fluff1975
07-12-2012, 09:22 PM
Hi. I have a mindee who was 3 in August, so hes 40 months. He is a gorgeous boy, who takes a while to 'warm up'. By a while I mean AGES. He's my friends son and I've known him very well since he was 1, however he still won't speak to me for 10-15 mins or so after I pick him up from pre-school. He's very reluctant to 'do' anything at all. Won't join in with other children, doesn't play with the things I've put out. If I ask him what he'd like to play with he doesn't know. I've taken him to the toys/games etc for him to choose something but he just can't or won't choose. He either stands in the room near me or sits on the sofa. If he does find something to do that he likes, he really gets stuck in. He's great with numbers and turn taking, (although he'll only play a game with me, not others) and he loves Lego.
I've spoken to mum who knows what he's like and for a while now, and particularly with the new EYFS, we've been working on his personal social and emotional development.
Self help skills and 'joining in' are really big issues for him, so I've incorporated lots of choice-making, simple personal hygiene goals and generally trying to help him find his independence.
He's been at pre-school 5 mornings since September, and I have him for 2 afternoons. He's taken ages to settle (but not in an upset crying way) and the staff have frequently spoken to mum about how he doesn't join in. He can't tell me who any of the other children are, and spends the majority of his time at the drawing or playdough table. When I went to pick him up last week I was early and it was still playtime. I could have wept for him, because he was just walking around the periphery of the play area watching the other children and looking really out of place. Every other child was roaring around like a 3 year old in one way or another.
(This is getting somewhere, thanks for bearing with me!)
Pre-school are great at sharing info and as he's with them for the majority of the time, I've backed off and let them take the lead. So I was surprised and frankly a bit horrified to read that his next steps are;
"Literacy - writing 30-50mts. Ascribe meanings to marks made, that they have seen in different places.
Mathematics - numbers 30-50mts. Compares two groups of objects saying when they have the same number."
Is it me? What happened to prime areas of development? Particlarly when they really need focusing on! The next steps for him are relevent but not when there is a glaring PSE need. I want to say something to pre-school but not quite sure how to go about it in a nice way that makes me sound like I know what I'm on about, without being stroppy. I'm hoping that it's just new EYFS teething on their part.
Any ideas would be great! Thanks for sticking to the end!
I've spoken to mum who knows what he's like and for a while now, and particularly with the new EYFS, we've been working on his personal social and emotional development.
Self help skills and 'joining in' are really big issues for him, so I've incorporated lots of choice-making, simple personal hygiene goals and generally trying to help him find his independence.
He's been at pre-school 5 mornings since September, and I have him for 2 afternoons. He's taken ages to settle (but not in an upset crying way) and the staff have frequently spoken to mum about how he doesn't join in. He can't tell me who any of the other children are, and spends the majority of his time at the drawing or playdough table. When I went to pick him up last week I was early and it was still playtime. I could have wept for him, because he was just walking around the periphery of the play area watching the other children and looking really out of place. Every other child was roaring around like a 3 year old in one way or another.
(This is getting somewhere, thanks for bearing with me!)
Pre-school are great at sharing info and as he's with them for the majority of the time, I've backed off and let them take the lead. So I was surprised and frankly a bit horrified to read that his next steps are;
"Literacy - writing 30-50mts. Ascribe meanings to marks made, that they have seen in different places.
Mathematics - numbers 30-50mts. Compares two groups of objects saying when they have the same number."
Is it me? What happened to prime areas of development? Particlarly when they really need focusing on! The next steps for him are relevent but not when there is a glaring PSE need. I want to say something to pre-school but not quite sure how to go about it in a nice way that makes me sound like I know what I'm on about, without being stroppy. I'm hoping that it's just new EYFS teething on their part.
Any ideas would be great! Thanks for sticking to the end!