Feeling really guilty

[Mrsh3103]

I am a newly registered childminder. I had my first parent visit me last week, she explained that her son is currently with another childminder but she's not happy with the care he gets.

He's with her 3 full days & 1 1/2 day a week. The I only time they leave the house is to go to a toddler group once a week. She has no other children so he gets no other child contact apart from at the group.
I went through everything I would do with her son. Told her about the learning journey & daily diaries. Explained the eyfs & how I would help him progress. She was completely shocked and said her current childminder has none of this. Every so often he will bring home a picture he has done- once a month max.
She phoned me after our meeting & said she would like to sort out contracts and for him to start with me as soon as her notice period with the current childminder had finished.

Today I went to the toddler group with my ds. The current childminder was there with the little boy. He was very clingy to her, constantly wanting hugs etc he genuinely seemed to love being around her.
I'm now feeling really bad, like I'm stealing business. I really don't want to start with a bad reputation with other childminders.
Earlier I was in such a flap over it all I nearly phoned mum to cancel the contract.
Sorry to waffle on but really don't know what to do now.

[Little_steps]

He probably clings to her as she is all he has during the week and toddler group is daunting if you don't normally see any children outside of that. I would carry on with the contract.
X

[Amandak28]

Hi, your not steeling business if the mum has approached you and wants you to take care of her son because she feels your a better childminder.

At the end of the day you provide a service just like the rest of us and your the better choice out of you and the other childminder.
So actually maybe the other minder should take note otherwise she could be harming her own business more.

Good luck and go with it! :-) you'll do a fine job caring for this little boy. Xx

[MessybutHappy]

I agree, the mum approached you, so it's not stealing! Parents change providers the whole time, whether it's for practical our quality reasons, some children will flourish in our care, some will do better with someone else who does things differently. Its a personal choice of the parent. I'd feel guilty if I didn't offer the care since the parent cleary wants it!

[mama2three]

So difficult for you as of course youd like a 31/2 day contract , what a great start!
Tread carefully - youre right about starting off on the wrong foot with the other local minders. Local minders can be the best source of both support and work , and although you've done absolutely nothing wrong it might not be perceived like that. Exactly the same scenario happened with a new minder here , there was some tension for a while if Im honest. The new minder spoke to some of us and we could see that she hadn't 'taken' the business - but the older minder was very very hurt.
Do you know any other local minders who might advise ?
I think I would have a chat with the mum - has she spoken to the other cm about what she would like her to do more of? Also remember if she hasn't communicated with her current cm she is unlikely to communicate with you either. Like any other relationship communication is vital!!

[Mrsh3103]

I know I'm not really doing anything wrong. But I can't help thinking everyone else will see it differently! I'm really worried about how I'd be treated at toddler groups etc when I turn up with the little boy.
I don't want to turn the business away but at the same time I don't want to ruin any chance I get of any future business by starting off on the wrong foot with the other childminders.