Food advice

[mumofone]

Hoping you lovely people can help or advise me! I am at my wits end with my son (2 years old) and a mindee (2.6yrs old) and their eating habits! Mindees mum wants me to get them eating more/new things but they are so fussy and I spend ages making lovely meals which they wont touch. Im wasting so much food (and effort!). What they do eat is healthy (ie. not Cr@p!) as I only provide healthy things but its just so limited and I feel like im banging my head against a brick wall. Ive tried cutting back on snacks, Ive tried supernanny/3 day nanny methods but all to no avail. I feel bad for the mindees parents because I feel like as a childminder i should magically have their child eating a wider range of things but its just not happening.
I dont know whether their tastes start to widen when they hit 3 but for now they are having a very limited range of foods. Help!!

[Kiddleywinks]

What sort of things are they eating currently, & what things have you tried?

[moggy]

All we can do is work with parents- what are they eating at home? how are they eating? what has mum tried at home to improve things? We are not miracle workers (and certainly aren't paid enough to be!).
Two is a typical age to start getting fussy. Some get through it and end up eating all sorts, others seem to end up fussy for years to come, some are fussy for their whole lives.
Sounds like you have tried all the basic things but parents need to be supporting the same at home.
If they are eating healthy things, are growing and developing well, are basically healthy, then I wouldn't worry too much. Keep offering little bits of new things, no pressure, make eating and meal times a positive experience- all stuff I am sure you are doing.

[mumofone]

What sort of things are they eating currently, & what things have you tried?

Mindee eats: Most Fruits - apples, pears, bananas, melon, strawberries etc..
Will eat veg sticks - carrot and cucumber
Will eat cheese
Will eat bread, ricecakes, breadsticks, dried cereals
Peanut butter
Yoghurt ( i only serve natural yoghurt)
And i think that's it.

My son eats -
Bananas on a good day, apples and pears and other fruit ONLY if pureed and mixed with yoghurt
Cereals -weetabix, bran flakes
Toast, bread, peanut butter, marmite, houmous,
Macaroni cheese - i sneak brocolli and cauliflower in
Spaghetti bolognaise on a good week
Ham, cheese
baked beans (ive always considered these ok but my partner tells me they're unhealthy?!)
Breadsticks, crackers, ryvita, croissants!

Mindee has very bad constipation. My son is very regular! I have a feeling mindee gets sweets cake and biscuits at home but my son never gets these and doesnt like them. My son drinks a lot (water and milk) mindee will drink but think family mostly give squash which i wont give them here.

All the meals I make are Annabel Karmels, cooked from scratch but mindee wont touvh any of them and my son touches a few - i feel like mindees behaviour is rubbing off him and making him worse :-(

[mumofone]

All we can do is work with parents- what are they eating at home? how are they eating? what has mum tried at home to improve things? We are not miracle workers (and certainly aren't paid enough to be!).
Two is a typical age to start getting fussy. Some get through it and end up eating all sorts, others seem to end up fussy for years to come, some are fussy for their whole lives.
Sounds like you have tried all the basic things but parents need to be supporting the same at home.
If they are eating healthy things, are growing and developing well, are basically healthy, then I wouldn't worry too much. Keep offering little bits of new things, no pressure, make eating and meal times a positive experience- all stuff I am sure you are doing.

Sorry i forgot to say that both are developing well with no concerns except mindee is severley constipated - mum seems in denial about this but ive recommended they see the doctor

[sarah707]

We make small meals for children who eat limited diets and they can have seconds ... we freeze what is left and try again another time rather than waste.

Sometimes you have to try things more than once.

Don't be disheartened about throwing food away - freeze it for another time! Plus if parent/s are paying for food then it's covered anyway.

It can be hard but keep going you are doing all the right things... most important though is to take the pressure off meal times.

Offer the child the food - let the child eat what they want - remove the plate and praise them for what they have eaten - chat and keep the meal happy and jolly - we play lots of games at meal times and never urge or push a child to eat ... they are offered more food at the next meal time.

I hope things improve x

[Mouse]

It sounds to me as if the parents don't follow a healthy eating plan, but expect you to do it even though they don't. They want their child to eat a healthy diet but aren't going to be the ones to enforce it.

Is mindee with you for their evening meal? What time do they go home? If possible I'd try to drop the evening meal and suggest parents give that at home. You can then use the limited foods they will eat to plan lunches. It would also mean you can concentrate in your son's evening meal without him being influenced by the other child.

If that's not possible I would try to lose the guilt about not being able to expand mindee's diet. There's only so much you can do but I'd rather give a child food I know they will eat rather than keep trying alternatives that end up in the bin. Use what they do like as a basis for meals and add in a small amount of something different each time. It might mean you're still throwing something away, but at least it won't be a whole meal that you've spent time preparing.

I'm having similar issues at the moment. I've had an 18 month old here for 5 weeks. When parents first came to see me we talked about the food I provide and they were very enthusiastic about it, saying what a lovely menu it was. The first couple of weeks here the child didn't eat anything. WHen I told parents they just said that she didn't eat much normally. I was still not getting anywhere so asked mum to provide me with a list of food mindee will eat. SHe said "oh, all she eats is yoghurt, crisps and raisins"! I said that when we'd discussed food they'd said how mindee would enjoy it all and mum said she'd never really tried any of it and they'd just hoped she'd eat it!
This child refuses to eat anything so I'm having to give her yoghurt, crisps and raisins Each day I try adding in a bit of cheese, ham, different fruit etc, but she won't eat any of it and I don't know what else I can do. Luckily I only give her lunch so I don't have to struggle with any other meals.

[mumofone]

Sorry i forgot to say too that initially i was doing the hot meal in the evening (well early evening around 5) before they went home but i felt they purposefully wouldn't eat at that time because they knew they would get something else from their mum at home before bed. My son seemed too tired at that time to try new foods. So i switched hot meals to lunch times so i had longer to faff around etc but that's not working either :-(

[blue bear]

Two is the age when they take control, food, potty training tantrums oh the joy.
I doas sarahdoes and serve small portions, read a story, sing songs, talk about our day, meal times are really chilled out times. Are they having much time between eating? I find early breakfast so 7:45 and lunch around 12 (earlier or later depending if children are asking) no snack in between. I always make sure they have been out for some physical exercise every day, such as a walk, play in the park, in the garden, soft play etc.
Pop the plate down with a smile, out comes the story book, we chat about the story and hopefully some of the dinner goes in, when I think they have had long enough all cleaned up and down from the table.

[FloraDora]

Every child I have minded has been a little particular at times. We introduce just one thing at a time to a meal we know they like...so at most meals there is always something they like, it does mean you have to be creative in how and what with, you introduce something.
I only provide a light lunch and a snack type tea and it takes DH and I longer to create menus that will suit all than it does for me to plan activities!
Even our little ones like helping us make some things and they do have enthusiasm to eat it after...but immediately after as they don't really understand ' waiting'.
One little one loved mashing potato - we transferred it into a cool bowl and let it cool a little - he grated the cheese in our children's grater and bashed with a masher DH made down to LO size ( he was a metal work teacher amongst other things, his skills often come in handy) ...then added new tastes over the year. Never ate potato- but always ate this.

A home made pizza is our way of introducing lots of new vegetables and meats. DH makes them in LO's favourite shape, he makes a low key tomato paste with fresh tomatoes, but doesn't always use it for LO's who prefer dry things. Most always just eat it , no fuss, but if they do pick off something at least they have eaten something and most like the base. But we can't do this very often in the month.

[bunyip]

Excelent advice there already.



I particularly agree with Sarah that you shouldn't worry too much about throwing away food. I still find this difficult, coming from a family where my mum had to budget very tightly. But I'm just about coming to terms with the idea that we have to accept a lot of waste as CMs. I've had some real fussy eaters here (will I get shot for using the expression?) and failed weaning fads that the mums insist on pursuing, so I've had times when I was preparing food with 90% certainty that I could save time by just throwing it straight in the bin without troubling the child to tip it all over the lace first.

Moggy is certainly correct in saying, "All we can do is work with parents- what are they eating at home? how are they eating? what has mum tried at home to improve things? We are not miracle workers (and certainly aren't paid enough to be!)." This is just one area, like potty training, where some parents believe they're paying their CM to do the whole thing, with little or no effort on their part.

With that in mind, I'd be thinking of setting up some sort of 'food diary' both at home and at your setting. Write down everything you offer; what they eat, and roughly how much. See if there are any similarities/differences between home and your setting. This will give you the basis of a plan, and serve as evidence that you are most definitely playing your part in the partnership.

I was one the fussiest eaters ever as a child, and it quite definitely to do with me taking control.

[Maza]

Looking at the food lists, they are not that bad really - your son seems like the 'better' of the two. They do both seem to be getting something from each food group too. Can't say the same for poor Mouse's mindee though!

I do agree that children can have an effect on each other whether directly or indirectly. I had one mindee who wouldn't touch fruit/veg sticks of any kind. One day, I suddenly realised that as a result of this I had been offering cheese and breadsticks/crackers instead of fresh fruit and veg for snacks on the three days that he was here and so everyone's quota of fruit and veg had decreased.

As Bunyip says, excellent advice already given. I remember once when DD was going through a fussy stage I just happened to get back home much later than our usual tea time and so ended up serving her dinner about an hour later that usual. She ate every last bit - she was obviously starving! After that I pushed meal times back a bit and things improved for a while until the next fussy stage.

I'm sure you've analysed it already but also look at textures of food. Quite a few children don't like 'sloppy' food like cottage pie, or wet foods like casseroles. They usually do like crunchy foods though or food separated and not mixed together to form a particular dish.

Have you tried Annabel Karmel's golden veg and lentil soup? All mine have loved that one - I usually serve it with toast and sometimes they will just have a couple of dips to start off with or I will spread a thin layer of it onto their toast. They do usually want to lick the bowl though - not my recipe so I can't take credit! Hubby and I love it too so a good lunch for all. Just offer kids tiny portions and as Sarah said they can have seconds or you can freeze what you haven't served up.

[mumofone]

Thanks everyone, i may give them until christmas doing what im doing and asking mum for any more suggestions but then i may suggest we revert back to cold lunches where i can still introduce new foods just not ones that have taken me a ton of time and effort to cook only to be thrown in the bin! Gah who said childminding was easy!!! ;-)

[mumofone]

Looking at the food lists, they are not that bad really - your son seems like the 'better' of the two. They do both seem to be getting something from each food group too. Can't say the same for poor Mouse's mindee though!

I do agree that children can have an effect on each other whether directly or indirectly. I had one mindee who wouldn't touch fruit/veg sticks of any kind. One day, I suddenly realised that as a result of this I had been offering cheese and breadsticks/crackers instead of fresh fruit and veg for snacks on the three days that he was here and so everyone's quota of fruit and veg had decreased.

As Bunyip says, excellent advice already given. I remember once when DD was going through a fussy stage I just happened to get back home much later than our usual tea time and so ended up serving her dinner about an hour later that usual. She ate every last bit - she was obviously starving! After that I pushed meal times back a bit and things improved for a while until the next fussy stage.

I'm sure you've analysed it already but also look at textures of food. Quite a few children don't like 'sloppy' food like cottage pie, or wet foods like casseroles. They usually do like crunchy foods though or food separated and not mixed together to form a particular dish.

Have you tried Annabel Karmel's golden veg and lentil soup? All mine have loved that one - I usually serve it with toast and sometimes they will just have a couple of dips to start off with or I will spread a thin layer of it onto their toast. They do usually want to lick the bowl though - not my recipe so I can't take credit! Hubby and I love it too so a good lunch for all. Just offer kids tiny portions and as Sarah said they can have seconds or you can freeze what you haven't served up.

Thanks Maza, you raise some really good points. I havent tried the golden veg and lentil soup but will do. My son will eat her cream of tomato one which has carrots in so thats good at least.

[mumofone]

Two is the age when they take control, food, potty training tantrums oh the joy.
I doas sarahdoes and serve small portions, read a story, sing songs, talk about our day, meal times are really chilled out times. Are they having much time between eating? I find early breakfast so 7:45 and lunch around 12 (earlier or later depending if children are asking) no snack in between. I always make sure they have been out for some physical exercise every day, such as a walk, play in the park, in the garden, soft play etc.
Pop the plate down with a smile, out comes the story book, we chat about the story and hopefully some of the dinner goes in, when I think they have had long enough all cleaned up and down from the table.

are we "allowed" to not give them snacks? I used to give my son three meals a day and no snacks but changed to giving snacks but this could well be part of the problem......

[moggy]

are we "allowed" to not give them snacks? I used to give my son three meals a day and no snacks but changed to giving snacks but this could well be part of the problem......

Yes, of course.
Children snacks as they are now are an invention of the children's food industry who make all mummies feel guilty if they don't have a bag of freeze-dried organic carrot crisps or overpriced individually wrapped yogurt covered organic strawberry chews.
3 meals a day and water in between.
I sometimes offer a snack (fruit or savoury) as a distraction when everyone needs a break (!), if someone's missed breakfast, or as part of an activity like stopping on a walk for a 'picnic' snack. Or if dinner is served late at home after mindee's gone then a snack to put them on. But routine snacks are not needed at all (unless some special dietary/medical reason).
They are a habit and probably one day they'll link them to childhood obesity, but probably that will be hushed up by the children's food manufacturers because they are a lovely moneymaker.

[mumofone]

Yes, of course.
Children snacks as they are now are an invention of the children's food industry who make all mummies feel guilty if they don't have a bag of freeze-dried organic carrot crisps or overpriced individually wrapped yogurt covered organic strawberry chews.
3 meals a day and water in between.
I sometimes offer a snack (fruit or savoury) as a distraction when everyone needs a break (!), if someone's missed breakfast, or as part of an activity like stopping on a walk for a 'picnic' snack. Or if dinner is served late at home after mindee's gone then a snack to put them on. But routine snacks are not needed at all (unless some special dietary/medical reason).
They are a habit and probably one day they'll link them to childhood obesity, but probably that will be hushed up by the children's food manufacturers because they are a lovely moneymaker.

Haha, yes don't get me started on those pre-packaged snacks!!! I swear parents think they're healthy but surely anything in a wrapper has been shoved full of sugar to make it tastier to children?!

[mumofone]

It sounds to me as if the parents don't follow a healthy eating plan, but expect you to do it even though they don't. They want their child to eat a healthy diet but aren't going to be the ones to enforce it.

Is mindee with you for their evening meal? What time do they go home? If possible I'd try to drop the evening meal and suggest parents give that at home. You can then use the limited foods they will eat to plan lunches. It would also mean you can concentrate in your son's evening meal without him being influenced by the other child.

If that's not possible I would try to lose the guilt about not being able to expand mindee's diet. There's only so much you can do but I'd rather give a child food I know they will eat rather than keep trying alternatives that end up in the bin. Use what they do like as a basis for meals and add in a small amount of something different each time. It might mean you're still throwing something away, but at least it won't be a whole meal that you've spent time preparing.

I'm having similar issues at the moment. I've had an 18 month old here for 5 weeks. When parents first came to see me we talked about the food I provide and they were very enthusiastic about it, saying what a lovely menu it was. The first couple of weeks here the child didn't eat anything. WHen I told parents they just said that she didn't eat much normally. I was still not getting anywhere so asked mum to provide me with a list of food mindee will eat. SHe said "oh, all she eats is yoghurt, crisps and raisins"! I said that when we'd discussed food they'd said how mindee would enjoy it all and mum said she'd never really tried any of it and they'd just hoped she'd eat it!
This child refuses to eat anything so I'm having to give her yoghurt, crisps and raisins Each day I try adding in a bit of cheese, ham, different fruit etc, but she won't eat any of it and I don't know what else I can do. Luckily I only give her lunch so I don't have to struggle with any other meals.

was wondering today whether your 8 mth old has expanded their diet at all mouse?
parents are insistent i keep doing meals for their child, every day child arrives telling me they've had chocolate on toast, chocolate biscuits etc etc - makes me so cross, how can i implement a healthy menu when the child just gets snacks and chocolate at home.

[mumofone]

It sounds to me as if the parents don't follow a healthy eating plan, but expect you to do it even though they don't. They want their child to eat a healthy diet but aren't going to be the ones to enforce it.

Is mindee with you for their evening meal? What time do they go home? If possible I'd try to drop the evening meal and suggest parents give that at home. You can then use the limited foods they will eat to plan lunches. It would also mean you can concentrate in your son's evening meal without him being influenced by the other child.

If that's not possible I would try to lose the guilt about not being able to expand mindee's diet. There's only so much you can do but I'd rather give a child food I know they will eat rather than keep trying alternatives that end up in the bin. Use what they do like as a basis for meals and add in a small amount of something different each time. It might mean you're still throwing something away, but at least it won't be a whole meal that you've spent time preparing.

I'm having similar issues at the moment. I've had an 18 month old here for 5 weeks. When parents first came to see me we talked about the food I provide and they were very enthusiastic about it, saying what a lovely menu it was. The first couple of weeks here the child didn't eat anything. WHen I told parents they just said that she didn't eat much normally. I was still not getting anywhere so asked mum to provide me with a list of food mindee will eat. SHe said "oh, all she eats is yoghurt, crisps and raisins"! I said that when we'd discussed food they'd said how mindee would enjoy it all and mum said she'd never really tried any of it and they'd just hoped she'd eat it!
This child refuses to eat anything so I'm having to give her yoghurt, crisps and raisins Each day I try adding in a bit of cheese, ham, different fruit etc, but she won't eat any of it and I don't know what else I can do. Luckily I only give her lunch so I don't have to struggle with any other meals.

Just wondered how your 18 month old is doing, is he eating more than yoghurt, crisps and raisins yet?!

[Mouse]

Just wondered how your 18 month old is doing, is he eating more than yoghurt, crisps and raisins yet?!

A couple of weeks ago mum told me they'd managed to get her to eat something else - carrot sticks. I was quite excited until I realised she meant those carrot crisp stick things!

I've persevered though and have managed to get her to eat half a slice of toast and some fruit puree mixed in with the yoghurt. Today I mixed in some pear puree and when she'd finished eating that I gave her some of the fruit puree on its own. She ate 3 spoons of it before realising what it was and refusing any more. It's a start though. Progress may be slow, but at least we're moving forward