Breastfeeding Influences

[LOOPYLISA]

I didn't breastfeed - I had c-sections with both my 2 and felt under pressure from media, newspapers, articles in magazines that "breast is best" but after going through an emergency c-section feeling almost like death lol, the last thing you think about is breastfeeding so 1st baby was given bottle. Had no health problems, no asthma, no excema, nothing. Healthy and always has been. (he is 13)
5 years later baby no.2 - had no intention of breast feeding - my bg boobs were sore enough as it was. Bottle fed her - no health issues, no allergies, nothing so far (she is almost 8) touch wood.
My mother, sister etc all bottle fed too so I suppose that influenced me.
I used to feel annoyed by people/midwifes who told me I should have breastfed - who's decision was it - it was mine. I feel strongly that we women shouldn't be pushed into breastfeeding like my sister was - her baby wouldn' latch, her nipples were bleeding, she cried and cried and felt useless midwives told her to keep trying, HV told her not to give up they tried to help her butthey pushed her too. Until my mum had anything to say about it! lol. She gave baby bottle and he took it straight away - again, healthy 16 year old boy!

[EmmaReed84]

I so wanted to BF, however all did not go to plan. I got induced due to pre-eclampsia, things went wrong and it was a horrific experience (actually surprised I had another child TBH)

Anyway about an hour after my son was born the MW came and told me he needed feeding. He didn't latch on, he was tired, I was tired and very emotional, not to mention dosed up on all sorts. The MW kept saying (pushing) that I needed to do it... To the point she was literally grabbing me and pinching my so hard to get my son to take, She made me move in all sorts of positions, I was crying and kept saying I couldn't do it and to give him a bottle.

She kept pushing and pushing and saying things to make me feel like I wasn't trying. In the end my Mum had to shout at her and tell her to leave me alone because she was distressing me AND my son, who by this point was screaming.

Son got a bottle and was fine... During my second pregnancy I point blank refused to even try because of my past experience now I bitterly regret not trying, but I was so scared of going through the same again.

[boxtree7]

When my daughter was born in 1998 the midwife asked are you breastfeeding ... My husband said yes she is ( I am glad he did I would be still making the decision) -there was no support in the hospital I did self taught but with my son who was born in 2010 the hospital did all they could to encourage me and I wanted to it correctly but my son wasn't interested so after being pulled and poked by the breastfeeding experts after day 4 I told the midwife I am putting my bra on and its not coming off and I would like a bottle for my son.

[jelly15]

if it helps I didnt breadfeed and was put off by the midwifes in the hospital as they just kept grabbing my boobs and trying to put baby on, in the end I felt like a useless peice of meat which meant when my 2nd child was born I didnt even try and went straight to the bottle
I know you asked for what influenced but negatives also may help you decide the best way to help people, I feel there is a lot of preasure to breast feed these days and it just isnt for everyone and dosent work for everyone and maybe supporting all mothers rather than just breastfeeding mums would be good.

I had a similar experience and it didn't help that we were in the process of building our own home and staying with my parents and my mother was very disapproving of me bfing, so I gave up in a matter of days and didn't bother with second baby at all.

[~Chelle~]

I breastfed both my sons, no influences at all, as all my family members bottle fed their babies.

I am glad that I did and both my sons are healthy

[Toothfairy]

I breast fed all 4 of mine but only for the first 3-4 months, as my milk seemed to dry up naturally by then.
I wasn't influenced by anyone, it was just the natural thing to do for me.

HTH

[RachelE]

I wasnt BF and didnt really have any interest in it and was unsure.

Ds was born in 2001 by CSection and weighed 11lbs 11ozs. I tried to BF for 10 days, but I was so sore from the section - he was too heavy to lift and I couldnt get up and down easily - so after 10 days I gave him a bottle. He's a very healthy 10 yr old now.

I had dd in 2006 and wasnt going to BF anyway, but found out at 34 weeks pregnant that I had cancer and would be spending a week in hospital when she was 5 weeks old for treatment and didnt want to leave her with dh, when she wanted bf'ing.
After I gave birth to dd, I asked for some formula and the midwife was very rude - it was on my notes about my cancer! She is also very healthy after being bottle fed.

Rachel x

[Loushah]

I breast feed both boys for a short period of time and both times after me suffering with cracked, bleeding nipples and feeding boys in pain with tears. My husband made a bottle and took over, both times I didn't want him too but he did it regardless....I know he only wanted to help but I felt like he took my right to breast feed from me :-(

[PixiePetal]

I breast fed my 2 (now 17 and 15) for about 5/6 months

It felt right for me and no one influenced me in their opinions/ways. Everyone has their idea - HV/midwife/Dr/friends. I listened but knew I would know what was right for me I introduced bottles of expressed milk by 6 weeks or so and formula as my milk slowed down. I think I did it right for me as no problem stopping when I did as milk had slowly lessened over months.

It helped with DS, who was a big baby (10lb 7.5oz)and I had lost the use of my shoulder and hip during labour (use came back over a period of 2 months) that I was not making bottles and could just wedge him on a cushion at the right level

Listening to advice is good and if it feels right - do it! If not don't feel pressured. My friends DD was fully bottle fed - you really can't tell the difference now they are teens

[loocyloo]

i wanted to BF, and was keen to do so, but DS just wouldn't play the game!

i was in hospital for 4 days after he was born and although he would latch on, he just wouldn't suck! the midwives were generally supportive, although i did have a young midwive who was very rough at grabbing my boobs and ds and trying to make it work! i ended up expressing and lap feeding as well as continueing to try and feed. after over a week i stopped trying, and went to bottles and even then, ds took a long time each feed to be persuaded to suck! i saw a BF counseller in hospital who made me feel about 2 inches tall because it wasn't working and told me i HAD to carry on trying and not give up. she was not at all supportive. she told me stories off women who had to try for 6/8 weeks before babe got the hang of feeding. i wanted to enjoy my baby, and my baby to be happy, not the sad hungry baby i did have those first few days. ( the young midwive was the first midwive to visit me at home and she was again, not very supportive. i felt she was telling me not to be silly, of course ds would feed, just to get on and feed him. i asked not to see her again! )

when i had dd, she was born at 10.30pm, and again, despite latching on, she didn't really feed more than a mouthful, and at 5am, after being awake pretty much all night, and with dd crying i asked for a bottle so i could feed her. the wonderful midwive said ok, came back with a bottle, then said she would take Dd and feed her and let me get some sleep. later on i told midwive the trauma i had had trying to feed ds and that i wasn't doing that again! i attempted to BF, but when after a week or so, dd was still not interested, i didn't worry. she also, was a dreadful feeder.

i do wish i had been able to BF, but valued the people who supported me and accepted my decision without making a fuss. but i don't feel bad about not doing it. i know i tried and that is good enough for me.

i was bottle fed, think my brothers were too, and i was the first in the family and pretty much in most of our friends to have children. although, having always worked in childcare, i had lots of friends who BF, and had had good experiences.

[Pinkrose]

My family were my influence, my mum and sisters had breastfed so it was the natural thing to do, I did not even consider bottles. I found the first few weeks really really hard with m first and would have given up but my family gave me loads of support

[Spangles]

Thank you everyone for sharing your personal experiences with me.

I really appreciate it and it's given me a better understanding of how women are influenced and what experiences they are having.

x

[PRINCESSDAISYFLOWER]

When I was pregnant with ds1 I wasnt too sure either way what I was going to do. I had a fantastic labour with him until it got to the pushing stage, He turned back to back and face presentation and needed an emc. I was devistated it was so far from what i wanted. I felt (and no offence to others who have had sections this was my own opinion) that my body had failed me and I had been robbed of giving birth to my child something I continuously beat myself up about. So I insisted on bf as I wanted to prove to myself and others that my body wasnt useless and could do something (all of this in a hormonal post baby haze) only problem was ds1 had other ideas and wouldnt latch on. I was devistated again, thought I was the worse mum in the world and was told by several professionals to give up. It got so bad that I would actually sneak off into the bathroom to express a pathetic amount of milk cause I didnt want to dry up.

When ds1 was 6 weeks old he started rooting at me in bed and suddenly latched on, my milk had almost dried up so it was hard work getting my supply up but I did and fed him till he was 14 months.

ds2 - planned to have a vbac, wanted it to be everything ds1 birth wasnt. did hypnobirthing etc. Waters broke nothing happened. I had undiagnosed strep b another emc (gutted) ds2 born had meningitus and was given a bottle. once out of sbu tried to feed wouldnt latch on, he was badly tongue tied, had to express and feed for 2 weeks till he had his tongue snipped and then fed till he was a yr.

So to answer your question it was my own self-esteem that made me bf. I felt I was robbed of giving birth to both my boys and during the baby blue stage felt inadequate as a mother and a woman and wanted to prove to myself that I could do it. After this it just became a thing both me and my children loved.

[jumpinjen]

I fed both my daughters exclusively and am now feeding my son still at 7 months old. I struggled very time to get the hang of it and suffered pain and frustration, cracked and bleeding nipples, mastitis multiple times, thrush, you name it but i really really wanted to do it and it was important to me. No one ver suggested giving up and that was important too. My experience with counsellors has been mised, some supportive (especially BFN on the phone0 and some that made me feel inadequate, but I pressed on regardless and all three seemed to sort it out and feed easily once they reached about 6 weeks old. i don't think the nhs leaflets of flawlessly feeding babies help as they make it seem like it is really easy and that babies should pop out and jump on the boob. what they don't tell you is that babies are born with the instinct to feed but not the know how and both of you have to learn and that for most people it isn't a breeze! I suffered post natal depression undiagnosed until my second daughter was 2 1/2 but the fact that i succeeded with feeding them myself was a good part for me!

Jen x