First dealings with Parents and fee quibbling

**Dilly Daydream** · 23-07-2012, 02:10 PM

Hi

I met my first family at the weekend with a view to caring for 2 siblings.

I have already looked at and reduced my hourly rate, altered my fee structure for holidays etc to try and gain their business as for me what the family is looking for fits in well with my families circumstances.

I altered my hourly rate/fee structure after looking at it hard - I can still make a decentish wage from this but the mother is pushing for more.

I have left it at that and told her I cant move anymore as I still have to earn a living and there were a few comments in conversation since that has left me with an uneasy feeling.

I just feel a little disheartened that I am giving up a well paid job (that I hate) to do something I want to do at a reduced rate of pay - but then to have this mum quibble over an already reduced hourly rate and better T&Cs leaves me feeling drained and I am questioning if I am doing the right thing?!?

I guess if nothing else I have learnt that I am not negotiating again - if they dont like my hourly rate then they can go elsewhere. But this mum seems to think I should be offering more of a reduction for the 2nd child (cos her current minder does?!?)?

So I am going to ask the question - what is your "sibling discount" what are your T&Cs for fees for holiday/sickness etc?

I just need to figure out if this mum is just chancing it, if her current minder is genuinely charging as little as she says (almost a third cheaper than me and I am cheap for this area!!) or am I being unreasonable in what I am charging?

Many Thanks
Helen

***Katrina*** · 23-07-2012, 02:19 PM

Hello,

I am in Devon and charge £3.50 per hour with 50p discount for a sibling (so second child is £3.00 per hour).
Parents pay full fees for their holidays and their/child sickness.
I don't charge for my holidays or sickness but I know lots of childminders do at least half fees for their holidays, if not full fees (was advised this at my pre-reg course).

BucksCM · 23-07-2012, 02:32 PM

I try not to give a discount!! Taking up 2 spaces so paying for two spaces! If parent tries then sometimes i will, but not a lot. Depends on how they ask really

I think this parent is trying it on with you. Just because you are newly registered. You are running a business and they are your charges...end of!

**Demonjill** · 23-07-2012, 02:36 PM

Aggghhh stand your ground!

I have just put my fees up to £4 per hour -was £3.80 for ages! Although one of my parents still pays £3.80 l as she is nice pays well and don't want to lose her child but I will increase her fees just not yet lol

I have a TTO who pays £4.60 per hour (but was willing to pay up to £7 lol

)

I charge when they are on holiday Or Ill and it's Full fee as I'm still able to provide the service but no fee if I'm I'll or on holiday

I don't do a sibling discount never have but wouldn't say never will as ..(like you have found) we sometimes need to secure the business
...but if you reduce any more I'm sure you will regret it and this is already showing that the parent does not respect you!! And then that could mean more trouble in future.
I would have alarm bells ringing with this one go with my gut instinct and call her bluff!

**Bridey** · 23-07-2012, 02:40 PM

I do not give a discount for siblings. Just because they are related does not mean there is any less paperwork or work for me, so why should I? If they leave then that's suddenly two places I have to fill!

I also charge full fee if they are on holiday or sick - no fee if I'm sick or away.

If her current minder is so reasonable and wonderful then why is she leaving? I don't take on anyone who quibbles my fees. Its what I charge - take it or leave it. The moment you show a sign of weakness then a lot of parents will just walk all over you in every aspect of what you do ...

**AliceK** · 23-07-2012, 02:42 PM

I don't offer a sibling discount at all. If anything siblings are more hard work plus if they leave you loose 2 lots of fees. They don't take any less work than any other child, they don't eat any less, the parent doesn't require you to give less care to one, so why on earth should you give any discount.

I charge 50% for childs holiday providing they give me at least 4 weeks notice otherwise it's full-fees. No fees for my holidays.

I would seriously be concerned if a parent was arguing about money at this early stage after you have already given her a discount. Stand your ground.

xxxx

**funemnx** · 23-07-2012, 02:53 PM

No sibling discounts from me either, I did with my first family (the oldest child got the 15p p/hr discount as she was at school so less loss)

I charge if they are on holiday or off sick

I don't charge for Bank holidays, my holidays or my sick days

I charge £3.25 which is average here (moving towards £3.50)

If you take them on perhaps you could put up your fees every year until they catch up with everyone else

**VeggieSausage** · 23-07-2012, 02:57 PM

No no sibling discount for me and I charge £5 per hour plus food......stand your ground, she won't be able to negotiate other childminders down and defo not a nursery.....what a cheek!

**sarahjane** · 23-07-2012, 03:34 PM

I also don't do sibling discount, although I've always said if I had 2 full time siblings I would offer 10% discount to the eldest, but that situation has never happened.
I also charge full price for their holidays and sickness and nothing for mine.

I think she's chancing her arm here and you need to stand your ground. I know you need the business - but do you really need THIS business?

**caz3007** · 23-07-2012, 03:39 PM

I would consider a sibling discount but only 50p an hour less for the younger one.

My holidays and parents holidays are both 50%. I dont charge for BH cos I wont work and I dont charge for my sickness, but child sickness is full pay.

You will be resentful if you drop any more and if they dont like your terms then they can look elsewhere but it does make me wonder why they are parting company with their current minder x

**loocyloo** · 23-07-2012, 04:20 PM

Originally Posted by caz3007

I would consider a sibling discount but only 50p an hour less for the younger one.

My holidays and parents holidays are both 50%. I dont charge for BH cos I wont work and I dont charge for my sickness, but child sickness is full pay.

You will be resentful if you drop any more and if they dont like your terms then they can look elsewhere but it does make me wonder why they are parting company with their current minder x

if you do charge a discount, charge it for the older child ( then when they go to school you are still getting full fees for younger mindee

)

i give a discount to the oldest child for siblings if BOTH children attend for a minimum of 25hrs a week.

my fees include all meals and outings for preschoolers.

i charge full fees for mindees holiday and sickness, and none for mine. i charge a higher TTO rate that incorporates half fees for holidays! i am going to be putting up my fulltime rates soon, and that will be to incorporate half fees for my holidays ( although i won't be telling them particuarly thats what the fee increase is for! ) i charge usual fees for BH ( but don't currently work a monday anyway! ) and triple time if required to work! (never have yet!)

**Ripeberry** · 23-07-2012, 05:01 PM

I used to give a sibling discount of 20p but I've just put up my rates and I'm not giving a discount anymore as why should I lose out just so that the parents can go on about all the new stuff they have bought when they were having to pay out SO much for childcare?

**wendywu** · 23-07-2012, 05:15 PM

I don't offer a sibling discount at all.

**caz3007** · 23-07-2012, 05:29 PM

Originally Posted by loocyloo

if you do charge a discount, charge it for the older child ( then when they go to school you are still getting full fees for younger mindee

)

!)

I typed the wrong thing, I do it for the older child, but was rushing to type a reply quickly

**Stapleton83** · 23-07-2012, 05:44 PM

Stand your ground and call her bluff.

If her existing CM is that fantastic I would ask her why she is looking for a new one

I would agree if you have offered a discount only do it on the elder one but don't go any lower. If she wants the places tell her to take it or leave it. Alternatively tell her that's the deal and she's got x number of days to think about it as you have someone else coming to see you

The only other thing you could do is work out the childcare cost and divide it by 12 to average it out for her if that helps BUT if you do be sure to put a clause in that allows you to recoup for the hours you have worked if either of you end the contract.

Sam x

**Dilly Daydream** · 23-07-2012, 09:15 PM

Thank you all for your suportive replies - you are all working the same way I plan to so I am not charging extortionate amounts or asking the earth re holidays etc.

I also requested a 2 week deposit from her which I would knock off final bill when care ends and she has queried this also - she wants me to knock it off first bill. The more I think about it the less I want her business.

I have contacted a few childminder friends this aft too (all local) and they all think she is chancing it. They all charge more than I do anyway as they have more experience and none of them offer sibling disounts either. She may struggle to find someone willing to match her current CM so she maybe best to stay where she is anyway.

She is looking for a new CM more local to her and one that can guarentee spaces for both children as the current one cant - her hubby has had to change his working days to cover where the CM cant.

I am sure I will find others willing to accept my fees & T&Cs.

But will come back and let you know how this one pans out.

Thank you all again xx

**caz3007** · 24-07-2012, 06:32 AM

Good luck Helen, Just tell here this is how it is, she either likes it or looks elsewhere, and actually I would suggest she looks elsewhere as sure she will continue to bug you about money all the time

**miffy** · 24-07-2012, 06:49 AM

I don't offer sibling discounts at all.

TBH this parent already sounds a pain and you haven't even started looking after her children. If she is already quibbling your terms and conditions then she will continue to do so. Unless work is desperately short in your area I would give this one a wide berth!

Miffy xx

**Jods** · 24-07-2012, 07:34 AM

I charge 4.50 phr and 3.50 for sibling - I also pro-rata the money over 48 weeks, as I take 4 weeks leave a year x

**bunyip** · 24-07-2012, 08:25 AM

What is it with sibling discounts?

I've only given it once, to help out the mum of a pre-schooler who needed a little support before/after school for a short period during an emergency.

Why not a "sibling surcharge?" IME, they fight more, and use up more time and resources (and that's just my own family.)