parents wont leave

[kellyjef]

Hi all
I have a parent hows contracted time is 8 -6. They always pick up on time but never leave my house before 6.20. I have the children ready to leave but the parent comes in sits down asks them what they have done today. The childrens behaviour changes when the parent comes lots of screaming and shouting running up to my childrens rooms which i dont not allow. The parent counts to 30 and they are still srceaming. I would like them to be gone by ten 6. But how?

[Cottonsocks]

I used to get this. I still do to a certain extent bit no longer invite them in. When I go to the door the child comes with me, sits in the hall & puts their shoes on while parent, child & I talk. It works far better for me. Now if only I can get them in the car!!! Child gets in no problem but the parents want to chat about everything under the sun, not necessarily about their child. Hubby & I have a game sometimes about how quickly pick up can go. It's all going well then I start chatting about everything under the sun!! When parents are doing well I fail miserably!

[hectors house]

Don't sit down with them - stay standing, start putting toys away in toy boxes, giving quick overview of day - don't know how old children are but just say to parent "well I'm sure X & Y will be able to fill you in on all the details, see you tomorrow" and go to the door to indicate you want them to leave.

Or just say to parents you have to dash out to a meeting, pop to the shop - meet them at your door with your shoes and coat on and just hand the children over in the door way - break the habit, don't let assume they can come in and sit down for 20 mins.

[blue bear]

Have you tried telling the parent you can't chat for so long because you have x y and z to do, do you do a daily diary so mum can read about the day and also add any comments and questions.

Often people forget we are still working even though they are not, they see popping into someone's house as a social thing and feel rude to just collect and run, a frank chat usually sorts it out. Failing that have your coat and shoes on ready as if you have somewhere to be

[emma04]

Hi all
I have a parent hows contracted time is 8 -6. They always pick up on time but never leave my house before 6.20. I have the children ready to leave but the parent comes in sits down asks them what they have done today. The childrens behaviour changes when the parent comes lots of screaming and shouting running up to my childrens rooms which i dont not allow. The parent counts to 30 and they are still srceaming. I would like them to be gone by ten 6. But how?

This would drive me nuts!!!!

I have always handed over at the doorstep and parents only come in as far as the porch and only if it's raining!! I sound very harsh, but my working day needs to finish in just the same way theirs does 'on the button!!' otherwise my family time is encroached upon.

I suggest you either usher child out, do a quick handover (providing you do some sort of diary as well?) and explain you have to dash for whatever reason - do this every day until she gets used to not hanging around

Or be brutally honest and explain that you really need to have handover completed as quickly as possible as it can cause unwanted behaviour and stress all round.

I have a really good partnership with parents and I always explain the procedure of handovers at drop off and collection to all of them, they know what to expect and know that I am willing to arrange meetings with them, should there be anything lengthily that they want to discuss. Most parents want to dash anyway!

A child minder friend of mine had a parent that used to come in and put the kettle on herself!!!!!!!

Good luck

[angeldelight]

Hi all
I have a parent hows contracted time is 8 -6. They always pick up on time but never leave my house before 6.20. I have the children ready to leave but the parent comes in sits down asks them what they have done today. The childrens behaviour changes when the parent comes lots of screaming and shouting running up to my childrens rooms which i dont not allow. The parent counts to 30 and they are still srceaming. I would like them to be gone by ten 6. But how?

Meet them at the front door today

Close all your other doors

Pull the front door behind you a little and say family are eating .

Then continue it every night

Stay strong

Good luck

Angel xxx

[little chickee]

Very common problem.

As Angel says you need to be proactive - handover need not take any longer than 5 mins.

Have child ready, shoes and jacket and bag on. Open door, stand in front of door not letting parent in holding childs hand "hello how are you? X has been very good today, we did xxx." Hand over child, "if you don't mind my tea is on the table, see you tomorrow" Shut door.

After a few days parent will accept that this is now the handover procedure.

[Mouse]

I had this with one of my mums. She would arrive 15 minutes before start time, saying she wanted a chat first, then would stay for a good 20 minutes after pick up time, again for a chat.

I did a polite letter to everyone, reminding them that the contracted times were the earliest & latest the child could be on the premises. I explained that if parents wanted to chat in the morning, this needed to be done quickly after their drop off time. If they wanted to chat afterwards, they needed to arrive early and be gone by their contracted finish time (ie. any chatting was done within the contracted hours, not outside).

Even though the letter was addressed to all parents I only gave the letter to the mum who was a problem! All the others were happy for a doorstep handover, so it was never an issue.

The first day after I'd handed it out she arrived early again, so I was very blunt with her & explained the rules again. She was a bit funny with me, but has been the perfect parent ever since

[charlottenash]

I have one parent I stand up for, because I run out of conversation, her child has an extensive daily diary to read at home.

Another I love having a chat with, and never run out of convo but she always makes a move after 10 or so minutes. Yesterday we were laughing so much I was crying.

I finish at 5.30, one mum is sometimes late and texts 'can I pick up at 6' my response is always 'yes but not a minute later' because my son goes to bed at half 6, I don't have to justify that and she's never responded badly. Picks up dead on 6, and tells her child 'hurry up please, Charlotte is finished now'

[Kerry30]

I have a parent at the moment who comes in and sits down to play with x. Its annoying when its the last child to go as well. So b4 i went on holiday i had child at door ready and handed child to her. So mum puts x down on floor who goes off to play and mum follows grrr. They left 20mins later. So yestrday took x to door handed to mum and said i cant chat today got to go out everythings in the diary (as it always is). Trouble is i feel bad sounding so blunt.

[beachgirl29]

I used to have a parent who left there pushchair with me folded up in my living room and she would come just before 6 and her contract was till 6 and she would mess around with the pushchair....ask for a drink..! about 6.15 -6.20 by the time she left. So pushchairs are banned. Also had another parent who asked for a cup of tea and chatted on and on....so no tea when parents are about as its dangerous ( I don't tell them i have a covered travel cups)

My advice Just be at the door ready with child ready..i do this for one child as she turns very silly when mum comes.

[Nicola Carlyle]

If do a newsletter with something along the lines of..........
DROP OFF AND PICK UP
As time is very limited at the start and end of every day it is important that we all make drop offs and pick ups as quick and easy as possible. I have a duty of care to all the children in my care and just do not have the time to give a full run through of the days activities. I write everything in the daily diaries and would encourage you all to contribute to these should you have any queries or anything you would like to discuss. I am more than happy to arrange meetings should you wish to come in for a proper catch up and report on your child's progress. I would also like to take this opportunity to remind everyone of their contracted hours. If you feel these need to be adjusted then please do speak to me and can arrange the changes you need. Can I also stress that at the end of the day I may need to be heading out the door for appointments, clubs etc so I apologise if I'm in a but if a rush but I'd like to thank you for your continued support on this matter.

Newsletters work wonders for me. X

[emma04]

I have a parent at the moment who comes in and sits down to play with x. Its annoying when its the last child to go as well. So b4 i went on holiday i had child at door ready and handed child to her. So mum puts x down on floor who goes off to play and mum follows grrr. They left 20mins later. So yestrday took x to door handed to mum and said i cant chat today got to go out everythings in the diary (as it always is). Trouble is i feel bad sounding so blunt.

I always feel bad for being blunt, but parents get used to it and after all, they should be dying to get home in my opinion!! I am very chatty and will chat on the doorstep, but I have my own family in the house and I know DH would not appreciate a parent in his lounge after he's back from work and chilling out! I bet they wouldn't like it either!!

[Kerry30]

If i finished work i'd just want to pick my child up and get home.

[kellyjef]

Thanks all its getting better. Meet them at the door and talk to mum there. I feel mean because i think mum knows that its now my time but the children just really become silly screaming at her kicking and slapping her because they dont want to get in the buggy. They were kicking my front door because mum didnt have sweetd for them. Hopefully ill get it down to 10 mintues.

[Kerry30]

Ive managed to get it down to 10 mins at door too. Iv also started shutting door from hallway to rest of house as well. Dont no how its going to work next week when routine changes as back to school.

[sing-low]

I haven't had this (yet) but if I did I would tell parents that I needed to increase their contracted hours by 15 minutes. If a child is acting up, I'd consider I was still working and would thus expect to be paid.