would you correct this???

[kindredspirits]

:blush: I would like to start by saying that I have never used the term 'black' to refer to a person - even if just stating facts.
My son said very loudly to my little south african mindee the other day 'what are you doing in the pushchair you little black baby' !?! I don't know where he got it from but it wasn't from home (he is only just 3).
Now I know he is just making an observation - this baby is a different skin colour to all other children he has ever come into contact with but would you just ignore the observation or tell him we don't call people 'black' (when in actual fact we do in society, even on the news i have heard them use that term.)
I don't actually mind him making an observation like that and it obviouly wasn't meant in a bad way so not sure how to deal with it, if at all.

[Pipsqueak]

I don;t think i would make too much of an issue out of it, he is just 3 and he is stating the obvious - perhaps slightly grammatically/polictically wrong in the way us adults think.
I would perhaps just said ' oh xx is in the buggy because he is a baby and can't walk as far as you yet'

Kids can really come out with things that are really close to the mark - very unintentionally can't they.

The acceptable way to describe someone who is black - is black. (so I learnt on a recent diversity and inclusion training). Its not person of colour, coloured etc - that is denying a black person their status.

[aly]

I don't know what I'd say to that but calling them black is good as that is what they are. They don't like being Called coloured etc because they are not pink etc but black.

[nannymcflea]

I would ask parents how they would like to be refered to, as your ds has noticed that X's skin is different to his and you would like to know if they call themselves "african, asian,black,mixed race, dual herritage etc etc.

I'm sure you can put it diplomatically and it will also help ds to use the correct terminology.

Does that make any sense?

[kindredspirits]

yes thank you i will do that. I am quite relieved at the response you've given me as poor old george is having a tough time with words at the minute - dh has been swearing rather a lot so george has taken to calling everything his f**king xyz :panic: :panic: trying to explain to him that he can't use a word that daddy uses (or rather used) regularly is not working so we've had to change it to 'blinking' so that he can at least stop saying the word. :rolleyes:

[venus89]

yes thank you i will do that. I am quite relieved at the response you've given me as poor old george is having a tough time with words at the minute - dh has been swearing rather a lot so george has taken to calling everything his f**king xyz :panic: :panic: trying to explain to him that he can't use a word that daddy uses (or rather used) regularly is not working so we've had to change it to 'blinking' so that he can at least stop saying the word. :rolleyes:

so then if you tell him not to use 'black' then he'll associate that with swear words, when it's not in the same category at all..... I'd ignore it. He wasn't being derogatory or rude and he's only 3.

[tinkerbelle]

i mind a child of mixed race and his older siblings i asked them how they refered to their skin colouring and was told by each of them they are brown (mixed race ) so with mums agreement when doing activities we called their skin tone brown
id ask mum/dad what they prefere x

[onceinabluemoon]

I think it's more the way in which something is said rather than the words themselves sometimes, so if something is not said with malice or intent to hurt then I ignore it if possible (obviously not if another person is upset by the comment).

[haribo]

when my youngest was in a playgroup . she kept talking about a girl called Durga and said she liked her because she had purple skin .. i didnt really know what to say so just said no her skin is lovely brown . i got lots of books about different people and places etc and talked about different coloured skin until it was common place to her and she didnt comment . i had a horrendous experience when my eldest was still only one she was very advanced and one day we saw a very black man and she stared hard and said whys that man dirty :blush: :blush: . i was so mortified luckily he realised and said dont worry shes only a babe . he was very kind but it made me want to educate her and quickly.

[karen m]

my grandson is really into Ghostbusters and when talking about them says and the black man is doing this or that his mum was mortified but i told her the man is black so what is the problem,she was worried people would think that was how she spoke

[TheBTeam]

I would not make too much of an issue.

I cared for a black child and checked with mum one day, because the child and i and some others had been having a discussion about colour and I said that he was black etc, well he was laughing and said but I am brown. His mum thinks it is mad that the correct term is black when in fact they are brown and she said her son finds it very confusing! And she didnt care what I called him cos we are what we are, at the end of the day you are not white you are pink arent you she said to me!

I really think a true description of colour does not make it racism, it is the extra words that some people add that are racist, not saying you are a brown or black person.

[EllaBella]

When I was born, I was black.
When I grew up, I was black.
When I get hot, I am black.
When I get cold, I am black.
When I am sick, I am black.
When I die, I am black.

When you were born, You were pink.
When you grew up, You were white.
When you get hot, You go red.
When you get cold, You go blue.
When you are sick, You go purple.
When you die, You go green.

AND YET YOU HAVE THE CHEEK TO CALL ME COLOURED!!!


a little poem that is on the bathroom door of one of my foster carer friends :thumbsup:

[Zoomie]

In South Africa, an African person is referred to as black, a European person as white, and a mixture is a coloured.

[TheBTeam]

When I was born, I was black.
When I grew up, I was black.
When I get hot, I am black.
When I get cold, I am black.
When I am sick, I am black.
When I die, I am black.

When you were born, You were pink.
When you grew up, You were white.
When you get hot, You go red.
When you get cold, You go blue.
When you are sick, You go purple.
When you die, You go green.

AND YET YOU HAVE THE CHEEK TO CALL ME COLOURED!!!


a little poem that is on the bathroom door of one of my foster carer friends :thumbsup:

I like this! Although much to my amusement when I started caring for black children I could actually tell when they had caught the sun, something i had never thought you would notice, one mum was most impressed that i noticed!!!:laughing:

[jo f]

I thought black was right ( from training ages ago), and mixed race too

[rachelle]

My step mum is black, 2 of my sisters are mixed race - those are their terms :) Rest of my sibliings are pre step marriage and white.

My neice asked a while back why she was different (aged 7), when probed she said she was different because she wasn't black or white - she is actually white but with gorgeous olive skin tones, she wont have it that she's white though, sees herself as brown..

I think he was just observing - could have said small baby, screaming baby, grubby baby etc - just went with an adjective which told you which baby. I would have said something like "isn't his skin a lovely colour, yours is too, which is your favourite part of you? - accept and move the conversation on :)

[auntym]

My nephew (sisters son) his dad is jamaican origin, black...my nephews now 8, but growing up he use to say, "aunt mel im brownbread today" lol then id ask him what colour he was the next day hed say "im white bread like you and my mummy"..sometimes hed even say aunt mel ur llellow (yellow) lol??

He is brown, and he calls himself brown, he calls me peach, but when i get a tan he says im trying to be like him ...... makes me smile to even think about the things he says x

[Annie_T]

i wouldnt worry tbh i dont think its worng. but obv everyone is different and has own opinions

i have black friends and they prefer to be called black than coloured (i have asked a few) or different skin colour, coz they are black and not any other colour (one of my mates words not mine) I even have a 'half cast' mate whom dont mind being called 'half cast' or 'black' (going off topic wants to know what colour his kids would be if was to have any with a white girl)

everyone is different and will have own opinions on it hun but to me i wouldnt worry x

[kindredspirits]

thanks for all your replies its really put my mind at rest - particularly being that we were in the middle of tescos and people obviously know i'm a childminder - i didnt want them thinking that he had got something 'bad' off me.

[Helen Dempster]

I always call African/Jamaican etc people 'black', and the reason for this is, when I was at school (many moons ago now), we actually took part in a survey asking if they prefer being called 'black' or 'coloured' and yep, you've guessed it, they ALL said 'black' and would rather be called that. I have a black child in my setting, and a new boy started a couple of weeks back, and promptly told him he looks like chocolate!! :eek: He's only 4 and again, was stating a fact in his mind - chocolate's the same colour after all. I think as someone else said, they are just stating facts and aren't being mean/malicious...they are very young and so innocent, I think sometimes it's us adults who create a problem that isn't there.

[Trouble]

my dd used to say people had chocolate all over there faces:laughing: :laughing: :laughing: