Advice on pencil grip

**fridaysoff** · 21-01-2010, 07:22 PM

Hi, need help please!

I have a child turining 3 in couple of weeks, all development on track, had him since baby. He is small, loves playing with dolls house, cars, home corner. When we get invovled in anything requiring fine motor delicate control he just doesn't seem to be able to have any level of force except hard eg threading a bead on a stick no prob, on a string it bends as he presses it too firmly too fast. Holding a crayon or pen always reverts to a fist grip and presses so hard that he almost shudders along his arm. Nearly all felt pens have nibs in now! When he is excited he stands on tiptoes, legs rigid and arms go out to sides a bit and hands go into fists or outstreched and tense and I think when he has to concentrate on something like threading, puzzle etc he looses some control as the energy/ tension through concentration seems to almost fizzle along his arms and legs! he gets frustrated when he can't do things quickly and will give up so he needs to be able to practise with some challenge but not for too long.

Any suggestions for activities to try please - and I've even tried painting with feathers!! They all bent!

**Minstrel** · 21-01-2010, 07:39 PM

I would be interested to the replies on this to.

My son is quite a bit older at three and half and everything is bang on track. The only thing he struggles with is firm pencil grip. He colours in fine because the movements are big and fast but writing letters he struggles and drops the pencil often.

I know he knows how to write the letters as he can use other means to show me but he is getting frustrated!

**fridaysoff** · 21-01-2010, 07:42 PM

Hi Minstrel

sorry - feel tired - is your son's difficulty that he can't hold the pencil with enough control and grip? Cos I could give you some suggestions on that - mine is the other way round - too much tension!.... (Oh sorry that's me!! ha ha

)

**Minstrel** · 21-01-2010, 07:54 PM

Ha yes it is! I feel like i'm about to answer my own question because I think he finds them too thin- so i suppose i should buy some chunky pencils? doh!

Any other tips wouls be great though!

Have to say i've never come across a child with so much pressure they bend things though- wow!

**beccas** · 21-01-2010, 07:56 PM

have you tried those grips you fit on pencils to help a childly hold it correct

**fridaysoff** · 21-01-2010, 08:07 PM

No! why haven't I??! but I will.

I think because its not just with pencils he just wants to inscribe into the table below - leave me a lasting memory! It's with anything needing a gentle touch. I had his brother before and the pre-schl teacher had mum in to schl to have a word because she had never seen anything like it (she says, she was there a few months) And I felt that she thought it was my fault for not doing the right thing with him when he was little with me. (Childminder paranoia - but I can't spell it!) Apart from wanting to give the child the best start to school I also don't want any criticism heading my way.

**fridaysoff** · 21-01-2010, 08:12 PM

Minstrel - Have you tried the wide triangular pencils you can get? Lidl had some a few weeks back. If you think he needs to develop greater strength in his hands then you could try clay modelling and playdough stuff, things that involve squeazing like squirty botttles in the bath, making bread rolls, or digging in soil or damp sand

good luck x

**Minstrel** · 21-01-2010, 08:28 PM

Originally Posted by fridaysoff

Minstrel - Have you tried the wide triangular pencils you can get? Lidl had some a few weeks back. If you think he needs to develop greater strength in his hands then you could try clay modelling and playdough stuff, things that involve squeazing like squirty botttles in the bath, making bread rolls, or digging in soil or damp sand

good luck x

Fab ideas thank you very much. Ive got parent meeting next week with his nursery so will see what they think.

**madasahatter** · 21-01-2010, 08:35 PM

I really wouldn't worry too much. 3 is still very young and many (most) children do not have the fine control necessary for anything other than scribbling. Go for chunky pencils/crayons etc that won't get destroyed as easily and just let them have a go at mark making with no pressure or defined outcome. Finger painting or a sand tray can be good for getting children to make bold shapes, circles, lines, waves, zigzags etc. These will help develop the movements associated with pre writing skills too.

**Minstrel** · 21-01-2010, 08:47 PM

Your probably right - worrying over nothing - just what us mums (and cm's) do best at, eh?

**Heaven Scent** · 21-01-2010, 08:48 PM

Go to you your local toy library or buy some puzzles etc with large knobs on and teach him to hold these, then teach him to pick up things using his pincer grip starting with largish reasonably heavy objects using all of his fingers then gradually moving down to smaller and smaller objects. - I'm not explaining this very well if you are confused PM me. Basically what you are trying to do is to develop and strengthen the muscles in his hand then in his fingers - I wouldn't dream of giving a child of this age felt tip pen or ball point pens - fat chunky pavement chalk is good as it provides friction and therefore control - mark making is what it all about at this stage and its really quite normal for a child to hold a writing implement especially a thin light one using a grasp hold.

We are not supposed to be encouraging children at this age to write so I would focus on other things to help develop the muscles in his hand and prepare him for threading and then writing etc. Another thing you could do is when using wooden knobbed puzzles get the child to feel around the shape and cut out when removing and before replacing it using the index finger of his dominant hand.

Good luck and relax he's not ready because he is not supposed to be ready.

jumpinjen · 21-01-2010, 10:46 PM

Originally Posted by Heaven Scent

Another thing you could do is when using wooden knobbed puzzles get the child to feel around the shape and cut out when removing and before replacing it using the index finger of his dominant hand.

Good luck and relax he's not ready because he is not supposed to be ready.

Do you have an interest in Montessori?

jenni

**Heaven Scent** · 21-01-2010, 10:51 PM

i'm Montessori trained and have worked in the world of Montessori since 1987!!!

How did you guess???

jumpinjen · 21-01-2010, 10:54 PM

It just sounded right to me.... I am halfway through my early years diploma with MCi at the moment, starting TP at the end of Feb!!!

Jenni

**Heaven Scent** · 22-01-2010, 12:17 AM

Originally Posted by jumpinjen

It just sounded right to me.... I am halfway through my early years diploma with MCi at the moment, starting TP at the end of Feb!!!

Jenni

Ah there are a few on here interested in doing the training and as far as I know there are 2 of us oldies already trained - we did it at MCi when it was London Montessori Centre I did mine in Dublin (not there anymore) and as far as I can remember other member did hers in London. I was last in the centre in Balderton street in Feb 2003 when I attended a conference.

**FussyElmo** · 22-01-2010, 07:34 AM

The thing with pencil grips that sometime you have to get the correct one to suit the person. My son needed a thick chunky triangluar one, the other boy needed a small round one.

My son needs help with his handwriting but is alot older at 8. I have been given an activity bag to do with him at home to help encourage his fine motor skills and all of them are easy to do at home.

If you want the details pm me and I will send you them

**sandy64** · 22-01-2010, 07:10 PM

hi i had a lo who had probs so started again with paint brushes then chalks when mark making had improved i then offered crayons with grips we got there in there own time 12mths on now does lovely picyures and writes name so try not to worry.