How young is too young?

[lorettacritchet]

Hi, I am just doing a short PACEY course about behaviour. It says you shouldn't punish young children etc or use the "time out area". How young is too young in your opinion?

For example I have had a 2 year old who regularly pushes and snatches, after two warnings, I put her on the naughty step. Is that too young? Am I doing it wrong managing this type of behaviour?

From there I have a just turned one year old who isn't walking but attempts to bite sometimes. He of course doesn't go on the naughty step as he is still only bum shuffling but he gets pulled away from the group playing if I see him try something like this and he is told off.

[jellybellys]

Never too young to discipline/set boundaries. u simply adjust how you do it dependent in the child's age/ understanding. My friend cares for a 2yrold from 18m who's parents didnt believe in any discipline until after 2 as he wouldn't understand. Far from it, he knows exactly what he's doing and has been and still is a total nightmare! Look in eyfs, in 16-26 in (I think) psed it says beginning to understand boundaries like no.

[bunyip]

The 3 rules of behaviour management:-

1. At some point in time, all behaviour management techniques are CORRECT.
2. At some point in time, all behaviour management techniques are INCORRECT.
3. At any single moment in time, only one technique will be FASHIONABLE.

[Mouse]

I suppose it depends on your approach. I've never used a naughty step or time out step for any of my own children or minded children.

For younger children I tend to remove them from the situation - move them away from the play, sit them with me. I also use distraction techniques - if they're snatching toys I will tell them why they can't have it (X is playing with it) and give them something else to play with.

I don't have any hang ups about saying no to them, or telling them to stop doing something. If they take a toy I tell them to give it back. From quite an early age they understand the 'look'! If they take a toy I only need to say their name & give them the look. More often than not they hand it back! For your two year old who pushes, I would say a firm "no!" and after a couple of warnings would tell them to go & play with something else. If need be I pick them up & carry them to another activity.

I think with behaviour management we're always so scared of doing the wrong thing, or an unaccepted thing. You need to figure out what works for you and what the children respond to, then have the confidence in yourself to be consistent in your approach.

[sarah707]

I think most little ones understand when they are briefly taken away from play that they have done something unacceptable - at what age they put that together with a cross face or words depends on the child and their age / stage of understanding.

Some 2 year olds get it - others don't. Some 3 year olds laugh at you...

All behaviour management strategies need to be combined with others - and all can be useful depending on the child

[KatieFS]

I use a look, a firm no thank you, I do move them away from play. I use a reflection spot for older children (time out) but overall try and recognise good behaviour and encourage that with rewards like choosing activity or snack etc
If I'm having any difficulty with a child I advise parents and ask what they do at home too. I tell them what I will do here so that (hopefully) we can be consistent

[Tinkerbell1979]

The 3 rules of behaviour management:-

[*]At some point in time, all behaviour management techniques are CORRECT.[*]At some point in time, all behaviour management techniques are INCORRECT.[*]At any single moment in time, only one technique will be FASHIONABLE.

So true !!!

[nikki thomson]

[QUOTE="lorettacritchet;1256480"]Hi, I am just doing a short PACEY course about behaviour. It says you shouldn't punish young children etc or use the "time out area". How young is too young in your opinion?

For example I have had a 2 year old who regularly pushes and snatches, after two warnings, I put her on the naughty step. Is that too young? Am I doing it wrong managing this type of behaviour?

From there I have a just turned one year old who isn't walking but attempts to bite sometimes. He of course doesn't go on the naughty step as he is still only bum shuffling but he gets pulled away from the group playing if I see him try something like this and he is told off.[/QUOTE

What ever your views or opinions don't let ofsted hear you call it the naughty step as they'll have a fit, they really don't like them.
Try reflection or thinking area away from others. X

[JCrakers]

I have a time out/thinking area which is not a specific place. The child is taken away from the situation if they have persistently not done as asked then they sit and think about their behaviour.
I use it for children over 2.5/3yrs depending on the child, whether they will benefit from it, have an understanding of it. For older children I use it to sit and think for a few minutes depending on age.

[Optimalstar]

All children are individuals and what works for one doesn't always work for another. My now 18 year old daughter would have sat on the 'naughty step' all day just to prove the point that she didn't care that she had to sit there. Rewards work brilliantly with my own 3 yr old as she loves stickers but my 2 year old wouldn't thank you for one. My eldest never liked being ignored and responded to being the 'big ( boy/ brother)'. My 10 year old just doesn't like to be in trouble at all so I only have to look at her.

The knack is to find what works and be consistent.

Oh and in answer to the naughty step/ time out, my 2 year old gets it. He hates being removed and put on the step.