Need to get this off my chest

[Ticktoria]

This has nothing to do with childminding but I need to get it off my chest.

A bit of background, we're English and have lived in South Wales for the last 6 years, my DD (3 1/2) was born here and classes herself as Welsh She is very shy and when gets anxious she cannot speak - I dont mean she wont I mean she cannot speak, you can actually see her forming words without any noise, shes brilliant with people she knows and feels relaxed with and has an extensive vocab.

Yesterday I was walking my dogs with my DD and Mindee when 2 older girls came to say Hello, the mindee said hello back, but my DD said nothing. The girls asked why she never spoke (they go to same primary school as her) and I said oh shes just shy, then one said "Mrs XXX from school says she doesnt speak because you speak differently at home" the other one said "yeah its because you sound different" Mrs XXX is a teaching assistant for KS2, she sees my DD on a Fri pm when they mix the whole school up for crafty fridays.

I am so furious and upset, and frustrated that I cant do anything until Monday!! thanks for reading I have no outlet as other forum I go on has local mums and dont want anyone to know as Im making a complaint to the head!

[Ripeberry]

Are you in the valleys? Just ignore them. I'm a Cardiffian and the valley lot say that WE sound funny down in the city. They don't mean any harm, it's just the way they are

But of course you need to talk to the Head as your DD does not need to have things like 'sounding different' pointed out.

I had a similar experience when I was younger. We were living abroad and then came back to the UK and within 1 week of arriving I was put straight into the local primary and I came straight from speaking French all day to having to speak English.
Of course all the kids thought it was hilarious to teach me all the rude words as they didn't know any different and for a while I did clam up as they made fun of my accent.

It does get easier eventualy, but your DD does need a more sympathetic helper.

[kindredspirits]

sorry I would be spitting feathers - no wonder your poor DD is shy at speaking when the teachers are saying she sounds different, even if its meant in a nice way you don't point it out, she's only 3 FFS!

[Pipsqueak]

I think I would be rather furious with Mrs XXX - she has made assumptions and passed them onto other children in the class. Even if its been well meaning its still wrong in all senses - as in inaccurate information for starters.

I was told - my middle sons speech (delay) problems were because 'I was southern and he was being bought up in the north' . What twaddle - this was said by a 'well meaning' NQT. According to her (as I listened opened mouthed) it was the different dialect/accents/pronunciations/inflections and I needed to change my vowel sounds so he could understand better.

As you can imagine I soon set her straight.....

[little chickee]

I had the same experience with my oldest child - at 2 1/2 - 3yo he really wasnt speaking much at all. According to my mum it was because i didnt talk to him enough ( i was not working, was home with my son all day and never stopped talking!)

and according to my mother in law it was because he couldnt understand my accent! I am english and live in north east scotland.

I was furious with both of them.

This teacher is very wrong to have said what she did, its one thing to think this herself and maybe to say it to the other teachers but to say it to the other kids is inexcusable.

Good luck for Monday and keep us posted.

[Ticktoria]

Thanks guys, at least I now know Im not over reacting by going to head on Monday. Will let you know how it goes.