PitterPatter
17-03-2014, 08:51 PM
I look after a 17 month old girl 3 days a week, only child, older parents, prem (touch and go at birth) so very protective parents, grandparents look after her other two days (very doting) and parents at weekend. She started in September at 10 m, quickly became extremely clingy and screamed (and I mean scream) if I was not holding her until January, at which point she settled but remains very highly demanding. She does not know how to play independently at all and constantly says my name, attaches to me if she does not have my undivided attention. I also have my own son and another boy, who are both 2.5 yrs. Other boy is also an only child and very demanding as well (less so than the girl). My own son plays the jealousy card from time to time but has now become good friends with the 2.5 yr boy so that is less of an issue now.
If I try to play with boys (eg jigsaws, bingo), girl attaches herself to me and cries, if I try to play with girl (eg story), boys stop what doing and come over and she then protests. On top of this, I feel like I say "no" too much to boy. "Help me (jigsaw)" - no, making lunch. Wants tap on permanently in garden, no. Finds older son's swords and wants to fight with them, no. Wants daughter's DS and climbs on chair to retrieve it from mantle piece - no. Climbing on suite - no. I try to emphasise positive and explain why not but it gets to me and must get to him. Grandad (has him one day) very permissive and parents more so than me, but they just have him, not three toddlers + three more after school.
I am not even sure why I am writing this post. Feeling guilty I guess. Not giving any of them what they need. Not sure how to solve it. Other days have different two year old and eight month old brother plus my son and totally different story. Both mindees socialised from birth and capable of independent play - able to split time between them all far more easily. (Thank goodness!)
If I try to play with boys (eg jigsaws, bingo), girl attaches herself to me and cries, if I try to play with girl (eg story), boys stop what doing and come over and she then protests. On top of this, I feel like I say "no" too much to boy. "Help me (jigsaw)" - no, making lunch. Wants tap on permanently in garden, no. Finds older son's swords and wants to fight with them, no. Wants daughter's DS and climbs on chair to retrieve it from mantle piece - no. Climbing on suite - no. I try to emphasise positive and explain why not but it gets to me and must get to him. Grandad (has him one day) very permissive and parents more so than me, but they just have him, not three toddlers + three more after school.
I am not even sure why I am writing this post. Feeling guilty I guess. Not giving any of them what they need. Not sure how to solve it. Other days have different two year old and eight month old brother plus my son and totally different story. Both mindees socialised from birth and capable of independent play - able to split time between them all far more easily. (Thank goodness!)