Struggling to get ds to eat !!!!

[It's a small world]

My ds (2.5) used to be such a good eater then just before Xmas he was pretty poorly with a virus , no appetite etc lost quite alot of weight even though he was already tiny. Someone suggested whillst he was ill to give him what he wanted just to ensure that he ate and tried to put weight on. All he would eat was biscuits and dry cheerios (I didnt feel this was right but did it just so I knew he would eat he was so thin when changing nappies his legs looked like they would snap with no fat on them..Doctors werent concerned either)

Anyway he's better now but Im struggling to get him to eat. Someones suggested he's a grazer as wants snacks all the time (doesnt always eat them though) Im trying to fit his meals in with after schoolers (only provide snacks) and because of the time their here if I left it till they went home he wouldnt eat at all. If I try to give him dinner whilst they have their snacks but then he wants snacks like them then wont eat his dinner later. I provide healthy hot/cold meals at lunch for mindees but he wont eat that. Tried ervything but he just spits it out. Then wants pudding. I feel if I refuse him pudding he will realise that he needs to eat his meals. I know people say he'll eat when hes hungry but any ideas how I can get him to eat proper healthy meals like he did before he was poorly???

Im at the end of my tether my other ds is such a good eater will try and eat everything except melon and I mean everything!!!

Sorry if this is long!!!!

[Tatia]

I wish you lived near cos you could do the MEND 2-4 course that I am teaching at the centre. We use techniques to encourage children to try new and different foods. We have a little character called Sammy Ray and the kids have really responded to offering him bites of their new foods. They've all made placemats with his picture and parents use it at home. Even my own daughter, who is a very fussy eater, has taken to it. If (when) Sammy Ray tires a new food, he gets a sticker and the kids love being the one to give it to him. There's also a whole method we go through each week to get the children to try new things.

Gosh, this is a 10 week course so hard to give a quick overview...I'm happy to try and answer any questions you may have.

My first recomendation is have you been to his GP or health visitor? You'll want to keep in touch with them over this and make them aware.

[caz3007]

I have a mindie of a similar age and his mum and me are despairing about him not eating. All he asks for is biscuits and cake which he isnt getting at the monent. All we both can get him to eat is cheese and yoghurt and its not from lack of trying.

[Tatia]

Research says that a child needs to be exposed to a new food at least 15-18 times before they will say they like it and eat it regularly. Exposure doesn't necassarily mean eating it but just looking at it, touching it, smelling it, that all counts as exposure.

In this case, I'd classify foods he used to eat but won't try now as 'new' foods.

At 2 1/2, he only has a little tummy so should be offered foods little and often. It may seem like grazing to you but 3 large meals and 2 small snacks isn't necassarily the best way to feed a child that age. Sometimes portion size alone is the biggest obstacle. We tend to give children too much food and they feel overwhelmed and won't even try.

Also, have a look at the drinks he is having. Is he filling upon milk and squash?

Just re-read your OP and even though I don't agree with using or withholding food as a punishment/reward, I think I would give the puddings a miss. Or offer fruit and yogurt as 'pudding' instead, if you must.

I'm not criticising you at all. Believe me, when I was doing the MEND training, I sat there feeling like a terrible mother because I make so many mistakes! If you want to PM me with where you live, I could attemopt to contact MEND Central to see if there are any courses near you. Or you can go here: http://www.mendprogramme.org/mendservices/minimend/findprogramme to see if there's a program near you.

[It's a small world]

Research says that a child needs to be exposed to a new food at least 15-18 times before they will say they like it and eat it regularly. Exposure doesn't necassarily mean eating it but just looking at it, touching it, smelling it, that all counts as exposure.

In this case, I'd classify foods he used to eat but won't try now as 'new' foods.

At 2 1/2, he only has a little tummy so should be offered foods little and often. It may seem like grazing to you but 3 large meals and 2 small snacks isn't necassarily the best way to feed a child that age. Sometimes portion size alone is the biggest obstacle. We tend to give children too much food and they feel overwhelmed and won't even try.

Also, have a look at the drinks he is having. Is he filling upon milk and squash?

Just re-read your OP and even though I don't agree with using or withholding food as a punishment/reward, I think I would give the puddings a miss. Or offer fruit and yogurt as 'pudding' instead, if you must.

I'm not criticising you at all. Believe me, when I was doing the MEND training, I sat there feeling like a terrible mother because I make so many mistakes! If you want to PM me with where you live, I could attemopt to contact MEND Central to see if there are any courses near you. Or you can go here: http://www.mendprogramme.org/mendservices/minimend/findprogramme to see if there's a program near you.


Thanks for your views I know youre not critising honestly. I dont withhold pudding as a punishment just thought if he realised that he ate his lunch/dinner he would have his pudding. I do try and give him fruit if he doesnt eat meals(instead of a treat !) I also understand about large/overfacing meals so I tend to give small portions as like you say he has a small tummy (even more so when hes not eaten much in a while) I agree I think its a case of re introducing foods. Got him to eat some pasta (1 teaspoon-- an acheivement) . Will try and re introduce and may try and get a little puppet and sticker scheme like you suggest. If this doesnt work I will Pm you and discuss to see if I could get on a course if thats ok.. Thank you so much for your help. I kinda had a few ideas etc and you have confirmed what I was thinking and given me other suggestion...watch your box incase I need help.
Thanks again x

[Tatia]

I have gotten your PM but have been at work. I'll repsond more fully tonight. :)

[katickles]

Research says that a child needs to be exposed to a new food at least 15-18 times before they will say they like it and eat it regularly. Exposure doesn't necassarily mean eating it but just looking at it, touching it, smelling it, that all counts as exposure.

In this case, I'd classify foods he used to eat but won't try now as 'new' foods.

At 2 1/2, he only has a little tummy so should be offered foods little and often. It may seem like grazing to you but 3 large meals and 2 small snacks isn't necassarily the best way to feed a child that age. Sometimes portion size alone is the biggest obstacle. We tend to give children too much food and they feel overwhelmed and won't even try.

Also, have a look at the drinks he is having. Is he filling upon milk and squash?

Just re-read your OP and even though I don't agree with using or withholding food as a punishment/reward, I think I would give the puddings a miss. Or offer fruit and yogurt as 'pudding' instead, if you must.

I'm not criticising you at all. Believe me, when I was doing the MEND training, I sat there feeling like a terrible mother because I make so many mistakes! If you want to PM me with where you live, I could attemopt to contact MEND Central to see if there are any courses near you. Or you can go here: http://www.mendprogramme.org/mendservices/minimend/findprogramme to see if there's a program near you.

Thanks for the info - I have just been reading through with interest - sounds great!


Kerrie Louise - My 1st dd can be very fussy - it again stemmed from when she was younger & poorly. Now everytime she's poorly I dread the eating afterwards :(

BUT I have to say at the moment she's eating much much better again - its taken a while as she is just about to turn 3 & we have been having this now for about 1 1/2yrs!!

I guess alot will come in time, I agree little amounts & often & lots of encouragement to try new things & praise when he does. x

[It's a small world]

:clapping: he ate a banana yesterday and today ( be asked for it too):clapping today I have given small selection of snacks tomorrow going to try small portion of potato and beans and mash together to give a veg option seehow it goes. Going to take a step at a time but def been an improvement last couple of days ( must have known I was talking about him lol) going o be along process but with the advice I've had on here feel more confident in dealing with the situation thanks x