Sorry if this is been posted already - a genderless baby

[venus89]

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1389593/Kathy-Witterick-David-Stocker-raising-genderless-baby.html

I couldn't find this on a scan through so hope I'm not reposting this. What do you think?

I think Storm is a girl. I love the idea that you could let a child be completely comfortable with who they are in that way but I do wonder if they're going to end up doing more harm than good. I think those children may well be confident but I also think they'll end up being the weird ones nobody else ever quite gets....

[flowerpots]

i think storm looked like a little boy? :laughing:

[alwaysright]

sorry but i think thats just weird.....i just dont see any advantage to what they are doing, why have they told everyone the other two are boys but they are having this one genderless...and the poor boy with the long plaits looks just like a girl! takes all sorts i suppose but not for me

[rickysmiths]

How silly, poor child when they go to nursery and school. I think its cruel.:panic:

[miffy]

the poor boy with the long plaits looks just like a girl!

Did to me too!

Miffy xx

[It's a small world]

Im confused about this. Ok so everyone has a right to live the way they want etc etc and they think they are giving that child the choice. But surely they are just going to confuse that child , shouldnt they be guiding it whilst it grows up into man or woman.?? ok so men do have long hair but this older child looks like the parents are wanting a girl hence no input that maybe shorter hair not in plaits is better for a boy. They say people can be cruel they are just setting their children up for bullies at school. Surely they can decide when they are old enough. This has confused me and that boy defo looks like a girl. Theres nothing to say boys cant like pink or play with dolls. Blimey my two play with the kitchen and prams alot but they also like cars etc they choose what they like and dislike but I dont go to the extreme of not discosing their gender. Everyone knows they enjoy playing with these things and they dont get ridculed because of thier gender. Weird parents me thinks ??:rolleyes:

[Trouble]

my mums friend son has 2 kids which are both sexes who will decide themselves when they are ready to:thumbsup:

[nannymcflea]

WHY? Is it cool to rebel against genetics? My 'child' would have made the decision not to go to school too, doesn't make it right, they are children and need guidance in many things!

As for the long hair, wearing pink etc, no problem BUT these parents are also doing things for themselves and not for the future of their children living in todays society.

Just my opinion and I'm tired and grumpy.

[christine e]

Crazy attention seekers is my opinion of this family and an insult to parents who are not sure of their child's gender

Cx

[mushpea]

I think its a very sad situation,, obvoiusly the parents seek attention and this is the way they have gotten it,, its also gonna be awful for the little one as they grow up not only trying to work out who they are but to put up with the inevitable bullying that will come.

[onceinabluemoon]

Ok, so I've thought long and hard about this before I answered and while it's not something I would have done myself I can sort of see 'the point' behind it...

Firstly, they are not keeping the gender of the child from the child themselves or from its siblings, all they are doing is keeping it from the world at general.

Secondly, what does it matter if the oldest boy has long hair, wants to wear plaits or has a pink dress. The child is expressing who he is not who people think he should be. He will not be ridiculed at school because his parents have allowed him to be home schooled - why should he not have the right to choose this for himself if his parents have given him this option?

Think how much people are going to have to get to know Storm as a person because they cannot generalise. For example at Christmas, unable to go down the stereotypical route of 'lets buy her a baby annabelle' are actually going to have to think about what Storm likes and go from there, they are going to have to learn about the child which surely means they will have a better relationship with them?

Think about how we, as childminders, are supposed to find out about the child and plan everything around their own interests. If this was a boy who liked wearing pink dresses you would plan around that wouldn't you and think nothing of it, in fact you would embrace it because the child is being himself.

The parents have said they are only going to do it as long as the older children and Storm are comfortable with it. I can see the logic behind it and dont think if it as a science experiment just a parent allowing the child to be themselves and saying "Come and learn about my child for who they are, not presume you know them because they are a particular gender" I'll bet the grandparents will know Storm far better than they know their other grandchildren because they will know Storm for Storm rather than assume Storm is a certain way because Storm is a certain gender...

[kindredspirits]

What I really disagree with is that they are setting their children up for social exclusion - yes they home school, but even home schooled children need to be able to socialise without the stigma of children not wanting to play with them because they are not the 'norm'.

I don't think that grandparents would be pre-disposed to buying a girl a doll or vice versa as they (the parents) have already expressed through the older children that they are able to enjoy toys of either gender orientation.
I also feel its not really the place of external family members/friends to encourage gender neutralisation - my son loves pink, he plays with barbies he has a pink bike with glittery tassles - he also loves cars and trucks etc - it was mine and his Dad's influence that allowed him to accept that he could play with any type of toy despite his sex which I believe it making him a lovely, well-rounded child. This child is being deprived of a gender to the outside world - their older children are boys who like girly stuff - this child is neither and is therefore likely to grow up confused imo

[little chickee]

I have no issue with boys liking pink or playing with "girls" toys or vice versa and i let my 3 boys choose they own way.

My eldest at 14 has always kept his hair short, worn boys clothes and played with boys toys.

Youngest 2 are 11 and 8 and 11yo dabbled with nail varnish and has had long hair since he was 9 but is now going shorter.

8yo has always loved pink, baby annabels, nail varnish etc etc. He has long hair and shows no sign of changing.

So i am all for kids finding their own way. BUT to refuse to say wheter a child is a boy or a girl is just plain daft. I understand it in a way as they have clearly had issues from other peoples attitudes to their 2 boys but they are dealing with it.

They should just carry on dealing with it with this lo.

I wonder if the baby is a boy and they wanted a girl so want to be free to dress him as a girl without predjudice.

[~Chelle~]

sorry but i think thats just weird.....i just dont see any advantage to what they are doing, why have they told everyone the other two are boys but they are having this one genderless...and the poor boy with the long plaits looks just like a girl! takes all sorts i suppose but not for me

Same here, thought it was a little girl with plaits.

I really think that they want a girl and maybe this child is another boy, it did look like a boy.

What a confusing way to bring up a child!!!

[onceinabluemoon]

I wonder if the baby is a boy and they wanted a girl so want to be free to dress him/her as a girl without predjudice.

I cant help wondering if this is what people think of me :blush:

I'd never thought about it much until I read this thread. My 15 year old has had very long hair since he was very young, he's even had it plaited!!! :eek: he wears nail varnish on occasions too (a little bit of an emo).

I have six sons not two, so I guess there's even more reason to suspect I only let him to it because I want a girl, lol :laughing: :laughing: :laughing:

[venus89]

I cant help wondering if this is what people think of me :blush:

I'd never thought about it much until I read this thread. My 15 year old has had very long hair since he was very young, he's even had it plaited!!! :eek: he wears nail varnish on occasions too (a little bit of an emo).

I have six sons not two, so I guess there's even more reason to suspect I only let him to it because I want a girl, lol :laughing: :laughing: :laughing:

But that's fine - you're letting them make the choice. Which I guess is what these parents are trying to do, let their child make a choice. But surely at the end of the day nature has already chosen what gender Storm is. And true, we do respond to babies and children in different ways depending on their gender but these days I don't think any of us would bat an eyelid at a boy in a dress or a girl with really short hair. But they're bringing unwanted (or maybe not) attention to the child and its siblings (and also, how awkward calling Storm 'it' :( ) I think it's a lovely idea in principle but not in the world we live in, not with how cruel other children can be. They need to protect their child from risk of ridicule.

Trouble - I'd love to hear more about your mum's friends son. How are they managing it? How old is the child?

[Alibali]

Being in the position of delivering a baby and not being able to identify the gender i find this really quite offensive. The parents of this baby were devastated to not know the gender and having to wait for genetics, i too feel it is an insult to them. Also, I know this is America, but is there not something in the Eurppean childrens rights about knowing their gender etc? I know it says the child will know, but to tell a child not to share this, no I'm sorry, they have been gifted with a child of a specific gender and should rejoice in that!

[blue bear]

Most concerning to me is the fact they have taught their older two to keep secrets.

I mind a little boy who wants to be a woman when he grows up, loves dressing up in dresses, make up, hand bags etc. His mum is very relaxed let's him investigate and play as he likes, to he honest girl type dress up stuff is more fun and attractive to children on the whole and no wonder boys want to wear them.