Advice needed b4 1.30pm

[tori4]

So will keep short n sweet

I'm after some advice - parent is having lots of unwanted behaviour at home, child not sleeping, child wetting n soiling self, distributive behaviour, unruly behaviour fights with sibling and parents and in mums words "completely unmanageable."

Here however- apart from occasionally a little vacant

lovely, well manner, does as I ask (when LO hears) joins in activities for long periods, no accidents, asks and goes when I ask etc tec etc

At nursery b4 sch holidays nursery a had no concerns their words "she is so easy"

My only LD concern is the toilet training did take a while and LO understanding not gr8 esp 2part instructions child is 3in November

Child answers a lot of conversation with the last word I said.

So mum is at end of tether - going call HV - but how can I support or offer any advice if I'm just not seeing it??

Older sibling has "some" SEN needs although I hve never seen abt paperwork to confirm - I'm worried mum is looking for an answer in all the wrong places - both parents have just started working within the last 12mnths

mum esp works ALOT - days, evenings, weekends etc etc -

I feel it's LO just kicking out cause she wants time and attention with Mum ...

Can I say this? How can I say this politely? How can I say this to nursery and HV professionally?

What else can I say ?

Any suggestions would be great xT

[hectors house]

Agree it sounds like the little one is attention seeking - try to persuade the mum to reward good behaviour and try to ignore some of the bad behaviour (unless it's dangerous). Could mum set the cooker timer for 30 mins and say to child "I need to do some tidying up/cooking etc, when the timer goes off it's my turn to play with you or read a story etc"

[VeggieSausage]

I often suggest to parents that one of the ways to combat challenging behaviour is with a strict routine and so children have to work within the boundaries, they know what is expected of them, feel safe and everyone is expecting the same behaviour from them to limiting some of the pushing of boundaries.

I agree it sounds like it might be attention seeking behaviour but I would also signpost to a health visitor for a hearing check, children with poor hearing can have trouble with communication and forming relationships and can 'act out' in a hope of getting some attention as they unsure how to get it in other ways.

Starting with the HV is a good starting point for a hearing test i think and a general once over and work with parents to establish strict routine in both places - you can't make parents spend more time with their children though and they may need the money.

[gwm]

I know your timelimit has elapsed but I have another suggestion. Perhaps the little one is NOT getting any quality attention at home and maybe she is just frustrated at being forgotton about/ignored. Working parents have limited home time....we all know that but, a little child is not bothered or aware that mum and dad are time short. As the child's behaviour is not an issue at playgroup/nursery/childminder then, I would suggest that maybe mum and dad squeeze a one to one session with her every evening and give her the time she is obviously craving.

[tori4]

Thank u all or ur replies. - all what I thought and have suggested

Tighter routine
Quality time
Reward gd behaviour

Mum has spoken to HV and they are coming out - I have suggestion hearing check and poss signpost for SLT due to limited understanding - however she is meeting and within all LD just ...

I alway try to offer a balance of 'entertainment' /attention and free play but it's our job to be with Los doing stuff etc - I understand Mum/dad jobs and general life are busy and makes this hard so never mean to encourage 'high maintained children '

Thanks again,

meeting with mum went well and will wait and see went HV say