have got schools rates so etimes

**newandlearning** · 27-07-2009, 04:11 PM

that's a great idea about getting discounts.. I think I'm gonna phone up everywhere I'm planning on going and see if I can get discounts. thanks for the tip.xx

**cuffleygirl** · 27-07-2009, 05:03 PM

Hi

I do know exactly where you're coming from on this one. I too had a good relationship with a parent and the same as in your case mindee and my son became best friends/brothers (and I still believe it was good and friendly not purely professional) I have looked after this mindee since he was 18months old he his now 8.

The relationship evolved she seemed to want to know everything about my life and would share nothing in return including details that would be useful about her sons welfare. To the point now she drives me insane at times and I have to remind myself I look after her son for money - I don't look after her! she just pays me and frankly the least amount of time she spends here the better. But I put on my professional stance and treat her the same as other parents but I truly care for her son.

Looking back I can pinpoint the pivotal time and it was a point were circumstances changed in her life nothing to do with me but it seems to have changed her perspective on life and all her relationships and she felt she could trust no one, its sad but all I can do is offer her child a warm and caring and constant environment. She tells other people she appreciates me but never me and at times is a complete ***** to me I rise above it and that makes me the professional!

She may have something going on in her life that is affecting her and she knows that you are a kind caring person and if she even eludes to what is going on a kind word may upset (don't say anything nice it will make me cry scenerio) and it may be easier for her to just shut down

Long winded hope it makes sense