after schooler bad language

[alex__17]

I have 3 after schooler girls age 6 so year 2, that come all together on a thurs, I have 2 of them other days no probs but all together on a thurs they get so over excited screaming throwing toys, wrestling etc all I do is nag.
So this week I sat them down said I'm fed up of constantly telling them off and they are to write their own rules we'll stick up and if they break any they can go and read them to remind themselves and if they stick to them they get a sticker on my reward chart.
All going great and one of them says no swear words, I said I should hope not, let's write no rude words as we don't want younger ones copying. One says I don't know any swear words and then another leans over and whispers one in her ear! She admitted to me she had when I asked her and said sorry and looked pretty upset and I think it was a case of acting without thinking of the consequences and I said I'd have to tell her parents as it wasn't acceptable especially as they'd just come up with it as something they didn't think they should do!
Anyway apart from that behaviour amazing compared to normal, she didn't get her sticker, but wasn't opportunity to speak to her parent at pickup as 4 others also collected at same time and wasn't chance.
Has anyone got advice for dealing with this? An email to mum? I bump into her at school but don't think it's very professional to discuss it there, but a friend collects Monday and dad Thursday when it's mayhem with collecting and to be honest I don't want to dredge it all back up as I'm hoping it was a one off.
Any advice welcome, not had to deal with this before, parents are so lovely I don't think the language came from them in a million years which makes it harder to bring it up as I think they'll be mortified!

[sarah707]

I remember at that age ds came up to me and said a swear word or 2 - I was horrified and he realised that and never said it again - turns out he had been dared by a 'friend'.

I spoke to him and felt it was dealt with I didn't need to tell his dad or drag it out - it was done and over and not mentioned again... do you think it was a one-off? x

[AliceK]

Personally on this one occasion I wouldn't mention it to parents. If she uses bad language on a regular basis that would be different but it doesn't sound like she does and the fact that she whispered it makes me think that she knows it isn't something she should say. If a child has done something minor and I've had words and dealt with it I don't bother parents with it, only if it's something major or repeated bad behaviour do I say something. In this instance I would give her the benefit of the doubt.
xxx

[CSR2014]

Hi,
I would let it go on this occasion and only bring it up if it reoccurs. I think all kids have little blips. I went through a very minor phase of shoplifting (not a word to Ofsted!) when I was about five and it was definitely a blip as I am too honest for my own good these days so would think it will be the same with the effing and jeffing!!

[alex__17]

Thank you, that's what I needed to hear as drafting an email it did seem very minor and almost like I was telling tales and dwelling on it, and a telling off from her parents may not really help as it's hopefully over and done with. I think I'll do a reminder of what I expect and the rules they set themselves next thurs and hope it doesn't happen again, I just dread a 3 year old going home talking about so and so saying the f-word...would be mortified!

[Simona]

Thank you, that's what I needed to hear as drafting an email it did seem very minor and almost like I was telling tales and dwelling on it, and a telling off from her parents may not really help as it's hopefully over and done with. I think I'll do a reminder of what I expect and the rules they set themselves next thurs and hope it doesn't happen again, I just dread a 3 year old going home talking about so and so saying the f-word...would be mortified!

Good choice...get the children talking themselves about the use of bad language and the rules ...hear what they say.

I don't think that in 21 years I have ever had a child growing up....pushing the barriers without swearing...it is part of their development and children will get to understand where it is not appropriate to use it and why....parents will know that too.

Good luck

[alex__17]

Again thank you, I think I was also just shocked as they're only 6, seems so young yet they seem so grown up too when things like this happen, and my own son is only 2 so I've not had to experience any of this yet!

[Samijanec]

I think you've done the right thing, one chance then if it happens again speak to parents. X