DO NOT SHOUT AT ME

[ajs]

i know what most of you are going to say BUT please don't shout i just want your opinions

i started with e in sept working wed thurs and fri 29 hours a week no problem
grandma had her mon and tues

in april mum asked me if i would have e full time for june as grandma was away for much of it no problem so far

in June mum was promoted at work and asked me if i would start full time with e
i said yes and then mum asked if we could work out a discount as i would be working 49 hours with her @ £3.75 an hour and was there a full time discount on offer
well this month i offered her 5% which took her bill down to £800 this month.
i am happy with that really as i do agree a full time place is a lot of money but it's also a lot of hard work for me too ( i think someone posted yesterday about if we were generous to our parents)

anyway i woke up this morning to an email asking me if e goes full time permannetly will i offer her 2 floating days (that she amy or may not use as e can go to grandmas) a month which if she doesn't use will be £75 less money for me
i replied that i can do one but not both so if i offer the floating days i cannot offer the discount too.

what do you think, am i being petty, would you offer the discount of about 5% and give her the option of two unpaid days off a month bearing in mind we are going into a recession, and i would still be earning about £700 - £750 from one child a month or should i just offer one not the other or would you offer no discount or floating days and risk losing the child to nursery

[barbarella68]

Must admit I haven't heard of floater days,I wouldn't do this:)

[Monkey1]

I think shes pushing her luck babe x

[ajs]

i don't know if there is a proper name for what she wants but she called them floater days
what she means is that i have e full time but if grandma wants to have her 2 days a month then i wouldn't be paid for them, it's effectively a discount but not every month

i know i should say no really but am i biting off my nose if i lose her which i may well do as mum has said a number of times that the nurseries are cheaper
although how she knows i've no idea as she hasn't even put e's name down for proper nursery yet and she starts in a year

[donnagwynne]

Wow mandy,

i would love to be earning that much from one child!!!!!

does the mum have to find all of the money for e's childcare or do you think that she gets help from working families tax thingybob????

do you like caring for e? could you replace her easily if she left you?

it sounds like e's mum may be struggling and grandma still wants to be involved. I would be tempted to bite the bullet and be as flexible as possible, it may not be forever and you may get your days back in the end any
way.

love Donna:D

[ajs]

Wow mandy,

i would love to be earning that much from one child!!!!!

does the mum have to find all of the money for e's childcare or do you think that she gets help from working families tax thingybob???? no she finds it herself they are not eligible
do you like caring for e? could you replace her easily if she left you? yes i do love her but she's hard work and no i wouldn't easily replace her, i have had a few calls but not for those hours

it sounds like e's mum may be struggling and grandma still wants to be involved. I would be tempted to bite the bullet and be as flexible as possible, it may not be forever and you may get your days back in the end any
way.
love Donna:D

i agree and that's why i am asking what others would do it's a lot of money to lose if she takes e away from me

[sarah707]

I think she's pushing it as well ...

Don't do anything that will leave you feeling resentful in a few months time!

[wendywu]

If you do undertake this, and i would not consider it. Do it set days a month or you will not know where you are. She could mess you about at the last moment. Or say she has to give you at least 24 hours notice.

:panic:

[mrsb]

Personally I would agree to 2 unpaid days per month, if nothing else it would give me time for housework etc:laughing:

seriously though, I'd be happy to have 2 days unpaid per month if I was earning that amount each month :)

[marian]

Hi

Would the 'cheaper' nurseries offer 'floater days'?
I bet they wouldn't.

Marian

[Twinkles]

I think she's pushing her luck. She's lucky that you were kind enough to give her a discount in the first place. No I'd say either discount or two floating days , she can't have it all her way.

[Pudding Girl]

thing is these floating days would have to surely be booked solely for her use anyway as otherwise you can't fill them? no I would say shehas discount and you fit her into these floating days if you can.

[Kelly]

Given the hours you will be clocking up each month, I would agree to the 2 days, for my own sanity as much as anything else. It would be quite nice to have a couple of days off each month. I would say that I could not offer the discount + 2 floater days. I would offer discount + 1 floater day, 2 floater days or discount.

Good luck

Kelly

[angeldelight]

She is pushing her luck and you know it Mandy

Its up to you what YOU want to do at the end of the day

Good luck whatever you decide

Angel xx

[foxy lady]

she is paying quite alot for one child its good money!!!
BUT you have to do what you think is right,
good luck with whatever you decide

[venus89]

What about half price for the floater day if she takes them?

[charleyfarley]

When I took O on full time I took a pay drop as I'd had no interest at all and was down to 1 part timer. I felt at the time it was either drop my fees or lose lo.

It paid off for me as she signed there and then and then put my money up in April to what it should have been anyway.

I know it's not the same situation but you need to do what's right for you.

She is already getting a discount so is pushing her luck asking for the 2 days as well.

I would let her have one or the other but then it's not my decision to make.

Good luck with deciding what to do.

Carol xx

[avril]

What about half price for the floater day if she takes them?

That's a good compromise but don't offer the 5% discount as well :panic: :panic:
She knew how much before agreeing to you having the child in the first place but yes I agree with above half fee but fix the days off so you know were you are working!

Hope it all works out for you.

[jmoff]

Well it is a lot of money, but maybe she could use childcare vouchers?

Not sure, mandy, she is pushing her luck...i dont think i would offer both floater days and discount!

good luck!
Jx

[wendywu]

It is only the average wage per full time child in my area. It is also the average amount of hours for a full timer.:)

£4.00 per hour for full time is the cheaper end of the market down here.

[Little Pumpkins]

I charge for floating days even if not used, after all its taking space up

[MissTinkerbell]

I agree with others - she's pushing her luck expecting both. I'd offer EITHER the 2 floating days (and ask for at least a week's notice) or the 5% discount.

Or you could offer the 2 days and the discount provided she pays a 1/2 fee for those 2 days - after all your services are available and SHE is chosing not to use them.

I've told my parents that if my services are available and they don't use them (a day off or such like) then I will still charge full price. They've all been perfectly happy with this.

[breezy]

It's your business so you must decide, personally I'd say no to the floater days if she's already got a discount. :thumbsup:

[ajs]

she does already know that she should pay for thedays and that's the point she wants to be able to have them for nothingi don't know if she thinks i will discount the days as well as give her two days off but i just thought i'd see what you would say
(as if i didn't already know to be honest)

i know it's her pushing her luck but as charleyfarley says if she does decide i am too expensive i could lose it all, i am sure she knows that and is blackmailing me but i cannot afford to lose her completely
i have already told her that i will offer one but not both, she hasn't replied but i do know she's away with work until thursday night so i may have missed her.
thanks for all of the replies though. i could offer her the half price days and see what she says to that

[fishbones1]

I think I would offer her the two days (making sure they are set days) at half price, full pice if not used and maybe a smaller discount than 5%. If the days are set you may be able to fill with emergency childcare or such like.

Good luck with what you decide, hope all goes your way.

[lishylee]

hi i would probably do it but im a right softie
i have twin girls come to me 3 days a week 8am till 6.30pm im getting £7.50 an hour for them so good money but some weeks there dad works nights so is around during the day and he keeps them at home these weeks i only charge them for the 5 hours those days i wouldnt pay £75 a day to someone to have my kids when they wernt there lol

leanne

[angeldelight]

What did you decide to do Mandy ?

Angel xx

[miffy]

I've just read through this thread Mandy and I agree this mum is trying to blackmail you into doing as she wishes.

As far as I can make out she is the one who wants to change the arrangements - you were quite happy with your 3 days a week (although I'm sure the extra money would be very useful)

So what's in it for you if you do the extra two days?.............Well if this mum has her way not very much - you have already offered her a reasonable discount but she wants more (I suspect grandma still wants to see the child a couple of times a month and mum has asked for the floater days so she is not paying you when grandma has her).

Mum has recently had a promotion so presumably a pay rise to go with it yet she is trying to pare down what she pays you whilst expecting you to do extra work for her.

I think she's got a right cheek and if you offer both a discount and floater days you will (like I think it was Sarah who said it) end up resenting it later on.

You are worth the money you charge and she should respect that. Ooooh I think I need to come and sort her out!

Miffy xx

[carolinel]

i know what most of you are going to say BUT please don't shout i just want your opinions

i started with e in sept working wed thurs and fri 29 hours a week no problem
grandma had her mon and tues

in april mum asked me if i would have e full time for june as grandma was away for much of it no problem so far

in June mum was promoted at work and asked me if i would start full time with e
i said yes and then mum asked if we could work out a discount as i would be working 49 hours with her @ £3.75 an hour and was there a full time discount on offer
well this month i offered her 5% which took her bill down to £800 this month.
i am happy with that really as i do agree a full time place is a lot of money but it's also a lot of hard work for me too ( i think someone posted yesterday about if we were generous to our parents)

anyway i woke up this morning to an email asking me if e goes full time permannetly will i offer her 2 floating days (that she amy or may not use as e can go to grandmas) a month which if she doesn't use will be £75 less money for me
i replied that i can do one but not both so if i offer the floating days i cannot offer the discount too.

what do you think, am i being petty, would you offer the discount of about 5% and give her the option of two unpaid days off a month bearing in mind we are going into a recession, and i would still be earning about £700 - £750 from one child a month or should i just offer one not the other or would you offer no discount or floating days and risk losing the child to nursery


yes, we're heading towards a recession - that's going to effect all of us not just working parents! iygwim

[Heaven Scent]

Because I look after 2 children full time 50 hrs per week for not much more than you would get for your full hourly rate I cant help thinking that you are earning a fair amount for one child. I've been looking at the FIS site today and have seen that the most of the minders in cheshire give quite a considerable discount for a full time place - after all it is convenient with no chopping and changing and no school runs etc. so my thoughts on this are unless you are inundated with enquiries I would still offer her some sort of discount for the weeks she uses up the full time hours but not when she isn't and that in those weeks she needs to pay half rate for the 2 days so there won't be much in it and also explain that you can only offer this so long as you do not have an enquiry to fill those days but as soon as you do then she must either give them up completely or pay for them in full. Also say that if one of those days is a BH you need payment her to pay 3/4 because she may or may not have wanted them and that way you have split the difference and are being as fair as you possibly can be as you shop monthly in advance for most foods and freeze them as you need to be organised and don't get much time for shopping due to long working hours together with all time outside these for all paperwork and accounts especially now with NEW EYFS - extra burdon and all that.

I think its worth keeping her a bit sweet as I do feel that although more families will need both parents out at work well paid jobs will be few and far between and families we will need to be competitive enough price wise for people to be able to afford us - After school clubs around here are so inexpensive - the staff must be on an absolute pittence - same for the nurseries (- I was really rather well paid in my last Nursery job - over double the going rate at the time with lots of leave plus free nursery places for my children - I was one of the lucky ones. I know as time went by I wasn't just a nursery assistant or room supervisor type thing but when I went back at first I was just teacher of a small group of 3&4 year olds from May- End July.- then Started teaching in the prep class in Sept) - Sorry about the ramble but I think I'd rather have a bird in my hand than 2 in the bush - If you generally like parent and are fond of the child and they pay on time then I'd try to keep her sweet but not all on her terms yes show willing within your limits and she has to realise that you have limitations on numbers and cannot keep days open for her just in case she wants them its just the same as a retainer for school hols etc. It doesn't work. - Good luck with what ever you do

[ajs]

she threw another offer to me the other day
working mon to thurs which is 40 hours and said what discount would i offer her then

i know she is being very cheeky BUT and it's a big BUT i cannot afford to lose her (i am sure mum knows this too) and i think i am going to offer her a 5% discount on either full time or the 40 hour option but not the floater days i am not holding two places for no money ever.
i may say to her that i will let her have days off for half fee up to a certain number of days of course and that i have to have a week's notice of these days.

i am happy to have e for just the three days, and actually think i would prefer it if she dropped down the days but we don't know what's happening with d's job so this could be our main income soon
i will talk to her on monday as i need it sorting and let you all know m xx

[miffy]

Mandy - just make her one offer - 5% discount.

That then leaves you with something to barter with (week's notice for half-fee days) later if she doesn't bite.

Good luck

Miffy xx

[ajs]

good idea batman thanks:clapping:

[miffy]

You're welcome - hope you can sort it out

Miffy xx

[Heaven Scent]

Hope you get it sorted but I wouldn't give her 5% disc on part week offer her 2.5% on 4 days. Have you got other mindees? if so say they already pay you going rate and you cannot be disloyal - Thats how I put it to my cheekie parent who started in April. I met her half way(ish) and put it all in writing - a complete breakdown of the discount and what it meant to her in real terms and more importantly I Put the heading 'Final Adjustments to Fees for S&O'

I know what Sarah Nev is saying about resentment as I feel it a lot with my main family because they are onto a good thing 2 F/T children for £225 pw and when they do anything out of line I hate them for it because I feel they are really taking the P*** and they do - These are my family who take days off work and never have their children with them - because they are paying me to have them!!!!!!!!!!!! Expected me to go to their daughters sports day on Fri and are very disappointed that I won't be taking her to a gathering of mums and children from PG on Wednesday next @ a local soft play place- I can't do that sort of thing for all mindees - I have my own two children that I need to do it for.

The other stingy family are not that bad but took £4.00 of the bill for the kids tea when we had a family apt re holiday jabs and I got back a bit late and Dad arrived early and he took them without tea. I just cannot be bothered with the hassle I do let some things go that I souldn't sometimes but I'm going to created a new portfolio to give to all parents before Sept and state lots of things in writing that I haven't beforea and blame it on the EYFS - I'm not going to lie but will say its necessary for me to state them in writing now - working in partnership with parents - but I may phrase that differently as they may think it means that I only have to work in partnership with them and not them with me - I may have to say Parents and Childcare professionals working in partnership. I'm going to say they now need to inform me where they will be from day to day ie if working from home etc as I need to know priority emergency number for each day - time saves lives type of thing - I hate people thinking they can take me for a fool. I think its obvious if someone turns up in jeans one day when they normally wear smart casual as a big give away - or more to the point both parents turning up in jeans to collect when its usually just dad as he works closer.

Anyway I digressed again because of my resentment - over giving them a good deal and then they continue to take the ****.

[Hannahlg]

i woudnt offer no discount or floater days

if she is going to be using a full time place up she should pay for it. A nuresy wouldnt offer it

[Heaven Scent]

If you look at most nursey price scales they do offer a reduction for a full time place and full and etc.

[emmadines]

I charge for floating days even if not used, after all its taking space up

i agree!! as you wont be able to use the space

[helenlc]

I had parents who came to see me and they said that Dad worked Wednesdays but sometimes has these off. They asked what would happen fee wise if Dad took the day off and had the baby. I said that I would still charge as I was here and the place could not be filled at such short notice.

They were not happy!!

They had got in touch with a friend first who is a childminder and asked about full time care. But by time they came to see me, they obviously cut the purse strings as they wanted me to have him Mondays, Nan on Tuesdays, Dad (possibly) on Weds, Aunt on Thurs and Mum on Friday!! Can you imagine how confusing that will be for an 8 month old baby?

I would say that you are fine for child to go to Grandma as long as you have a weeks notice and that you will still be paid as you are available.

[miffy]

How did you get on with this Mandy - have you talked to mum yet?

Miffy xx

[angeldelight]

I think you have to do what is right for you and the parent here

Sometimes we have got to do what we have got to do if it means keeping a child - even if its wrong

Just dont undercut yourself too much otherwise you might really resent it long term

How did it go anyway ?

Angel xx

[Mrs.L.C]

I think I need to move lol

Do you know what the average the local nurseries charge? might be worth finding out before you decide but with amount of money from 1 child, I can see where you are coming from and its always nice to have a day or 2 off each month.

I guess I do the same as I do just termly contracts for most of my mindees as they have brother/sisters at school so parents arrange for family to have them so some holidays I can be out of pocket but the parents save abit

[ajs]

mum has just left and it's sorted
i asked her what she would prefer
me having e m-f
me having e 4 days
going back to 3 days

she said she'd prefer 4 days m - thurs and i said good so would i and i'll give you 5% discount as well.
it now means that in sept i will have no kids in the morning on fridays so can have a some time sorting the house and come jan i will have fri's off as long as i stick to not spreading the others onto a friday to ease the load.

now i know what's happening i just need to write to ofsted re the variation :eek:

[crazybones]

Glad youve got it sorted. I wish I still had my Friday morning off. :(

[lilsteff]

i work 72 and a half hours a week monday to saturday... i dont want to work on a saturday time as im getting no 'me' time.

i dont mind working monday 2 friday, but working so meny hours is making me ill and is affecting my home life with partner.

yesterday a parent assumed i was ok to take their child on a saturday and sunday starting this week! i tried to say no but she is one if these peopel who make a moutain out of a molehill and exagerates situations, i offered her a number of my backup childminder for a saturday but she said no. she makes me feel bad about everything, last year i only took 8 days holidays which were due to illness and she gave me a load of grief for it too.:censored:

[michellethegooner]

i work 72 and a half hours a week monday to saturday... i dont want to work on a saturday time as im getting no 'me' time.

i dont mind working monday 2 friday, but working so meny hours is making me ill and is affecting my home life with partner.

yesterday a parent assumed i was ok to take their child on a saturday and sunday starting this week! i tried to say no but she is one if these peopel who make a moutain out of a molehill and exagerates situations, i offered her a number of my backup childminder for a saturday but she said no. she makes me feel bad about everything, last year i only took 8 days holidays which were due to illness and she gave me a load of grief for it too.:censored:

omg u have to stand your ground, wot are parents contracted days? if they are mon-fri then I would state you no longer offer saturdays as you have family ties and keep the wkend for yourself, I used to take hardly any holidays as I thought I have my own at home anyway so wots the difference? soon burnt myself out and dreaded mondays as I had had no time to recharge, I now take 5 weeks a year whether I go away or not.
Be strong and stand your ground a tired run down, ill childminder is no good to anyone including yourself and your family :(

[Rubybubbles]

i work 72 and a half hours a week monday to saturday... i dont want to work on a saturday time as im getting no 'me' time.

i dont mind working monday 2 friday, but working so meny hours is making me ill and is affecting my home life with partner.

yesterday a parent assumed i was ok to take their child on a saturday and sunday starting this week! i tried to say no but she is one if these peopel who make a moutain out of a molehill and exagerates situations, i offered her a number of my backup childminder for a saturday but she said no. she makes me feel bad about everything, last year i only took 8 days holidays which were due to illness and she gave me a load of grief for it too.:censored:

hi and welcome to the forum, take a look around and you will see how we have all toughend up since joining here!!!

thats a lot of hours OMG!!!