Unhealthy computer obsession

[Helen Dempster]

Morning all - bit drizzly and cold here in Kent today, hope it's a bit nicer where you are!

My question.... I have 2 sibling boy mindees - one is 6yo and one is 10yo and they are both obsessed with the computer/computer games, esp Minecraft. It's all they ever talk about! As soon as they get here it's "can I go on the computer?" and as soon as they are picked up they say to their parents "can I go on Xbox" (or equivalent). They're social skills are lacking and I'm sure this isn't helped by the computer! I've altered things while they're here, they are both allowed one hour in the morning and one hour in the afternoon, no more. However, the oldest boy once his hour is up in the morning, then spends the rest of his time asking if he can have his afternoon hour early, or what the time is, so he can go back on. Drives me mad! I'm constantly giving them other things to do and lecturing them about all the other things in the world other than computer games. I find the youngest one isn't as bad when his brother isn't here (not very often!) but when they're together they fight over who's going on the computer constantly! The tears and tantrums I had yesterday from them both drove me to distraction, I was so glad when they went home!!!! I take them to the park every day so they can get some exercise which the youngest one loves, but the 10yo just moans and constantly asks "can we go now" or "can I go on the computer when we get back".

I don't really know what to do - would you ban the computer completely, or keep up with the 1hr morning, 1hr afternoon?

I have my own DS who isn't so computer obsessed and will happily play and I feel so sorry for him as he tries to get the 6yo to play games with him, but when it's not his 'time' on the computer, all he wants to do is sit and watch his brother on the computer!!! I've also got another 3 mindees to consider, and I'm fed up of them hearing the boys argue and fight all the time, it doesn't create a very nice atmosphere.

Please someone heeeeeeelp!!!!!!

[breezy]

I think I'd be inclined to say no computer. Or no computer this week and if they can get on nicely without it this week then next week reintroduce an hour each in the morning next week and then if that works, reintroduce the afternoon hour. Also if they're not on the computer they cant watch the others, they have to do other things.

I couldnt be doing with all that bickering about it!!!

[christine e]

Think it is time to unplug and pack away!

[JCrakers]

I have the same here. Not so much as you have but most of the afterschool boys are obsessed with wii,tv.

I have 8 boys throughout the week,6 of which ask all the time. I let them put it on at 430 and by the time they've all had a go it's probably 520-30

School holidays I don't have as many and I do allow it in the morning for an hour and eve for an hour if they want to. The bickering I wouldn't stand for. If they can't get on (very difficult when they are brothers) then I would take it off them for a day, give it back see how it goes and then if they can do it without arguing then carry on from there, if not ban it for another day.

my own son who is 13yrs plays on his xbox a lot which I am concerned about but he is online chatting with lots of friends so I know he's not alone. I feel bad that I'm working while he's up in his room but he's older and really I can't do anything to amuse him while I'm working. He does go out and we do a lot at weekends, bike riding etc. He does go out to the scooter park when friends are abailable.

[Kiddleywinks]

Think it is time to unplug and pack away!

Mine would definately be 'broken' for a week, and then put out the board games we had to play with when we were younger - ludo, snakes and ladders etc, or fuzzy felt, or lego - especially with this bloomin' weather.

A firm favourite here is rapidough, we have hours, and I mean hours, of fun with it, and I believe there's now a 'younger' version out with easier words (have you ever tried modelling a horse and cart with a pea sized piece of dough )

[BucksCM]

Agree...turn it off completely!
I'm lucky, no pc for children to play on. Laptop is MINE and NO children allowed on it! TV in other room...the children have no choice during the day. Room full of toys and games...park down the road.
In fact, surprisingly, the boys love to do craft stuff! My "lively" one will sit for ages doing hama beads!!

[little chickee]

I too think i would have a computer ban.
Total ban across the board for everyone.

Just say its got a virus, or broken or something. This would be easier than explaining why you are really doing it cos i think they would still whinge about going on.

You know that they will get their computer/ xbox time at home so i do not think it is at all unreasonable to expect them to amuse themselves a different way at yours.

I also would make this no computer rule permanent, they will soon adjust.

[singingcactus]

If you are not able to get them to play, then there are minecraft toys for sale on ebay. There is a magnet pack - of the minecraft squares - so the kids can create their own fridge environment. There is also a foam iron sword, and a foam iron axe. We are hoping that more toys will come soon.
Maybe also if you could save your boxes and have the kids decorate them to represent all the minecraft elements then the kids could create the 3D minecraft world.
If the kids interests are there, then it will be no use trying to force them to enjoy something like snap etc. Just try to find other ways for them to extend the pay of their interests.
Kids who enjoy this kind of game tend to enjoy facts and details, so games like top trumps may be a way to go for something different.


(as an aside, go to you tube and search for 100 ways to die in minecraft, the kids will love it and it is something they will all watch at the same time, and talk about for ages. Oh, and it's not as gruesome as the search makes it sound so don't you all be panicking about the word die)

[rickysmiths]

Mine would definately be 'broken' for a week, and then put out the board games we had to play with when we were younger - ludo, snakes and ladders etc, or fuzzy felt, or lego - especially with this bloomin' weather.

A firm favourite here is rapidough, we have hours, and I mean hours, of fun with it, and I believe there's now a 'younger' version out with easier words (have you ever tried modelling a horse and cart with a pea sized piece of dough )

I agree. I don't have a computer for mindees at all (there are some things the parents have to do with them ) or any Computer Games.

I would be going on outings to a museum that may interest the older ones once a week, or swimming if you are able to get assistance, but also the board games, lego, Knex etc.