do any of you not go to groups?

[ziggy]

Have been going to same toddler group for 9years. Live in small village so not alot of chance to get out and about and meet others.

Only had one little one this morning (usually have 3) so we went along as usual. Friend who usually helps run group wasnt able to stay. There must have been about 9 or 10 mums and another childminder. The other minder and myself got chatting but others just sat and hardly spoke.

Even mindee got bored after 45mins so we went to the shop and came home.

I often feel if I dont make effort to chat no one else would and to be totally honest just cant be bothered some weeks.

Anyway point to this ranting is do others bother going to groups or just stay home and do activities? Will have 2 babies in January and not sure I can be bothered taking them out in bad weather to just sit in a circle of mums who make no effort to socialise

[Maza]

I suppose it depends how good the activities on offer are. Our One 0'Clock Club was like you described but the children loved the outdoor space there and so I just played with my mindees. We also have the opposite - a group where the toys are okay (just toys, no focused activities) but the people there are really lovely (children and adults). I wouldn't bother going otherwise. I would just say go when you feel like a change of scenery but don't feel like you have to go every week. It does get you down when you feel like you are the only one initiating conversation all the time. I'm struggling to get to any groups at the moment due to drop off times/nap times/school run etc and I must say I am starting to miss the groups.

[kellyskidz!]

I've cut a lot of groups out since the 6week hols, we were just doing too much and i was spending too much money on groups
We were going to one every day and sometimes 2 in a day at one point and I was hardly ever in. I think parents are happier now I'm home more, even though none of them have said anything
Now its colder I'm glad we stay in and make use of the resources I've spent money on to play here, instead of them just gathering dust while we go to endless groups and only touch base at home time
We do still go to one or two groups to stop me going mad and to get them out and about but I'm really happy now I'm doing my own thing and only occasionally dropping in at groups instead of living at them. I'm sure other minders felt under pressure to go to these groups to be 'in' with other minders but I'm still friendly with everyone, just not in their pockets
I think it depends on you, and what you and the kids are happiest doing, if they don't like the groups maybe have a few weeks off and see how you feel after that, maybe go back in the New Year xx

[clairer]

I try to go on the days I have mindees but it's hard if you don't know many people, it's good to chat to other minders. I think if all the activities have worn thin after half an hour that's ok, just stay half an hour, it's nice to get out for a bit and then pop and get some milk from the shop.

We occasionally stay in if the mindees or myself are particulary tired, everyone needs a chilling out day now and again. We then may bake or get the paints out. Or we may miss a group to go to the park on a sunny day.

[loocyloo]

i go to a few groups, but not every week. I have siblings who come 3 days a week, and then rest come one day each, so if I always went to the same group, some children wouldn't do anything else! plus, several are held in the same place, so its boring to go there all the time! I usually go to one a week, but sometimes none! oddly though, considering I live in a small place, the majority of people attending each group is different!

I've always got so much I want to do out & about that it would be easy not to go to any groups, but I think the children need to be in a bigger social group sometimes, plus I need to talk to adults!

[Glitter]

I don't go to any groups. I did not enjoy groups when I took my own children as no one really interacted, and I don't want to go back to that.
None of the children I look after come full time and I know they all attend groups with their mothers. I do take the children to the library, playground, museums, and shops so they have a chance to interact with other people.

If I had a full time child I would have to look at taking them to a group, but until then I don't see the need to.

[cathtee]

I only work 4 days, we do 2 days playgroup 1 day soft play and 1 day day at home and I must admit I like a day in when I can do planned activities, the children like a day when we're not in and out all day

[tulip0803]

I do one or two days a week at the local family centre. I go there every Thursday for Ti a FI (Welsh toddler group) as I speak only some Welsh and it is part of the learning areas in Wales. Next week we will go on Tuesday to (went this week as well) as the library bus comes there that day too. I am in a small village so it is only this or travel 14 miles to next town for soft play of 7 miles to little town with a couple of other groups. So we are mainly home doing cooking, playing, crafts, etc and trips to park, river, woods, museums, castles etc

[yummyripples]

I go out every morning. I go to at least one or two playgroups a week to enable the children to be around other children and also play with different toys. We go to the library every two/three weeks. Swimming weekly. Dance groups. Soft play. Park once a week at least as well as farms, museums, art galleries or even just a trip to the shops.
We stay at home every afternoon and very occasionally in the morning. I try not to socialise too much as I find it detracts me from my job

[Daisy De]

I quite like the groups but I'm lucky as there are so many of them we can pick and choose what we feel like on the day as they are all different. I don't go every day either.

No reason why you should go every week though, if I were in your situation I would go once in a while for a change of scenery but certainly wouldn't feel obliged to go.

The other thing that makes me smile is like you Ziggy I am older (50) and everyone assumes I am granny to all of my multi-culture mindees or worse the mother of the childminder friend I go with!

[AliceK]

I currently don't go to any. I have tried many and for one reason or another none have suited so at the moment I don't do any. We get out and about though and have regular play dates with another childminder up the road too.

xxxxx

[Pixie dust]

I don't go to any groups, I used to go to a childminder group(4 other childminders) but I felt like the odd one out as they would plan different activities and then I would get told at the last minute "can you bring xyz this week as we are making ......" I did try and offer my ideas but it was made pretty clear they wanted to make the decisions, I stuck it out for a while for my mindees as I wanted them to mix with other children but in the end I stopped going. It's really sad that people can be like that especially in a job that can be quite lonely at times.

[hectors house]

I went to the same toddler group for about 5 years but in the end I stopped going as I got fed up each September losing all the parents and children I got on well when they went to school - last September there ended up being a lot of strange mothers with strange parenting ideas and I felt I didn't have anything in common with them anymore - just because one mum didn't want her children to have weak squash then everyone had to have water and the same with biscuits - my mindees don't have biscuits with me at home but I felt that everyone was expected to change because of this parent. Anyway they must have off lots of existing and new parents as the group has now closed down due to lack of support!

Do you drive ziggy, are there any other groups in other towns, villages you could try? - I'm going to another group now which is run by 2 childminders but in a village hall and open to everyone, it has a lovely atmostphere, good crafts, toys, garden & outdoor space in the summer, singing and stories at the end - I think I like the fact that it has some structure.

[PixiePetal]

I don't go any more. The one I went to with my own children and then mindees for 16 years stopped having CMs as we were holding lots of spaces up and they do have a lunchtime CM club there on another day. I don't go to lunch club due to trouble I had with certain CMs and same goes for the local CM group - if those CMs give up and move on I will go back!

I go to soft play every now and then and to a farm park when it's nice as it takes ages on the buses from my village.

Friends who CM come over to play and I go to meet them so we do not stay in all the time alone

[sarah707]

I go through phases with them!

I used to go to the Children's Centre but they've kicked us out - the children enjoy soft play so we go there - there's a really good music group I ought to go to more often ...

Most of the time we are in our own little routine. We go for walks, visit the park, have friends round etc and we are so busy that we don't have time for groups

[critch]

I do the following and all in the morning:
Monday - play and stay childrens centre which is very structured and covers 7 areas of learning
Tuesday - toddlers at local village hall
Wednesday - music and movement childrens centre again structured to all 7 areas
Thursday - different every week, pet shop or library or just a quick nip to shops etc
Friday - play and stay as per Monday but different venue but if something on at school we go there instead or soft play

I tend to stay in during the afternoon when they all have naps and free play apart from Friday we do activity as child doesn't nap this is sometimes messy play or a trip to the park!

All above is tto as they all close during holidays!

[Bluebell]

it depends on the children and what they do on other days - I have a lot that come only 1 day and especially the older ones who are 4 and go to pre-school on other days I don't feel that a playgroup can offer them anything, on the other hand younger children can get a lot out of it.
There is one group that a lot of childminders go to and I don't work on that day anymore so I really miss that as it was a chance to see other people and it was a good one for the kids.

[FloraDora]

I don't plan to go to groups, except focus ones periodically like music or story telling or tumble tots type activity - I am experienced in Forest schools so plan to be out and about as much as I can, luckily I live 50 yards away from a nature reserve so lots of opportunities on my doorstep.

My question would be : what does OfSTED think about going to playgroups?? Is it a big plus if you do?

[bindy]

Never go to any groups, just not for me, but I take the kids to different places, farm, soft play, whipsnade etc I meet with my own child minder friends in the parks and for play dates

[TNT]

I go to 1 group every week, i tend to go to more in the winter when the weather is really bad, i would go crazy if i didnt getout and meet other adults. There are lots around here and I know most of the people that go as I have my own small children so I enjoy them.I also like the fact that the children I mind get to know the other children they will go to preschool or school with while they are there, they form different friendships which I think is important. We also go to the woods, soft play, duck ponds and (free) art galleries regularly.
Most of my business has come through playgroups, or the local park.