fees for my brother and sister

[maluvsya89]

hi, i started as a childminder a few months ago but prior to that i gave up my old job (nhs support worker) my new flat (which i lived in for 2months) and moved an hour away from all my friends, where i grew up etc to nanny my half brother and sister (twins 1years at time) i did this for a year but i wanted to earn money and get my own space back again as i lived away for 5years! my parents pay me £600 a month to look after the twins, i start at 8 and finish (suppose to ) at 6 pm. but im finding i am having to get up even earlier as they leave them in bed for me to deal with (baring in mind i start at 8 and i have other mindees coming at 8am) i also get sent texts in the evening as i am in my room asking to check on them if they wake up crying etc. i have been looking at moving out very soon by my area is so expensive and for a 2 bed house it will cost nearly 1000pm. the only problem is do i ask my parents for more money as i charge £4 ph and only get paid £600pm for the twins worked out im loosing over a grand i will also move the childminding to my own place!!!! they also left it too late and i have to wait till sep2013 for them to go to nursery, when they promised me it will be jan 2013 as they turn 3 in october and i will be able to take on other children and earn extra money... so do i ask for more money and how do i do it???? please help been stressing for days!!!! x

[Tatjana]

So, you're living in your parents house and looking after their twins...do you have to pay rent/food? They're not paying you very much for all the work you're doing BUT I don't know the ins and outs of the whole situation eg they could argue your staying rent free with food included.

Sorry but not knowing your whole circumstances it's difficult to comment.

[The Juggler]

i was going to say the same as Tatjana. if you are paying the going rate of rent and bills etc, I agree they should pay your full hourly rate. However, if you are paying a nominal rent and bills I would see this as the same as them paying you a reduced rate of childcare. Plus they are allowing you to run your business from their home (with the extra wear and tear).

I would say you need to chat to them about it honestly hon

[maluvsya89]

Well I mentioned I'm moving into my own place and moving the childminding there at the moment I don't mind the money as my rent n food comes out of it as I pay for my phone n toiletries my self but I did state when I move out and moving the business to my own home. I brought it up with them that I want my own place and they spoke about maybe moving to a bigger home with a separate annex type joint to it where I can live and look after the twins still. Don't think they realise that moving out for five years and moving back in is quite hard. And they must know that I'm going to ask for extra money or they wouldn't think about moving to a bigger house etc. I only thinking of asking for another 100 quid as it will make that little bit of difference

[Bridey]

Paying you an extra £100 a month would be infinitely cheaper than moving house!

[miffy]

Paying you an extra £100 a month would be infinitely cheaper than moving house!

Definitely! Perhaps that is the way to sell it to them

Miffy xx

[blue bear]

If you are moving out surely you need to change the arrangement to a business one, you have been very good moving home and I'm sure they have appreciated the reduced childcare bill your arrangement has given them but surely they knew it might end one day.
They obviously enjoy the arrangement hence offering an annex arrangement,you need to sit down and explain how you are feeling regarding independence etc, maybe they don't realise you need to fly the nest(again)

How will you be able to pay your bills if you offer such a massive discount for the twins after all at even £7oo a month for 48 weeks ( assuming you have 4 weeks holidays unpaid) its only £1.75 per hour per child.

It's time to sit down and have a honest chat with your parents, not easy I'm sure but you can't leave them assuming you are content with the current arrangement if you're not. I'd want my children to tell me how they feel and I'm sure you're parents do too and only want the best for you.

[Goatgirl]

Hi ,
I agree, you need to talk to them. I would want the out of hours expectation that you will manage the children's getting up etc to be cleared up. They are not your children.

i think boundaries etc can get very fuzzy with family, especially when you're living there too so I would have a chat about how you feel things should be and how to go forward.

Agree that parents are unlikely to realise how important it is to you to need your own space, independence etc. Also think full charge should be made if you move out, but if they're absorbing some of your living costs against childcare they probably wont see this as a problem unless you point it out.

The tricky bit is how to earn enough while you're dependent on them for living expenses to actualy move out and charge them full price

I'm sure you can work something out though. Good luck

[maluvsya89]

cheers for all your reply s, i want to move out with my partner so bills wouldnt be a problem and this is with my parents sticking at £600pm it just means we won't have any luxuries at all and cutting down on bills like no internet. i have already said no to a car they offered to buy due to the fact i wont be able to afford it when i move out.
i brought up the subject of moving out again and they said that they have been thinking about moving away completely... i live in oxford and they are thinking linclon! again they said they will get a bigger property or a property with an annex but ive just set up my childminding business and have settled in the area after being here for nearly two years and leaving my old life behind to start with the twins. also my partner doesnt want to move either! such a pickle i really don't know what to do now!
completely of subject i know but need to moan...

[Goatgirl]

HI again ,
I didn't realise you were thinking about moving out with a partner: of course you don't want to move as far as Lincoln in that case

If money to afford to move out is not a problem I would just say 'I am moving out', not that you're 'thinking about it' and explain you will be charging a higher rate for childcare. Just make a plan and tell them

I wouldn't just charge the same rate as you are now: they're probably spending quite a bit having you at home so would be saving this when you move out.

After all, you could fill those under 5 spaces with full paying mindees once you have your own place set up.

Good luck ,
Wendy

[maluvsya89]

o yes will be moving out with my partner no way will i be able to afford things on my own.

i like your idea about doing a plan and set it out in front of them at the end of the day i have done them a massive favour so lets hope they help me out a bit.. i dont think they will say no cause they know they are getting a good deal with having somebody so flexible a family member and cheap rates they wont get that any where els round here.. fingers cross

cheers